Weddingbee boards

It just worked out that my birthday is two days before my wedding. As a result, my mom would like to throw me a birthday party for me and my bridesmaids - she is deciding between a tea party, which would include some of my female relatives as well, or a girl's night out type of thing with a limo and drinks and just the bridesmaids. This is something she really wants to do for me.

But...doing so would mean I'm asking my bridesmaids to spend their Thursday afternoon/night (possibly taking off early from work) with me for the b-day party, Friday night (again might have to leave work early) for the rehearsal, then of course all day Saturday for the wedding and possible Sunday morning for a brunch. That's a lot of time with me, and very little time for themselves. Not to mention that they are throwing me a shower, and a bachelorette party that will take up time and I know they've spent time planning. I don't want them to feel like they are having to do too much, as they will basically be spending four days in a row doing things that are all about me.

Is it too much? Is there a way to gauge if it's too much? I thought about sending an email seeing if they were interested, but I almost feel like they would feel inclined to say yes. My mom keeps saying "but they're your friends!" and that these things are fun, and who wouldn't want to do it. But they are busy adults like me and I don't know that I'd appreciate devoting four straight days to my friend's wedding.

I think if I do decide to do this, we'll go with the girls' night out-type idea, because then they won't have to leave work. I would be willing to substitute this for the bachelorette party, but that has already been planned/things reserved for another day, and the birthday party is really all my mom's idea. I wouldn't even be considering it, but it's something she really wants to do.

I think I will just put it out there and see if they want to go. I mean, it is a night in a limo and free drinks, but I just don't want anyone to feel put out.

Since your mom seems to want to make your birthday a great one, how about you suggest just the two of you doing something? Maybe she can take you to a nice dinner and have some quality mother/daughter time before the craziness of the wedding/married life takes over. I know another night out with your girls would be fun, but I think suggesting doing something with your mom might make her day (granted, I know nothing about you or her).

Also, and this is just me, I know I don't like going out hard on weeknights. Maybe if it's just a dinner (and by the way, is your mom paying for this whole thing?) then the girls would be more inclined to go. It wouldn't take time from work on Thursday and they wouldn't be too tired for work Friday morning. Either way, have a fab birthday and wedding day!