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Dropout BM + One Month to Go = Heartbroken Bride

posted 1 year ago in Bridesmaids
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    1.
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    383 posts
    Helper bee
    LittleOctopus    October 10, 2010   Raleigh, NC

    Okay, I need some hive lovin'.  My poor darling fiance just doesn't know what to do with my sobbing self and I don't know exactly what I need to hear...but I just know you ladies can help me out.

    One of my bridesmaids just called to tell me that not only can she not be a bridesmaid, but she can't even come to the wedding.  She got transferred to England for work and told her bosses that she needed time off for the wedding, which they agreed to.  Now, they are sending her to Bournemouth for two weeks during our wedding and she can't leave.

    I'm so proud of her for getting this huge opportunity, and I know this wasn't easy for her.  I'm not mad at her at all, just really truly heartbroken that one of my best friends won't be there for our wedding day.

    Anything at all that might help, please.  I'd like to stop crying at some point this evening.

     
    2.
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    Worker bee
    shastahun    September 18, 2010   Tucson, AZ

    I was in the same boat you are in. Not one but two of my bridesmaids dropped out (one was my MOH) around the same time. My MOH was mad that I didn't use her family as photographers for my wedding so she basically told me she wasn't coming and I should find someone else. I was incredibly shocked and hurt, but karma came back and bit her big time.

    Anyways, what got me through it was turning to my other BM's and my FI. They were incredibly supportive and wonderful at telling me exactly what I needed to hear. I know you are heartbroken, but I'm sure you're friend will be with you in spirit and thinking of you on your special day. If you are having a videographer you should make sure to send her a copy of the dvd so she can feel like she was there.

     
    3.
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    Bumble bee
    cyneswith    May 14, 2011   Augusta, GA

    My prospective MOH has to get her citizenship sorted out before she can come back to the states for my wedding.  She's had seven bloody years to do this.  Her husband, though, finally decided to help once I had a prospective wedding date.  While it's both flattering and depressing that I rate WAY above her mom or country to her, it's also nerve wracking that her attendance depends on a boatload of paperwork.  

    Then I found out she's expecting in March.  If the guy proposes when I think he will, I could easily do a May 2011 wedding - but she wouldn't be able to come, whether due to citizenship or her baby.  So (if BF proposes in December) do I put off my wedding for a year so she can come, or do I not have my best friend at my wedding?

    England just does not mix well with bridesmaids.

     
    4.
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    1,955 posts
    Buzzing bee
    pansyshell    October 8, 2010   Central Pa, Wedding in Outer Banks, NC

    @LittleOctopus: I just saw this! I'm so sorry LittleO!!! The same things happened to me several months ago...my MOH backed out because well she simply just didn't feel like doing it. She then promised to come to the wedding anyway but sent her response back declining and never gave me a reason why. But my SIL is now my MOH and everything is good again.

    I'm so sorry your dealing with this as well, but you seem to have a really good outlook on everything. As you said you are happy for her and this oppurtunity. Hold on to that and know that she is not there because she does not want to be but because she cannot and was given a chance to do something awesome...just like you and your FH are doing! Keep your chin up lady, only a few more weeks!

     

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