Weddingbee boards

I ordered my dress from a shop that refers you to a local seamstress. I measured as just above a size 10, so they said I was about a size 12 and should order a size 14 to be safe. I was SO confused, but I figured it could just be taken in and I wouldn't have to worry about it being snug anywhere, so I took thier advice and ordered the 14. Since then I have lost about 7 pounds. The dress is Alfred Angelo 1142 in ivory/gold... and I got it with a discount from the store so it was about $350 or so.

 The area I live in has a lot of wealthy/snobby people and I feel like my seamstress isn't interested in my dress because it isn't as expensive or impressive as the dresses she usually works on. (She also lectures me about my weight, and lectures my stepdaughter and me about how we speak/live/act etc, she's offensive) It's huge on my hips IMO and it makes me look wide, and when I first tried it on for my fitting it fell to the floor if I didn't hold it up. She said she didn't want to take in the sides except for in the bust because it would be too much work, and said it was even too tight in the hips! I thought I looked like I was wearing a sack...

So anyhoo yesterday I went to the shop where my sister and mom are getting their dresses and broke down and told my mom about how bad I feel about myself in my dress. She told the lady working there and they referred me to their seamstress and helped me pick out a reception (white bridesmaid's) dress that was really flattering on me, in a size 10 which confirmed for me that a size 14 is just too big in the hips.

Can I change seamstresses at this point in the game?? My wedding is in a month and I dunno how to pick up this dress without offending my original seamstress who's part way through altering my dress and stepdaughter's dress. I don't know how to say nicely "You won't do what I want, you make me feel fat and I'm taking this dress elsewhere, but please still finish my JBM's dress for me." I also don't know how much I would have to pay this woman for what she has done so far...

Should I just leave well enough alone and wear the dress as it is? I'm a little worried it's not a good idea to start alterations somewhere else at this point. The only thing is that this other shop/seamstress are so nice, helpful and honest and have done an amazing job on my mom and sister's dresses.

"I appreciate your professional opinion on the fit of my dress, however I've been referred to a seamstress to tends to specialize in plus-sized brides, and I'd like to see what she suggests"

How about that?

Thanks so much I needed someone to smack some sense into me!!

@MissNoodles: I like that idea, I'm not plus sized, in street clothes I am a 6 or 8, usually a medium in most stores... so that wouldn't exactly work... HOWEVER, she did say that the little lace appliques would be too much work, so I could definitely say I found someone who specializes in lace, I love it!

@bakerella: I don't know what I owe her and to be honest I'm afraid she'll charge me for all the alterations even though she told me she would not be "finishing" the seams until a couple weeks before the wedding. So what I will be picking up is my dress with unfinished seams and the appliques she took off from the bust and is waiting to put back on.

I agree that it's her job to make it flattering on me and to do the alterations I asked for, I guess I didn't realize until now that even though she's the one doing the work, I'm really the one making the decisions.

Thank you guys so much!!!!

@Moja Milosc: Youre a 6/8 and they had you order a FOURTEEN??  I'm a 6/8 as well and I fit rignt into a bridal 10, no alterations needed. You mist be SWIMMING in that dress!  ANyway, what you said about the appliques is a good excuse, NOT that you need an excuse to take your dress elsewhere, but you dont need the drama of a big confrontation so thats an easy out.