- 3 years ago
Hi ladies! I’ve been lurking here for a bit now, pretty much reading eveyrone’s “dress regret” posts, and I’m glad to know I’m not the only one! But… I guess I’ll start at the beginning.
When I got engaged (literally THE DAY I got engaged) I laid down the edict that I would only be going dress shopping with my mother. I have seen SYTTD, I know how what happens when you show up with 2934 people. Cut to a couple of weeks later, and I caved (because people in my family were super mad at me for that) and allowed other people to come dress shopping.
I had always envisioned myself in an all lace gown – a sheath or fit to flare style, with a full back (I have some scars I’m self-concious of), train, and a little sleeve. Every single dress I’ve ever pinned to Pinterest was a lace sheath or fit to flare with a train and sleeves of some sort.
While trying on gowns my mom, my mom’s best friend, and 1 of my sisters all didn’t like the gowns I was pulling. I tried on an Allure (looks similar to the 9068 – I’m not sure if it was that exact one of not, as I’m not sure if that style was out yet) and fell in love and had my crying moment – but everyone else was kind of just like “meh.” I then tried on one that my mom’s best friend had pulled (the Allure 8850) and everyone had THEIR crying moment, and said it was “exactly the dress they always pictures me in.” (Note: my fiance had also told me in the past that he liked gowns that looked “a little puffy” because they seemed more traditional to him, so I wasn’t forced to try on that style against my will or anything – I was totally willing and excited to see how I would look in something that he said that he might prefer… I just didn’t prefer it, lol.)
The Allure 8850 is a gorgeous dress but: it’s not a sheath or fit to flare, and it’s strapless. My biiigest thing that I did not want was a strapless gown.
So – I allowed myself to get caught up in the moment of feeling super pretty and having everyone else think I looked super pretty and I bought the dress. This was on a Sunday. Two days later on Tuesday I called the cancel it (without telling anyone) and the shop said it was too late as they had already placed the order. I decided to wait until my gown came in and I had tried on my ACTUAL gown, with shoes and my veil, before making any rash decisions. In the meantime I decided I would have sleeves added to my gown. The seamstress told me it would cost a ton of money, and they sold me on the Maggie Sottero capelet that goes with the Chesney gown (http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?style=4MS853JK&page=0&pageSize=36&keywordText=jacket) for $500.
Cut to two weeks ago and MY dress (the Allure 8850) came in, and I went to have a fitting. We ordered it one size up with the intention of taking it in and – guess what – they ordered the wrong size, so it needed to be let out. And everything went down hill from there. I had been convincing myself that once it was MY dress I would put it on and love it – but I didn’t. Actually, at that moment I hated it. They let it out that night and the next day I tried it on and it fit – but it was so uncomfortable. Incredibly heavy, the boning was so tight I could barely breathe, etc. And I just felt… I don’t know. Kind of frumpy? It’s a beautiful gown – but it doesn’t feel like ME. It feels like a gown that I would look at some other girl and say “Oh how pretty!” But when I see myself in it I say, “Oh … why are you wearing some other girl’s dress?”
And since that day I’ve been having SERIOUS dress regret. A couple of days ago I went into the bridal shop on my own, without telling anyone, and tried on some lace sheaths and fit to flares. And – of course – I fell in love with the 9068, which I’m 99% positive is the dress I had my crying moment with originally.
Then I did something I REALLY regret. I showed my fiance pictures of me in both gowns. I know, I KNOW! I didn’t want him to see me before hand, but I thought “Okay, if he tells me which one he likes better then I can make a decision knowing that he will be so happy to see me walking down the aisle.” And he said that while he loves the back on the 9068 (and I mean, how could you not – it’s breathtaking) he thinks the 8850 is more traditional and it’s what he always envisioned me in. (He also said he doesnt like it w/ the Chesney capelet, and neither do I honestly. It looks – with the 8850 – like something a grandma would wear for a fancy dinner out.) But I regret showing him because now it’s like “well no matter what I do, I killed the surprise and I can’t get that moment back.”
And now I’m stuck. I feel like such a selfish spoiled little brat for wanting another dress, especially after my mom paid for the Allure 8850 (and I paid the $500 for the Chesney capelet). I don’t feel like me in the 8850, but that’s the one my family and my fiance like. But *I* don’t feel like that’s the dress for me. But I am annoying myself just for feeling like this! Because this is so, so not me.<br /><br />
- This topic was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by ce0604.