Don't wear your ering to a job interview?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@nattiejeanne:  I’ve had this debate with myself a lot recently.  I’m job hunting and getting married in October.  I wouldn’t classify my ring as huge but it’s a good size for my finger size.  It sparkles a LOT.  I’m really not sure if I’ll be removing it for interviews or not…

On one hand, I don’t want to work somewhere that bases the decision on that.

On the other, I’d do pretty much anything for another job right now haha!

Post # 4
Member
1646 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I honestly had never heard this before coming to the Bee. I’m sure there will be people who won’t hire you solely for that reason, but of course there will always be people who will hire you based on your skills and experience and not that you do or don’t have a ring. It’s never hindered me and I have had two jobs since being engaged. In fact, I think it helped with the second and most recent job.

Post # 5
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@nattiejeanne:  I’ve been taking my 1ct equiv moissy off during interviews. I’m not so worried about the size but about the idea they might think I’d be distracted planning my wedding. 

Post # 6
Member
6891 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Better safe than sorry.  I’d remove the engagement ring for an interview.  

Post # 7
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would never wear mine to an interview and I probably won’t until I’m in my 30s at least.  Reasons:

  1. I’m 24, which is definitely “young bride” territory in my area of specialization.  “Young bride” comes with a lot of stereotypes.  I definitely don’t want employers getting all judgey about my life choices or think that I’m not a good cultural fit for their organization.
  2. I don’t want employers wondering if I’m going to prioritize family responsibilities.  I don’t want them wondering about family at all, in fact. Academia is not known to be particularly accomodating to women with family responsibilities.
  3. I don’t want employers to think that my ability to accept a job offer is conditional upon my husband being able to relocate (which it totally is).  I have a two body problem, and I don’t need anyone wondering about it.
  4. My ring is not overwhelmingly modest (1ct equiv moissanite).

Post # 9
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@nattiejeanne:  I feel like, they are going to learn your engagement soon after your employed… Why not be upfront about it? I think it would be decieving to not wear it to the interview, then show up wearing it when training or even after training… 

 

Post # 10
Member
1289 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I had never heard of this before joining The Bee, and at that point I was employed at my job until I left to have a baby. I am now married, but I don’t think I would have worn my ering on an interview during my engagement stage now that I have been “enlightened”. I don’t agree with it, but it makes sense. I guess.

Post # 12
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@nattiejeanne:  It depends on your field and what women in your field do about rings. In my field, people wear wedding bands only or smaller than 2/3 carat engagement rings. Only a few people wear larger engagement rings. If you came in with a double halo, 2 ct equ stone, people would wonder. Not judge, but wonder. I don’t want people thinking about jewelry during my interview, so I would have taken it off if I was interviewing with people who don’t know me (and my ring) already. 

In my husband’s field, they wouldn’t bat an eye at my ring and I would feel fine wearing a flashy, 2+ ct ring there. His average salary is around my office’s average salary. It is all about what you do and how wealth is displayed in your field. 

Post # 13
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@nattiejeanne:  oh it’s totally unfair. But they do it to married women too. “Oh she’s young and married. She’s probably just going to get pregnant and never come back to work.” That’s the reason they can’t legally ask questions about your personal life, so they look for clues. 

Post # 14
Member
279 posts
Helper bee

@nattiejeanne:  This is has been discussed as a topic many times. I think it depends on the type of job you are applying/interviewing in-what field you are in, if you are going to be required to travel, etc.  I won’t wear mine because I am applying for an engineering degree. 

Post # 15
Member
525 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MexiPino:  An older classmate of mine (with 3 kids) actually told me to take my ring off for that reason – she said they will see that I am young and soon to be married (or married) and be thinking that my next logical step after securing an income is to have children so they may pass me over if it is between me and someone else who doesn’t appear to be starting a family.

She was actually not hired back on as a teacher because she had just gotten back on from maternity leave from her first child to resign her contract – she knows from hearing from her old coworkers that the reason she was denied to be signed back on as a teacher is because her boss suspected she’d be having another child soon!

Post # 16
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I considered not wearing it on interviews, but then considered that I would wear it to the job should I get it. I don’t want to interview for a position without my engagement ring and then show up when I start with it on. I feel like that sort of deception would be noticable and reflect poorly on myself.

FWIW, I do have a larger engagement ring that sparkles a lot and has been commented on in a professional setting before. If a potential employer chooses to make the decision not to hire me based on my engaged status, then I’m not sure I’d want to work for them. 

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