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Does your FI help or hinder your diet?

posted 2 years ago in Fitness
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    Blushing bee
    Rose999    April 11, 2011  

    So, I have always maintained a fairly healthy weight. I go up and down like everyone else and right now I need to tone big time, but I have certainly never looked like I was wasting away!

    Now, for reasons unknown to me, my FI turns into a little Italian grandmother whenever I'm on a diet, trying to get me to eat! Not overtly, I guess. When I say I'm trying to get in shape he talks about how great it is, we'll work out together, eat healthy, etc., etc. And yet...this is always followed by him bringing home ice cream (the guy never has food in his house!) suggesting dessert, taking me out to eat, etc. When I remind him of the diet he'll say something like "Oh, but you did so well today, you have to give yourself a break sometime," or "Well one dessert won't change anything."

    Let me also say that he is in great shape so it's not like he's self conscious about me getting in shape and him falling behind!

    It's not a big deal and if I tell him to cut it out he will, but just curious if anyone else has noticed this pattern! 

     
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    gloss    August 1, 2009   Boston/Maine

    It totally depends how his week goes.  If he's stressed/busy he just wants to relax and not cook (ie pizza delivery).  If he's not busy we go to the gym together....

    Too bad he's been super busy lately!!

     
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    IA_Snowflake    August 29, 2009   Missouri Valley, IA

    My fiance hinders my diet, I can't eat like I need to with him and the kids when I'm at home.  He also likes to eat out a lot so that doesn't help either (last week we went to a restaraunt/bar - it was the only one in the town we were in.  I tired to be good and order the salad - they were out of lettuce!)

    I'm bad though too.  When I'm dieting I have no problem staying away from sweets, so I stock up the house with them so he'll eat them.  Then he's not losing a ton of weight while I am and then I feel bad about him losing more.  I suck.

     
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    Mrs. DG    July 18, 2009   Seattle/Tahoe

    Ah, my sister has experience with the pattern you are talking about.  Her husband doesn't realize it, but often tries to sabotage her diet.

    We have a different pattern.  If I substantially change my diet, fiance loses weight.  Earlier in the year, I lost 5 lbs and fiance accidentally lost 10.  Not only was it totally maddening that he drops weight like crazy, but the boy can't really afford to drop 10 lbs.

    So while I'm eating healthy salads for dinner, he needs to make sure to get some greasy burgers once in awhile!

     
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    Chantellamus    October 15, 2009  

    were up and down...but we certainly there for one another when were in full snacking mode...take for instance - last night:

    Didnt know what we wanted for dinner so ended up going out and buying 2 bags of chips (1 bag each) a chocolate marble cake and popcorn...I ate a full bag of popcorn...

    but then there are the times he wants to get a pizza - I dont eat pizza so when he orders it he eats the whole thing to himself...so that groses me out and I have called a strict no pizza ban in the house. That is my main support for him. no pizza! ha ha

    he is good with me, he tells me not to eat things because they're going to make me sick (I have a very bad stomach when it comes like food I listed above) but I still eat it anyways and in so much pain afterwards. he warns me but he wouldnt force or make me stop...I am a grown woman he won't tell me what to do, just warns me. one of these days I'll hopefully listen

     
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    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    Mr. MJ does both. We both are trying to stay on somewhat of a diet, and sometimes we're good, but other times we're each other's worst nightmare. For example: he'll often observe me overeating and remind me that I've probably have enough. That's great (though a little annoying when i'm nomming on something fabulous). But then he'll also suggest we go for ice cream, or go out to breakfast, etc. That ALWAYS leads to overeating.

    (And he's not the only one - I'm just as bad. I try to help him not drink so much soda... but then when I'm at the store I'll buy him a candy bar just 'cause I was thinking of him and knew he'd like one.)

    Ugh, we're both bad!

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    RoddyBride09    September 5, 2009   Bethlehem, PA

    My FI helps and hinders my diet. Like right now he is helping because he is back on his diet due to possible genetic heart problems (we'll find out tomorrow Does your FI help or hinder your diet? :  wedding Icon Sad). So we purchase healthy foods for the house and we don't eat out much then. BUT when he falls off the wagon, so do I. Unlike me, he can eat and lose weight. I eat and I gain another appendage, YIKES!! So it's semi-OK for him to eat whatever he wants and not have any after effects. Boy does that suck to see that. Even though I know I am responsible for my weight and health I love having him around because he becomes my motivator (and de-motivator Does your FI help or hinder your diet? :  wedding Icon Biggrin)...

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    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    My Fi is all about encouraging me to eat healthy but not following it himself. He has chicken tenders, beer, and that kind of stuff regularly. It's a once in a blue moon thing for me. I love it, but i also don't digest greasy foods well so I try to remind myself of THAT unpleasant side effect. But, I have a rule: no junk in the house. Otherwise I find it an eat it. Unless it's chocolate or ice cream, both of which i only eat when i REALLY want it. serious cravings only. He's all, "just don't eat my junk" which, we know how that works. Bag of chips in the house=demolished. I know my willpower and this is why i don't buy stuff! Better for my bank account, too, so I try to remember that when I'm staring at Doritos and they're $2.99 a bag. 

    Not sure how it'll work when he moves into the house finally. He can't work out because of physical therapy so he knows he can't just eat junk all the time. And being an Army guy for the last 4 years, well, running 5 miles a day does kind of give you carte blanche to eat what you want. He does have a much higher metabolism than me and can eat whatever he wants more or less. I can not. He also will probably not like me going to the gym 5 days a week if he's at home 24/7 watching TV until he gets a job. He says he can lift weights and do the elliptical or bike while i'm in a high impact class though. I'll probably end up dragging him more than he drags me. But he knows I refuse to become his sloth buddy. I always tease him, "but i'll get faaaaat if i stay home and eat X, Y, and Z with you and don't work out...you don't want that now, do you? I'll have to buy all new clothes!" and he goes, "no, I don't want that, go to the gym" and is cool with it. I just have to stay self motivated to roll out of bed by 8 on my Saturday mornings to go to step class.  He also likes to make bacon, eggs, and hash browns every weekend. THis is going to become a once or twice a month thing. He can make it while i'm at the gym. 

    Oye vez, I've been worried about this since we got engaged and how his unhealthy food habits would affect my very healthy (tofu, etc) life

     
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    myvette13      

    <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt" class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 7.5pt; font-family: Verdana">I think I may be a little lucky here.  I live in the city so I walk everywhere which is a huge help to the diet.  But also I do most of the grocery shopping and most of the cooking so the FI can't sabotage any efforts to eat healthy.  That being said, he likes me curvier so if he thinks I've lost weight he will nag me to eat more.  While I can't complain that he is happy with me, a compliment would be nicer ;-)

     
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    hamster    May 30, 2010  

    Definitely hinders!  I don't think he does it purposely, but he likes to eat junk food sometimes and when I see him eating it, I can't resist.  So really, it's a combo of his junk food and my (lack of) self-control.  Does your FI help or hinder your diet? :  wedding Icon Redface

     
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    Karma007    10/10/2009   Bay Area

    Helps! My FI is my inspiration; since we moved in together last fall, he's quit smoking AND lost 20+lbs. In fact, we have to buy him a new suit b/c he's lost SO much weight, the old one can't be altered.  He's turned in to a dedicated gym-rat, but doesn't say a word when I reach for the cookies after a bad day. He is amazing!

     
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    attybride    9/25/10   Boston, MA

    My FI totally helps!  He eats very healthy foods anyway, so he's a good role model for me.

     
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    Jessie516    May 16, 2009   Ann Arbor, MI

    My husband is actually a huge help with diet, which has been great.  He has diabetes, so that means that he has to always be aware of what/when he's eating.  He is usually great about helping us stay on track and cooking healthy meals.  I think it's way easier to stick to a diet/exercize plan if both partners are on the same thing.

     
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    cfitz621    July 17, 2010   Memphis, TN

    Definitely hinders!  He has a monster sweet tooth, where I could really care less.  So he's always the one looking for cookies, icecream, whatever.  But of course I can't let him eat all that good stuff by himself . . .

    He does eat more fruit than I do, so I buy more because of this which is good for us both. 

     
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    soontobewalsh    09/18/10   Boston

    My FI definitely hinders my diet. I have always had a fast metabolism and have actually had trouble my whole life putting weight on...until the last 2 years or so when my metabolism has slowed due to age. My FI (who is also 3 yrs younger than me) also has a fast metabolism, has always been into fitness, and goes to the gym 5 days a week. Therefore he eats all he wants and never gains an ounce.

    Every night he has a snack (sometimes two) before bed. He always manages to sit close enough for me to smell the wonderful treat (chips, cookies, dips, etc) and then offers some to me. I resist at first but he always breaks me down, LOL. I have gained 15-20 lbs over the last two years we've been living together. So unfair!

     
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    Chianti    July 23, 2010   Northern Virginia

    If I had one major complaint about my dear FI, this would be it. He knows I'm trying to eat better and to get in shape, yet he constantly brings home fattening things I love. Take yesterday, for instance. We went grocery shopping together and here I am picking out veggies, lean meats and whole grains...and what does he pick? Ribs...gool ol' fashioned, thick BBQ-ey ribs...thanks, babe.

    Part of me feels bad, though, because he's usually the one do the grocery shopping, and mostly by himself. I know ladies, amazing, but it's true. Which is why I feel like I can't always say anything. I know many women who would be so grateful that their men are doing the grocery shopping, and here my guy is, doing it and not giving gripe about it. BUT...it does sabotage my goals. 

    @soontobewalsh - I too understand the frustration. My guy is one of those men who can seem to eat just about anything and not gain any weight. Me, on the other hand....well, let me just say I know where you're coming from. I too have put on weight since we've been living together...weight that I worked hard to lose and KEPT off for three years prior to us moving in together...

     
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    stormy9973    October 3, 2009   Ottawa, KS

    My FI helps for awhile but then hinders.  I'm used to eating dinner every nite, but he sometimes isn't hungry and doesn't eat, so then I feel bad about eating alone!  And when we go grocery shopping we always have to buy chips.  He loves chips and that's fine except when it is raining outside or cold or I'm having a not so great day and then I end up eating the chips.  My thing is, if it isn't in the house I won't be tempted to eat it, which I know is my problem and I'm trying.  We do walk almost every nite together, but just exercising for me doesn't cut it, I only have to look at the bag of chips and I gain!!!  We both have gained weight since meeting each other and are trying to lose for the wedding.  But is very discouraging when you see him losing and you're not!!!  But I'm gonna do it!!! 

     
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    august15bride    August 15, 2009   St. Petersburg, FL

    My fiance is a help, but totally annoying at the same time. He is 5'7" and weighs 140 and has the nicest butt on the planet. I am 5'6", weigh 146 and the butt? Not so nice. My fiance doesn't eat sweets, at all. Which I guess helps because we don't keep them around. But he just sits on the couch and loses weight. Seriously. Annoying. :)

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    RecessionistaBride    January 28, 2012  

    I hinder HIS diet. When we go out, I order an appetizer & I'll have one bite... he feels he needs to finish off the rest. I don't eat pasta or really any grains at night, but he can't have a meal without it. I always end up making extra portions (I'm not used to cooking for 2) and I serve it to him.

    I can't keep crackers or any sort of snack food in the house because he is a mindless eater, where as I can have just 1 or 2 and be satisfied. I'm making him fat through my own food selfishness. I wanna try "just a little" of something & he eats the rest.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    bluespurrs    August 7, 2009   South-central PA, USA, Earth

    Mine definitely hinders my diet - I sometimes fast a day after being around him! He loves to take me out to eat and I am horrible at staying on my diet when I go out.

     
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    CellarDoor    July 30, 2009  

    Our roles are totally reversed. I'm the skinny-minny in the relationship, and while my FI isn't overweight he's always trying to eat reasonably. I just love staying at his place because I never remember to stock snacks (even though I love 'em, yum!) and he keeps them in the house. But he has this thing called self-control: when I'm not around he's fine with just having a little snack or two, but when I'm there, I'm like, "Cookies in bed! The whole box!"

    I think it completely annoys him. But just watch: if he keeps buying snacks the way he does and I keep eating them the way I do, pretty soon I'm going to be the one complaining about *him* getting in the way of my weight loss.

     
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    MsAnnaLytical    March 13, 2010   Orlando, FL--finally with my FI!

    Wow, it's nice to see that I'm not alone in this! I just moved in with my FI last week and had already been having trouble sticking to my diet (parents and friends kept wanting to take me out to dinner and lavish me with rich delicious foods since I was moving away!). I thought, "Oh, it'll be easy, he'll totally help me to eat healthy."

    WRONG. We keep passing places and he'll say, "That's such a great local place, we have to go there, " and my resolve just falls apart. It's hard to convince ourselves to work out right now, too, because Orlando is 96 every afternoon when he gets off work! Ugh. I'm going to have a talk with him this afternoon and tell him that this seriously has to stop for my weight, health, and our budget! It doesn't help that he is naturally thin while I gain five pounds just looking at a slice of cheesecake.

    It's nice to know that we're not alone in the couple weight debaucle! :)

     
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    bearcub    September 2009   Portland / La Serena, Chile

    for us, we often sabotage each others' diets! 

    Mr. BC LOVES candy, and I love cookies.  We try to cook healthy, but he usually keeps candy in the pantry.  I crave cookies, so I bake them almost once a week!!

    Then he eats the cookies (cause they're there, and tasty), and when the cookies are gone, I eat his candy.  It's a vicious cycle.  We're trying to offset by running together 5 times a week.  So far, so good, but with all this running, I haven't lost a single pound yet.

     
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    kim0309    March 28, 2009   VA

    Totally hinders!!! I was good before the wedding, super strict and just made my own dinners every night. I lost about 8 lbs. Now that the wedding is over I honestly gained like 12lbs in 3 months!!! YIKES!!! Now I'm trying to get that back off and all we want to do is relax and not stress about dieting! Without the motivation of a wedding dress I'm more likely to skip the gym and just go home to snuggle with my sweetie. So bad.

     
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    K610    June 2010  

    My fiance helps. Though we both like pizza, cookies, all that stuff, he does have to watch what he eats to stay fit, and has to stay fit for the Army. He really likes produce too (lots of fruits and vegetables, etc). I know he'll keep me accountable in terms of what food we eat, and he is always asking when I worked out last! At times my instinct is to be annoyed but I'm glad I'll have him to help me stay on track. We'll motivate each other to eat good foods and keep exercising!

     

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