Post # 1
Just wondering. I feel like J isn’t great at suprises. I’ve picked out all my birthday/Christmas presents (he doesn’t even want a long list to choose from on his own, he wants to know what exactly I want him to buy me. Heck, I was on the phone with him 2 weeks ago while he ordered me my bday present off Amazon) and if I haven’t picked them out, he tells me about them ahead of time. Like last Christmas, he got me a gorgeous strand of freshwater pearls, but he told me like 2 months ahead of time that “I think for x-mas, I’m going to get you a strand of pearls like my mom and sis have.” Apparently it’s like a family thing. Cute, BUT WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL ME?!
I picked out my engagement ring (my request) but then LAST Christmas he said he’ll probably propose to me around Christmas time this year. Really, I know the month I’m getting proposed to?!
I just want to be a little surprised sometimes. I feel like sometimes he asks me what I want because he’s worried about getting the wrong thing (cute) but then I feel like he doesn’t know my tastes at all.
Is this something that gets better the longer you’ve been together/been married? YOur SO grows to know what you like more? Or do I just have a SO that sucks at surprises?
Not mad at him or anything, just curious what goes on in other Bee’s relationships.
Post # 3
Yeah but he does it right. He does NOT surprise me with the big things. My control complex would flip if he did. But, he does routinely surprise me with resturant choices, some little thinking of you thing…like my favorite gum or candy, on occassion flowers or he’ll send me a new book on my kindle.
and I’m ok with this.
Post # 4
@Paiger8: Haha this reminds me so much of my fiance. He’s great and I love him to death, but he is awful at surprises. He just doesn’t really think to do them. He’s planned a couple things (mostly when we were first dating) but always ended up telling me before hand. Lately it seems like he never even attemps to surprise me.
You aren’t alone and I feel better knowing that mine isn’t the only one lol 😉
Post # 5
I am sort of like you OP! For Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, ect. I have always just picked out what I wanted! It has nothing to do with him not knowing my tastes but just for the fact that I want what I want. lol
He does surprise me with flowers & small things though wish is always nice!
We have been together for almost 6 years in total & almost 2 years in marriage. So I don’t think it has to do with that. He knows me better than I know myself. The times he has picked me out surprise gifts he NAILED it. But like I said for birthdays, holidays, ect. I know its coming up & make a wish list for what I want. So he has just always known ahead of time. lol
Like my birthday is in less than a month & I have already bookmarked a pair of earrings from Berricle.com & a few small things like that. He knows exactly what I want so that is more than likely what I will get. 😛
Post # 6
First off I have say I don’t care about being suprised by gifts, growing up I always wanted one thing for a gift for birthday/christmas and since what I wanted wasn’t usually expensive I’d get it and some other stuff. FI has only suprised me with a gift once in two years, on Valentines day, with a video game. Fun part is I suprised him with a game too. But, I feel I’m suprised by all the little things he does on an every day basis where he thinks of me and that matters more to me.
Post # 7
For gifts and large things, no surprise would make me happy.
But, he does little things a few times a day that surprise me and let me know he’s thinking of me.
Post # 8
My SO is helpful around the house, and very thoughtful and practical…so I NEVER get surprises…I ASK for date nights, and he then asks me where I want to go and what I want to do. Last weekend I gave NO input, and he took me to my favorite restaurant. I’ve learned to thank him and be thankful he’s a great guy and very thoughtful…just not spontaneous/impractical. :-/
Post # 9
Neither of us really likes surprise b-day or holiday gifts so we always take each other shopping. He does surprise me with flowers every now and then, which I really love.
Post # 10
We’ve been together for 8 years and he still surprises me. He manages to surprise me with birthday and Christmas gifts (usually because I don’t think he’s listening when I say I like something), he took me on a surprise proposal vacation, and he will randomly cook amazing homemade meals complete with a new cocktail recipe when I least expect it.
Post # 11
I make him surprise me with gifts for Christmas and Birthday. He would prefer me picking things out myself, but I always tell him that I want him to put thought into it and get something he really thinks I’d like.
Post # 12
not with gifts – he’s told me he’s too afraid to pick stuff out. For holidays/bdays I send him links
but for everyday stuff – yes. For example – I have really thin skin. Literally. I can cut myself wide open on a piece of paper. Lets not even get into opening boxes.
Sometimes I open the cupboard or fridge to see that he’s cut the tops off the boxes for me. Things like that make me love him even more.
Post # 13
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
He is great at surprising me with little things, like handpicked flowers, washed my car, etc. etc. like everyday stuff. He’s HORRIBLE at keeping a secret for presents!! He always lets me guess and then gets disappointed when I guess, or he pushes me asking if I want to know what it is, haha. We actually exchanged anniversary gifts just a few days ago… which is actually 2 weeks early!
Post # 14
@Paiger8: Don’t worry about it too much, all that matters is he wants to make sure you’re happy. As for knowing the month of the proposal, I knew the week it would happen, and was even able to acurately pinpoint the specific activity he did it on. I don’t think proposals are something that should be a surprise, couples have to talk marriage anyways, just be happy when he does do it.
Post # 15
my bear also surprises me with little things, especially when it comes to dinner – if i work later than him, of course. and i never say what i want for birthday or christmas, so his gift has to be a surprise. he never failed at picking something i really need tho. :3
Post # 16
I’m the type of person who doesn’t like surprises, I guess I like being in control and knowing whats going on, but my FI loves surprises! he won’t even watch a long movie trailer because he thinks it will ruin the movie for him. He loves to surprise me, which I don’t love but I appreciate lol
For my 16th birthday we had a full candlelight dinner at a little restaurant, which I had no idea about, and he invited all of our friends over for a full surprise party the next day! 🙂