Driving myself crazy about timing

posted 3 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

@fallingleaves:  I wanted a baby a full year before we got to TTC. It was AWFUL!

I kept passing dates on the calendar and going “This could be my baby’s birthday next year” or “six more months…”

That being said, I wouldn’t worry about your big family event… My SIL brought her 7 WEEK old baby to a MASSIVE family reunion. Everyone was fine!

Post # 4
Member
728 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I am a teacher so I wanted to have my baby some time between March and June. I was so obsessed before we started TTC with trying the figure out all the times when I would be ovulating to give us a due date between there. It really stressed me out. Then we started trying and got KU the first try. I’m due March 30th. 5 months of stress for nothing. 

Post # 5
Member
2114 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@fallingleaves:  It all goes out the window if you don’t meet your timeframe….we just got our BFP early this week and had to cancel lots of plans for next spring/summer….life goes on, and baby is on it’s way.

Post # 6
Member
1901 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@fallingleaves:  I know how you feel! I work on a television show 7 months out of the year and I’m trying to plan TTC around that. Its frustrating.

Post # 7
Member
2602 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Oh my gosh, you and I are totally in the same boat! My brother is getting married in California the third week in September. I do NOT want to miss their wedding because I am too pregnant to fly (or because I’m like, in labor)! So I gotta conceive in the next couple of months, then we would sit out December and January, probably, so I wouldn’t be super preggo, then get back to it in February. I don’t want to want until February! Making things even worse is we might miss Oct and maybe even November as well GAAAAAH! I am going on a sweet girls’ trip to Mallorca in October and I’m pretty sure I’ll ovulate on the trip- dammit. Then I might travel for work in November, and ovulate while away from my husband again. Sigh.

Post # 8
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I loving planning and organizing and really tried to figure out the BEST time for my husband and I to have a child.  But, life does not always work as planned.  You may get KU the first month or it may take many months.  There are some things you can do (health lifestyle, chart cycles, OPKs, etc.), but when you get KU is, in many ways, outside of your control. 

My husband and I are in our mid-20’s and are healthy.  We have now been TTC for >6 months.  I recently started a new job, so it might make sense logically to stop TTC for a few months, but once you decide to grow your family (especially if you were wanting this for a while before TTC), it is really hard to stop trying.  I personally wouldn’t put TTC on hold for a family event.  There will always be something in life that is conflicting with your TTC timeline.  But that’s just my experience.

Post # 9
Member
6274 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@fallingleaves:  i wanted to be 3 months pregnant walking down the ailse, but FI said no.  we agreed.  we are going to italy for our honeymoon and i also want to eat and drink my way through.

you can’t really plan and time the baby, you just have to let it happen.  something will always come up.

if i got pregnant right away, i would be due in July.  FI’s family has their huge family reunion at one of the cousin’s lake house.  it’s pretty awesome. i’ve gone the last 2 years as girlfriend, then fiance. and look forward to it every year as does he. if i was 8 or 9 months pregnant, we would miss it this year. i’m not going to hold off on TTC because there will always be something i might miss.

 

Post # 10
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@fallingleaves:  We wanted to wait until we got a house and dog. Once we accomplished that, we wanted to wait for fall. For what reason we had no idea. Then it was, “Well, if we have a baby then I can’t go on your choir tour in June.” So we would have had to wait for that. We ended up pregnant, and now I can’t go on that choir tour, and honestly, now that I am pregnant, I really don’t crae because this baby is way more important than going on a fun trip to Chicago.

Moral of my story, we waited thinking next month would be better or waiting so we wouldn’t interfere with anything coming up, but honestly if we had truly waited until after this choir tour next June, it still wouldn’t have been a good time because next fall we want to go on another trip. There is never a perfect time, and you really have to push that from your mind if you want a child badly enough. However, there is absolutely NO shame in waiting so you don’t have to miss out on future trips. Do what is best for you.

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