Does your SO/FI/DH expect you to "have dinner on the table?"

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Does your SO "expect" you to do certain things?
    Yes, and I don't mind at all! : (50 votes)
    15 %
    Yes, but it bothers me. : (11 votes)
    3 %
    No, I do what I want and so does my SO! : (241 votes)
    72 %
    No, but I expect my SO to do certain things! : (34 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    8708 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    My husband isn’t allowed to cook. The kitchen is my domain.

    So, yeah. He expects me to cook for him every night.

    Post # 4
    Member
    124 posts
    Blushing bee

    @bmo88:  we share chores so yes he does expect dinner on the table but in the same respect I expect laundry to be done. So it’s a 50:50 deal. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    2355 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    Saying, “Oh, I have to get dinner on the table,” sounds like a pretty standard thing to me. She may be the cook of the household, but that doesn’t mean he’s got her chained up in the kitchen. Are you sure you aren’t being overly critical of your friend’s relationship?

    ETA: I cook, I pack his lunch every day, I do the laundry, etc. I want to do those things. It would be odd for SO to come home to no dinner, but if I said I didn’t want to cook one night, he wouldn’t be like, “Woman, do your job!”

    Post # 7
    Member
    8917 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    HA! No. My husband cooks about 95% of our home-cooked meals. I snagged a good one. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    1506 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    @bmo88:  It isn’t expected per se, but I am a TERRIBLE cook, so SO makes dinner every night. I definitely dont fit into that womanly expectation 😛

    We both do the laundry and cleaning, though.

    Post # 11
    Member
    422 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    the extent of my cooking is mac n cheese or spaghetti. i can do tv dinners too. aside from that, i dont cook. i work full time as does dh. theres no way im coming home to cook every night. we also share the responsibility of cleaning. he lives here too, so he should be cleaning up after himself

    Post # 12
    Member
    6407 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Well no, he’s the one who puts dinner on the table (he’s the household chef). I mostly stay out of his kitchen. I am the household taste-tester though 🙂

    Post # 13
    Member
    567 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    whoever gets home first starts cooking.. the other woulfd have to do the dishes..

    most of the time we cook together and he does the dishes :DDDDDDDDDD

    and i ammmm soo happy for that!.. i had a talk with him previously about how much work I have and that rushing to go home and cook for both of us all the time would be tiring and since then he has started to learn how to cook.. i am forever grateful he does listen :))))

    Post # 14
    Member
    693 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @bmo88:  Nope!  We take turns cooking, doing the dishes, laundry, etc.  The only thing I don’t do is clean the bathrooms.  I take out the trash periodically, we take turns with the dog, etc.

    If he ever told me that he expected dinner on the table when he got home, he’d get a microwaved TV dinner…

    Post # 15
    Member
    1148 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    We don’t often eat at home (working in a restaurant does have its perks!), but when we do we usually either take turns cooking, or fend for ourselves.

    As far as other chores, we split them. But my husband is “in charge” of lawn care as far as mowing and whatnot, and I do 95% of the laundry, otherwise it would never get done. But my husband does know if his clothes are not in the hamper, I AM NOT hunting them down from wherever he left them. If they aren’t in there, they aren’t getting done.

    Post # 16
    Member
    76 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    My SO and I are on totally opposite schedules (he works nights and I go to school during the day) so he definitely doesn’t “expect” me to cook, because sometimes he has already left for work when I get home from school. I try to cook whenever I can, but he is more than fine with feeding himself. We split things pretty evenly.. I cook and take care of cleaning the bathroom, he does the dishes and cleans the kitchen/vacuums the carpets, and we each do our own laundry. It works for us. I’m thankful he doesn’t “expect” me to do everything because I’ve never been a neat or tidy person – I’m learning from him lol

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