Weddingbee boards

Epic thanks for those of you who commented on this post and helped me figure out how to make myself look more like a buff bride, less like a linebacker in lace.  (I am such a sucker for alliteration).  Oh, man, that advice about sweetheart necklines and lower backs was awesome.

Now I'm totally torn... my favorite in pictures wasn't even one of my favorites in the store because I didn't like the tafetta fabric.

I love the way the bodice looks, and the deep sweetheart neckline is AWESOME (even if I am making a face)

My favorite from that store was actually a much less drastic fit and flare:

The fabric is WAY nicer (satiny silk that flows really well vs. tafetta), but I love the extreme fit and flare look of the first one.

OR there's the totally different lace option...  would have to add a sweetheart neckline here... the back is higher though which I don't like, but it's a fantastically pretty lace.

Then there was another mermaid/trumpet option which was in a nicer fabric, but didn't have the same flattering, ruched bodice.  It looks a little bubble-hemmed because the sample was in bad shape.

Ack!  I am pretty sure another big trip is in order since so many of these are close-but-no-cigar (tafetta on a great bodice, gorgeous lace but too high a back), but if you've read this far, please let me know your favorites.

@divergirl: Thanks - yeah I really love the way it looks on me.  The look on my face is actually because my friend was giving me very specific instructions on how to stand, which I thought was hilarious.  My concern with this one, and why I liked the other one better, is that it's tafetta and I really don't like that fabric... though part of why I want opinions is to see if I should try again / open my mind to tafetta / see if I can find something similar in a different fabric.

BTW, I just saw your dress pic and it's gorgeous.  I love the beading and it looks great on you.

@tarheelgrad98: I don't recall the first one being hard to walk in though if I do go back to try it on again I will have to pay attention to that.  But the drape was really nice on the second one.

@In the media:  Aw, thanks!  Hahahha, I am pretty sure my parents don't read weddingbee and my grandma refuses to use a computer, so I think you're good. ;)  I'm SO happy with the way that one looks on me, I'm just concerned because I don't really like the fabric.  And also my friend at work told me it was the most formal of the dresses... I see it as more fun than formal though.

Thanks for all the feedback!  This is super helpful in narrowing down my thoughts.

@tracieszcz: I think you're right - I couldn't remember which dress was which designer, so I did a little looking up and I am nearly positive dress 1 is Paloma Blanca 4054 (unless it is a Mikaella with a flower detail removed) which looks exactly the same but in silk on their website.  I am going to call the store where I tried it on and ask about fabrics.

@aprose: and@anuicupcake: and @emmalina: yeah, I worry about it looking dated as well... so many dresses that I love on me end up feeling a little bit '80s.  and I hate the 80's... but I love the way the first one looks - it's so much more exciting than the second.

@Prewitt: Thanks again for helping me out before.  The sweetheart necklines and also the lower back which someone else suggested did wonders.  Apparently the idea is to be counter-intuitive and reveal as much as possible... except the ruching which does a great job with stomach insecurities! ;)

@MrsGou: I think I have two follow up questions for the salons - if the first dress comes in silk and if adding a corset to the lace one (which I already asked about) would/could lower the back.  The high straight back really does not work so well for me.  It's such a fantastic, drapey lace.

Oh, and I never mentioned any details about my wedding - it'll be mid-afternoon to wee hours of the morning in September in Northern California.  So probably warmish but not hot or humid, and semi-formal, a vaguely rustic feel.  Basically our theme is drinking alcohol and having a big party.  Me being style-clueless, I can't even decide which dresses are more or less formal.

100% the first one,no question.

@kitzy: That's a good point about the alterations... I can't remember positively, but I am pretty sure the tafetta one was my size whereas the silk was a couple sizes larger.

@irin997: Thanks. I don't know how much bling I can pull off before I go running for my sweatpants!  The lace fabric I tried is so gorgeous and has sparkle, but it's so much more feminine than I am.  The sweethearts do help a ton... that is my other qualm with the silk dress - the neckline barely has any dip to it.  By the way, the way you felt about about ballgowns is how I ended up with the mermaid cuts!

@MissBoston: Thank you!  I liked that one more in person which is why I'm so surprised and confused that I now like the first one more in pictures.

@tracieszcz: You're right that it's a less formal fabric which maybe I should look for... since I'm also considering getting something tea length (but can't find anything I like!) I really don't want to end up with something that says evening ballroom wedding.  Where in Northern California are you getting married?

@topaz925:  Thanks.  It's a really amazing lace in person, and I love the way it drapes.  But you're right... the back would definitely need to be lowered and at that point it might end up being too many changes...

@pb and j: LOL!  Well you do have plenty of time.  On one hand, I'm tempted to get the shopping done before the rush of holiday engagements, and so I can start thinking about what my bridesmaids will wear.  But I'm also worried that it's too early to make a decision and I'll end up agonizing and changing my mind.

@tracieszcz: I keep going back and forth on if I even want an actual wedding dress, but I feel like so many of them are so flattering compared to the off the rack stuff I try on that I am going to have to bite the bullet.  I did look at bridesmaid dresses available in white, but the ones I've seen are all way too plain.

Also - your dress looks like it may be more than very, very similar to the first one... it looks pretty much exactly the same.  What style is it?  I had thought that the first one was a Paloma Blanca (4045) but that one is in silk on the website so I may have identified it wrong (and I can't remember what it said on the tag).

@j.andrews.bridal: Thanks!  Yeah, looking back I'm getting super confused.  I know that store carried Paloma Blanca (they may have had a very similar Paloma Blanca and Mikaella, one of which I tried on...) so it might have been it or it might have been a tafetta version of it.  Am going to call them back this week and figure it out, since I know Paloma Blanca 4054 is almost exactly the same cut and in silk.  In which case... it may be the one.

@tracieszcz: Thanks.  I actually don't remember exactly how much it was - it wasn't my favorite until later when I started looking at the pictures.  Very little at that salon was over 1500 and everything was under 2k, so I think it was in the 1000-1500 range.  Was yours significantly more or less (if you don't mind sharing)? 

@LilMermaid: Thanks. 

@Cash000:  The woman at that shop left me a vm saying they can switch it to a corset back for $250.  I'm going to ask if that can include lowering the back.  She definitely seemed to be trying to talk me out of any dresses that required significant alternations to their structure, but those may be easy to do at the same time.

@tracieszcz: OK, thanks!  I have a plan.  It involves waiting until there are fewer people in the office, but I am going to call the store that had the first two and ask about dress 1- find out if it's available in silk and what the cost is.  If it's way more expensive, I may try to track down yours somewhere (it looks like a place in San Jose carries that line).  I'm also going to ask about the lace dress and if a corset back would lower the back.

I think there's at least a couple more shopping trips in my future - I'm so undecided right now that I feel like I need to see a few more options to see what I think about these, and to revisit the tea length idea I was so attached to a few months ago. I've also showed these pictures to my fiance (we're not very traditional) and I suspect he may have a preference he is hiding.

So I guess the answer is I know what I am going to do, but I still don't know what dress to choose.

@JennaBride: Thanks!  It's so funny - when I was looking at venues I was obsessed with everyone's venue threads.  Now that I'm looking at dresses I get so excited about new dress pictures and posts.  The one way later down may or may not be the same dress as #1 (I think it's a different designer but the same silhouette) - it's actually tracieszcz looking awesome in her dress.