Post # 1
My FI and I will be having a very casual wedding for financial reasons, but also bc it feels more us. No bridal party, simple JP ceremony. And then we will spend most of our budget on a fab vacation with his daughter as our first big family trip.
For a RECEPTION: We have a lot of international/ long distance friends who will want to come.I feel wrong not entertaining (at least a bit) those who traveled across the globe. But out families are not that excited for us, and not paying a dime. Neither of us are are that into the idea of a formal fancy reception for ourselves. Long story short: Planning a fancy wedding in a hall just won’t be fun.
We are on a budget. Before getting engaged we had talked a JUST family reception to save $, but again, our families are not so excited so we want our friends there to lighten to mood and make it fun.
To encompass all of these things we came up with the idea of a backyard “open house” style reception. We would get a bunch of stacks of burgers and hot dogs from costco and have a BBQ style meal. Total informal format. Come for ten minutes, come for three hours. Music, bubbles, games, drinks, desserts. Bring your dogs, bring your friends, bring your kids, bring your neighbor’s friend’s aunt.
I want some third party opinions on this. Are there possible “back fire” situations you could see happening beyond running out of burgers if too many people come (we would have RSVPs with # of attendees to get a ball park idea to KIND of minimize this risk).
Post # 3
@freshflowers: I think this sounds nice! You can always over-buy the burger/brauts and have someone ready to run tot he nearby store for buns if you run out. But with an RSVP count, you’ll do fine.
We do these kinds of parties, but then, we have a freezer in the basement where the extra stash of burger/brauts are stored.
Post # 4
@freshflowers: I think that sounds like a blast!! A relaxed and fun time with all who are important to you! The only concern I would have would be that you should make sure everyone knows what your plan is – don’t want anyone feeling “cheated” if they come such a long way for a BBQ. If it was my family or I we would be thrilled but my FI family is a little less laid back so I would just make sure they understood the plan.
Ultimately, anyone should be happy for whatever is planned because they are there to celebrate with you! If that is your style then they should love it because it represents you well. Also, it gives them a chance to be involved when they otherwise wouldn’t get to share in the moment with you.
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
@freshflowers: We had a welcome BBQ dinner the night before our wedding that sounds similar to this, and it was great. My only advice would be to make sure you have people who will do things like set food out, grill the burgers, etc. You do NOT want to be grilling burgers yourself on your wedding night! Partly because you deserve to just relax, but mainly because everyone and their mother wants to talk to you and you can’t be a good host if you’re grilling and working all night.
Post # 6
Can your toilet handle that many people? Haha. I had a friend who did that and ran in to some plumbing issues!
Post # 8
@Jbbee: Good thought!
Hmm… we only have one tiny bathroom in our house that makes sense for guests to use. Maybe we could do a decked out porto potty haha. I went to a party once where they DECKED OUT the porto potties with fancy towels and soap stations outside. While I don’t love porto potties, it did make a difference.
Post # 9
Some places do rent special wedding ones that are a little more classy. As classy as a toilet can be haha
Post # 10
I love the idea! It sounds really great. As long as you figure out the bathroom issue, you´ll be fine
Post # 11
They have some really lovely, large porta potties on trailers.. they have multiple stalls, sometimes air conditioning/lights and sinks and are quite fancy, but they do cost a pretty penny.
Post # 12
Sounds adorable and fun 🙂 The only issue I could see is if someone doesn’t know it’s a backyard BBQ and shows up in a super formal dress/suit. So as long as everyone knows, and you have an extra potty, then I say go for it without any reservations!
Post # 13
Start time? If it gets dark and you have just one back porch light people either go in the house or leave. We have white Christmas lights (on sale after Christmas) strung up all over our back yard. We also have some citronella torches out there so the bugs stay away.
I love the wedding porta potty idea 😀
Post # 14
I think this sounds great! It’s the total opposite of what I’m doing (I love planning fancy events), but I would definitely enjoy this style of wedding. The most important thing is that the celebration fits the couple.
Second a PP that says you should get someone else to man the grill.
If you literally do a google search for “fancy portable restrooms” there are a ton of options. I used to do competitive horseback riding, and the Hampton Classic has the NICEST porta potties. They were seriously just as nice as real bathrooms. Don’t know where you’re located, but this is the company that provides them: http://www.emilnorsic.com/
Post # 15
Sounds good to me, as long as you keep it casual backyard cookout style. I started with this idea, then decided I wanted more formalities, etc. Eventually it evolved into a full reception and we needed to rent a tented space, lol.
However, if you truly keep it backyard cookout style it could be a lot of fun! Have you ever hosted something like that in your yard?
Logistically, I would do daytime, like 1-2pm start time. If it runs into evening thats fine, there will already be less people. You could maybe do a campfire and smores for those around in the evening. People coming and going will help with the parking some, but you could talk to your neighbors and see if they would be willing to help with some driveway space, etc. I would rent a porta potty, they usually run a thousand or so for the nice ones, I did a little research.
My biggest fear was weather, depending on the size, tents aren’t bad to rent. If you have a big enouhg house for everyone to chill inside in bad weather, I wouldn’t spend the money on a tent.
Post # 16
@NinjaDuck: LOVE the idea of a campfire and s’mores. We do cookouts all the time with my step-daughter to be and she loves it. That would be a great touch that she would love.
Weather is a concern for sure though…
Would a rain date for this type of thing be tacky? It doesn’t HAVE to be the same day as the wedding. Ex: Wedding on Saturday with a sunday rain date?