Post # 1
I am having a very small wedding (20 people aprox) in just under 4 weeks. Initially I told my sister (my only BM) to just wear a dress she has from a previous (and much more formal wedding.) I have since decided to have a tea-length dress to keep with the theme of less formal, vintage, outdoors, etc… I hadn’t given much thought to it, but I think its going to look silly with her in a formal floor length gown and me in my vintage style tea length dress. The groom and Bridesmaid or Best Man with be in tuxs (long tie not bowtie) which will look fine with my dress but I think with all 3 of them “formal” and me in a fun tea-length I am going to look out of place at my own wedding. I am in full panic attack mode right now. I talked to my sister this morning and she doesn’t want to have her dress shortened. She said she would pick up a simple short dress in the same color but then said she was getting frustrated once she started thinking about it. Now I am online shopping for a new wedding dress for myself to keep the peace. WTF? I knew we should have eloped… I am going to attach pictures of both dresses and you can see how they would look together… Please help.
Post # 3
@KendraKat: umm… it’s YOUR wedding, why should you have to change YOUR dress for her? you look great in it! i have a tea length dress and my girls are in knee length ones for the same reason you said. i say just help her pay for a new, shorter dress instead. she can easily get something on sale – i got an email from DB that they’re having a bridesmaid dress sale right now – try them or the mall!
Post # 4
If she’s up for it, see if she could get her dress hemmed to knee length. It will be much cheaper than getting a new dress (probably under $50), and you could even offer to help pay if you want.
Post # 5
Also, LOVE your dress – you look great 🙂
Post # 6
I agree with @elliestan: it is your wedding so you should decide what dress you want to wear and then decide what style of dress your Bridesmaid or Best Man should wear. I think she does have a right to express her frustration since she now has four weeks to alter her dress or get a new one, but you should just apoligise for changing your mind but be firm and make sure she does hem the dress or get a new one.
Post # 7
Buy her a Bridesmaid or Best Man new dress, rather than getting a new wedding dress. Cheap, easy, done.
Post # 8
Thanks ladies, that was just what I needed to hear. I asked that she buy a new dress that she likes, my only request is that it is around knee-length and the same color as the previous one. I told her I would be happy to help her pay for it. If she had bought the long dress originally for my wedding, I would certainly not expect her to buy another one. But since she bought it 3 years ago for a friends wedding, I don’t think its too much to ask she buys a new one for her only sisters wedding where she will be the maid-of-honor (actually the only BM!) Thanks for your thoughts and opinions. I do love my dress, it is just what I wanted, so I am glad my plans to find a new one were quickly squashed 😉
Post # 9
I LOVE you in your dress – DO NOT buy a new wedding dress! I think it’s more than reasonable to ask her to shorten the one she has (and honestly, it looks like it could be easily done) or buy another dress.