Reception (Second) Dress?
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Dress Anxiety!!!

posted 4 months ago in Dress

 
1.
Member
209 posts
Helper bee
baffled111     Walla Walla WA

Hi all,

I have serious dress anxiety. When we first got engaged, I fell in love with a picture of the Allure dress below. I tried on about 3 dresses and then ordered the Allure dress without having the opportunity to try it on (no one carried it). It was more expensive than I wanted it to be, but I thought it would be worth it because the cut is so flattering for me and the lace is soft and romantic and a little bit vintagey. 

Ever since the dress arrived and I was able to try it on, however, I've been having serious doubts and second thoughts. It's a beautiful dress and I think I am going to look beautiful in it (once I get it back from the seamstress). But it is SO MUCH DRESS. It's so wedding dressy, which is not what I wanted and I'm worried I'm not going to feel comfortable in it. 

I was just cheating on my dress at nordstrom.com and saw the adorable BCBG strapless applique dress and it is SO ME. I think I would be so much more comfortable in this dress and it feels more appropriate for the kind of wedding we're having and etc etc. 

However, I have already sunk $1500 into the Allure dress and it is being altered and I know it will be beautiful and that my mum would kill me if I tried to change dresses at this point and I just don't know what to do. 

Help! I wish I had spent more time dress shopping or had looked at lots of dresses before I picked one but...

Attachments

  1. BCBG_dres.jpg (12.8 KB, 16 downloads) 4 months old
  2. allure8634f.jpg (35.3 KB, 13 downloads) 4 months old
 
2.
Bee Icon
Bee
1,108 posts
Bumble bee
trailmix     

Personally, I LOVE the Allure dress and I think you should stick with that.  I think in 30 years when you look back on your wedding, you'll be happy you chose a classic, elegant silhouette...Not to say that the BCBG dress isn't adorable, bc it is but I think your original dress is much more classic and will stand the test of time...

 
3.
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee
alundberg   6/12/10  Raleigh, NC/Minneapolis, MN

Can you afford both? The easy answer is to have the Allure dress as your ceremony dress and the BCBG as your reception dress. :) It's your day and you deserve to have whichever dress is going to make you happy and feel the most beautiful!! Good luck with a tough decision!!!

 
4.
Hostess
4,236 posts
Honey bee
Mrs. DG   July 18th, 2009  Seattle/Tahoe

I agree with rungurl- The allure will stand the test of time.  The BCBG, while very cute, is also very now.  It's a fun dress, but there is nothing classically beautiful about it.  It would make a fabulous reception dress, but barring that, I say go with your first instict-- the Allure.

Best of luck, either way you'll look beautiful!

 
5.
Member
1,056 posts
Bumble bee
JoesWifey   May 24th, 2009  NYC/Wedding in Indiana

I absolutely love love LOVE the Allure dress! My sister and I were looking at wedding dresses last night and I saw that one and nearly swooned. It's absolutely gorgeous and amazing and I SO would have bought that dress for myself had I seen it before my wedding. You're very lucky!! There will be a lot of opportunties to wear a dress like the 2nd one, but this is your only chance to wear a dress as amazing as that Allure gown! Maybe buy the 2nd one for the reception, and you could always try to sell the Alllure one after the wedding. I'm seriously so jealous!

 
6.
Member
953 posts
Busy bee
hhcheung2000     San Diego, CA

Trust me...all girls have dress anxiety.  I honestly bought another dress and really regretted it because the first dress I initially bought turned out 100 times better than the second dress.  Now I think I'll have to sell the second one.  But it took $1000 to realize that!

 
7.
Member
216 posts
Helper bee
mandalee0624     

I loveeeeeee the Allure gown and think you should stick w/ it for the ceremony and pictures, which last forever (unless you're okay w/ all of your wedding photos of you in a non-formal gown). Then, for your reception change into the dress you feel expresses you best! BUT!... either way, do not end up regretting the decision!

 
8.
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Member
173 posts
Blushing bee
coralray24   09/26/2009  Tucson, AZ

Everyone has dress anxiety, but usually the first choice is the best...I think looking back through the photos you would be happier with a more formal dress.  The BCBG dress is cute, but I think the Allure is better.

 
9.
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Bee
1,108 posts
Bumble bee
trailmix     

Ooh, another option...if you can somehow afford both, you could wear the BCBG one to your rehearsal dinner!

 
10.
Member
209 posts
Helper bee
baffled111     Walla Walla WA

Thanks everyone. I really do love the Allure dress, but it is SOOO dressy. I know it will look beautiful though. Much of my problem is with the train. I think trains are kind of stupid (no offense to those who like them!!) and I wanted to have the seamstress remove it, but it was going to be far too expensive. So it's being bustled which isn't really the line I would like and etc, etc.

Still, the more I think about it, the more I think I should look for a little reception cocktail dress. I can't imagine spending a whole night dancing and carousing in that giant dress. It just seems, um, over-indulgent to have 2 dresses for a relatively small and informal wedding. 

Thanks again for the help. :) 

 
11.
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
mismikado   5/29/2010  Texas

I think you should definitely consider have 2 dresses and you can always sell the allure one after the wedding.

 
12.
Member
331 posts
Helper bee
MrsWoohoo   01/02/09  Bay Area, CA

The allure dress is gorgeous! But if you don't feel comfortable in it, maybe you should talk it out with your mom and see if you could wear the BCBG dress during the recption. It's definitely a dress you could wear again (unlike the Allure). Either way, I'm sure you'll look beautiful.

 
13.
Hostess
1,385 posts
Bumble bee
august15bride   August 15, 2009  St. Petersburg, FL

I absolutely love that Allure dress. If I had found it before I bought mine, it probably would be my dress! It is gorgeous and so classic. It is completely natural to have second thoughts. Heaven knows I have! :)

 
14.
Member
346 posts
Helper bee
Ms Mini   July 17, 2010  Calgary, AB

I LOVE the allure dress (it is the one I think I will end up buying) I think it is awesome.

 
15.
Member
787 posts
Busy bee
futuredrbraun   May 15, 2010  Indianapolis, IN

I have to agree with everyone that the Allure dress is amazing!!! I don't think that you would have ANY trouble selling it if you end up changing your mind and going with the cocktail dress. However, if you are having the dress bustled, I really don't think that it is "too much" or really all that dressy at all. It's not big and poofy and there isn't a lot of bling stuff on it so I think that you will be fine.

Definitely trust your instincts and do what will make YOU happy. If you want the cocktail dress and that is more of your style then go for it!!!

 

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