(Closed) Dog on/off the bed dilemma

posted 9 years ago in Pets
Post # 3
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

My cats sleep on my bed now. Both of them. Well, there have been a few times where curiosity gets the best of them and they jump up on the bed to see what’s going on and we end up having to almost chuck them off the bed. It’s a pain, but it sure is nice to have some fuzzy love around when the FI isn’t around. But then again, my FI lives in Georgia. They manage to sneak their way on in the middle of the night now when he’s in town. 

I think it’s a mood killer, honestly. I can’t say I blame your FI. Everyone I know has theri dogs sleep in a crate or something outside the bedroom for thi reason. Personally, I think dogs leave smells on the bed. my parents’ dog slept in their bed and it always smelled like dog. I hated that =( Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

When my Fi suggested we start training our dogs to sleep on the floor, I was a little upset.  I mean, they’re kind of our babies, and I love cuddling with them at night.  But for the last few weeks our bed has been dog free, and I can’t even TELL you how happy I am!  It’s just so nice to not have all that fur in the sheets.  Plus, we actually get room to cuddle and … you know … at night instead of having to sleep on opposite sides of the bed. 

I totally understand how this would be a difficult adjustment for you or why you’d be really sensitive about this subject.  Could you maybe try it out for a couple weeks?  I was really surprised that I actually like having the dogs sleep on the floor.  And I think it was harder for me to get over than for the dogs.  If it doesn’t work out, maybe you and your Fi could compromise that dog gets to sleep on the bed X  number of days a week or only on the weekends.  However, even though it might seem a little difficult now, you really might like it if you give it a chance.

Post # 5
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

this is really a personal decision. i think you could go Mrs. Spring’s route and see how you like it. and who knows, maybe after a while your FI will get more used to doggy parenthood and want to have the dog up on the bed.  my FI and i sleep with the dog in the bed, every night. dog hair be damned.

Post # 6
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

My FI and I had this same "talk" about his cats.  Except, I hate his cats.  I am not a cat person.  I tolerate these because I love my FI.  But I would prefer that we not have them.  Problem is, you can’t "train" cats to do anything.  We can’t teach them to just stay off the bed.  So we’ve locked them out of our bedroom for the last several months.  They scratch on the door and meow loudly, but I am standing my ground.  I think it’s bad enough that they get on the sofa.  I hate all the cat hair.  I don’t sit on the sofa because I don’t like cat hair on me.  Wow, I sound like a horrible person.  Sorry!  It’s just how I feel.  FI and I want a dog once we’re married, but I don’t want it to get on the furniture.  FI says if they’re part of the family then they should be allowed.  We won’t get a dog until we’ve figured that part out.  🙂

Post # 7
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

My FH wants our dog on the bed but things is…..he sleeps between us! He is 10lbs too but still.

Post # 8
Member
14 posts
Newbee

No dogs on the bed!  :o)  The bed is for sexy time… or sleepy time.  ZZzzzzzz. 

Post # 9
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Our dog sleeps on her own couch, she’s really good about not getting on any of our furniture but her couch.  The cat on the other hand….sleeps wherever he wants. He’ll usually start out on the bed if FI goes to bed before me, then he’s up on his shelves to sleep on his pants.  It used to be on his boxers…why this is appealing to him I’ll never know. 

Post # 10
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Hotel Vitale

My Our dog sleeps in bed too. He’s 20 lbs. Recently we’ve discovered that we sleep better if the dog is next to me and I am in the middle because otherwise he’s a bed hog and Mr. PT lets him take over the entire bed. The dog wants to be in the middle, but I just move him.  If he is really annoyed- he ends up getting off the bed and sleeping on his own bed. Maybe you should try to keep him on one side- or getting him his own bed and testing it for a few weeks??

Post # 11
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Our home and the two acres it sits on

I think that sometimes you have to choose what’s important to you, and knowing the hierarchy of who matters helps.  I will admit that I sometimes have to remind myself that it’s Mr. Cheese first, cats second.  Or Mr. Cheese first, dogs second.  Or Mr. Cheese first, ice cream second.  Whatever.

When you look at it that way, the choice is pretty obvious, right?  The problem, for me, at least, was that it felt like the choice was between Mr. Cheese and myself.  He wanted the dogs off the bed, I wanted them on.  He wanted the cats out of the bedroom, I wanted them in.  To make things more complicated, I’m a cuddler, and he hates to be touched while sleeping, so kicking the animals out left me cuddle-less.

In the end, though, I’d be pissed if he chose the comfort of the cat/ dog (which is how it comes across, even if it’s not true) over mine… so I kick the cats out and make the dogs sleep in their crates.

But I don’t like it, and I do often pout. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
232 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

my dog is 60lbs and she sleeps on our bed.  we have a king size bed, and it is the best purchase i ever made!  my only rule is the baby girl is not allowed to sleep between us.  also, here’s a weird thing – when we start fooling around, she jumps off the bed like it’s on fire and sleeps downstairs on the couch – like we’re grossing her out or something! 

Post # 13
Member
3526 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I agree as well that it’s a personal choice. Our dog is 65 lbs, a HUGE bed hog (she takes up more room than the FI who’s 6’3!) but she sleeps on the bed with us every night. We had to go purchase a king bed because of her. hehe. The FI still has no room to sleep, poor guy.

I would say though that if you plan on teaching them to sleep off the bed when they’ve been used to sleeping on it it will probably take a lot of work. Just keep enforcing it and they’ll eventually get it.

Post # 15
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2009

for all u people with 60+lb dogs that hog up the king size bed…my 15lb-der does the same on my king size…so you’re not alone =PP before we got our puppy we were adament about NOT having the dog sleep with us…but that all went out the window the moment his big puppy eyes just stares at you…and now we can’t sleep without our puppy snuggled in between us, but to be fair though my puppy is actually cleaner than the hubby =PP

Post # 16
Member
398 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

No dogs allowed to sleep on our bed.  We have two dogs, one 45 lbs and one who is still a puppy (golden retrievers).  I can’t even imagine what it would be like to have both of our dogs sleep with us…I think I would move to the couch.  Both of our dogs have been trained from day 1 to sleep on their own beds on the sides of our bed…its cute really and they are fantastic about it.  Of course every once in a while we let them up on the bed for 30 mins just to spoil them.

I can’t suggest what you do, but good luck deciding!

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