Post # 1
Hi ladies, we are really close to sealing the deal on our favorite venue… looking at one more just in case, but it’s pretty much decided on this place up the central coast of California – 5 1/2 hrs drive (or 1 hr flight) from where we live).
My family is all from the east coast, but the majority of my friends are in southern CA (I moved around schools alot in my youth, but I’ve lived here 10 yrs). FI’s friends and familly are all over the state, but mostly southern CA. Thus, it was going to be “destination” for my family regardless…but now if we choose this place, it’ll be a hefty drive for most.
My mom thinks it’s asking alot for people to have a hotel room for one night. But we almost always get a hotel room after a wedding anyway unless it’s like 20 min from home, so I don’t think something driveable that you could do with one hotel night is that bad. Also our wedding will be 6pm-midnight, so they can drive in that day if they want.
I’m wondering what to plan for in decline rate??? It’s a far away destination for 10% of our guests, it’s a 5 1/2 hour drive (or short flight) for about 70%, 7-8 hour drive for 10% of our guests, and it’s fairly local for about 10%.
Post # 3
Choose the place you want and count on 100% attendance. I think you’re right, I almost always stay the night after a wedding.
Post # 4
I think one night in a hotel is not asking too much at all. I think your RSVP decline rate would be less then say that of a destination wedding where guests would have to stay for days and take a plane there
Post # 5
One night in a hotel is not asking too much. But I agree with futuremrsfitz18 that you should plan on a 0% decline rate. I’ve seen way too many Bees count on a certain decline rate only to have everyone accept.
Post # 6
I think you will be surprised by how many RSVP yes!! its definitly not too far and most people get a hotel room for at least a night when attending a wedding 🙂
Post # 7
You must do what’s best for you. If they really want to be there, then they will not mind staying over night & it may even be a good get-away for them also. You must plan the wedding for you. I say that if they “really” want to be a part of your special day they will come no matter how far it is. So I would not worry about it, I say give them plenty of notice at least 6 months to save up for a room & flight. You don’t want to give them a 2-3 month notice, they may need more time & you want to be considerate of their finances if they have to purchase flights. This way if they have have ample notice they can save up for a room & flight. So go ahead & plan your wedding where YOU want!
Post # 8
I live in the Bay Area and most of our guests live there, too. We are getting married in Santa Barbara. We have guests attending from all over California, some from Texas, Florida, New Jersey, even Germany and one from Mozambique! People will attend if they can. We invited 161 and have 134, so about 83% are coming. I’d also count on a 0% decline rate because you never know.
Just out of curiousity, if you don’t mind sharing, which venue are you thinking about? My FI is from San Luis Obispo and I looked at pretty much every venue on the Central Coast before I ended up changing tracks and going with Santa Barbara because we fell in love with a venue.
Post # 9
Our wedding venue is on the southern coast of BC. We have people attending who are: driving upto 16 hours then taking one ferry, flying from the same distance and taking a ferry, driving for 2 hours and taking 2 ferries, and even flying from England and paying for hotels and ferries.
We invited 116 people, on 56 invitations. We have a final confirmed number of 71 people including FI and myself, so a 61% acceptance rate (we set our date well in advance, and sent out invitations out in January for a September wedding since EVERYONE will need to book time off, travel, and hotel rooms).
So for those coming: 9 are flying from England, and about half of the rest of coming from 15+ hours away by car, and half just the couple hours’ drive and the ferries. It all turned out pretty equally. So I can’t say that a farther travel distance = less people coming.
We were expecting about 40-50 total guests and were just blown away that we’ll have 70 for a DW. It’s amazing….and we feel really blessed. I think a large factor in our large amount of acceptances was the fact that we told everyone where we’d be marrying for the last couple of years, and then followed that up with VERY early invitations to give people plenty of time to plan.
Post # 10
@BettyKnocker: Pasadera Country Club http://pasadera.com in Monterey, guests will stay in Carmel & Carmel Valley.
I’m considering over-inviting just on my side… FI’s side is 95% from CA/west coast, and my side is about 60% west coast, 40 % east coast. Also his side is 75% family and 25% friends, but mine is the opposite. I’m guessing decline rate is higher amongst friends than family…
Post # 11
- Wedding: October 2014 - Disney
I’d plan for a 0% decline rate as others have stated. I’m doing a destination wedding we will send out about 50 invitations. We expect a decline rate because some of those are curteous invitations and we know those family members do not have the ability to travel due to health reasons they would have declined a wedding local to us as well. We expect 40-45 return rate which without those curteous invites will be 100%.
Edited to add if those curteous invitations are accepted we will be over joyed to have them. However I fully realise they are not able to do that kind of travel but wish they could hence we send invites. They’d actually do a longer travel to come see us in our home state.
Post # 12
I think you need to be PREPARED for everyone to accept, but you can make reasonable plans with a certain decline rate. That really depends on so many factors, and I think you have to go through your own guest list and make a yes/no/maybe (and take into consideration guests or not). You’ll be wrong on some of them, but they’ll likely balance each other out.
We’re inviting 250, but I am expecting about 150 to actually come. I know that seems like a huge decline rate, but we’re inviting a fair number of coworkers (out of state), at least 10 of parents’ friends (also out of state), and it is at a minimum 2.5 hours away from everyone. Plus, in that 250 number, everyone has a +1, but realistically (having been to weddings with a lot of these people), I could guess who was likely to actually bring one.
I’ve run the numbers a bunch of different ways and pretty much always land between 140 and 160. I’m making plans based on that (# of centerpieces, budget, etc). We COULD accommodate everyone if some crazy freak thing happened and everyone accepted (SO not happening… great aunt in a nursing home on the other side of the country is not coming – and definitely not bringing a guest), but we’d have to change our seating plans and obviously up our budget.
It just is really unique to each situation. To say you should plan for 100% acceptance is a little crazy – you should be able to acommodate it, but to plan for it probably means you’re going to have a lot of empty space. Plan for a number that is realistic once you do few different sample RSVP lists, and have a backup plan for if substantially more or less accept. Just like if you were doing an outdoor wedding – you plan for what you think will happen, but you have a rain backup 🙂