dry wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Food
Post # 3
Member
2132 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I think the best thing in this situation would be to have a completely dry wedding. You can distract from it by having really good food! And maybe some party games, depending on how your venue’s set up

Post # 4
Member
1500 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@alerose: You’ve got a tough situation.  I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, but the only way you can guarantee that he won’t be super super drunk is to have a dry wedding – but don’t let ANYONE know. If they found out everyone will sneak and prepare drinks beforehand. Have lots of delicious “mocktails” and good food, and activities. Dry weddings don’t tend to have as much dancing especially if one side depends on alcohol to socialize so games help a lot. 

 

 

 

You won’t look cheap by not serving, you have alcoholics in your family that are hard to control, this is more a safety issue than anything else. 

 

Post # 5
Member
8705 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

It’s your wedding. If you don’t want alcohol, don’t have alcohol. I had a completely dry wedding and I swear to you that people get over it and it isn’t the end of the world.

We toasted with sparkling cider. It was wonderful.

Post # 6
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Just have a dry wedding. There’s no reason to side-eye a dry wedding. Have a fun Italian soda or iced tea bar. Toast with sparkling cider, grape juice, or a signature faux cocktail.

Post # 7
Member
11717 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s not the end of the world if you have a dry wedding.  You don’t have to advertise it, though.

On the other hand — be prepared for the atmosphere to change a little.  I, for one, would not be up dancing half the night without liquid courage.  To be honest, I’d probably leave earlier if there was no alcohol option at all. 

Post # 8
Member
641 posts
Busy bee

Have it dry and hire security to bounce the drunks. 

Post # 9
Member
2103 posts
Buzzing bee

@alerose:  Have a dry wedding. Why would you pay for something you don’t even like? When I looked at caterers, I looked at food I liked! I wasn’t about to drop so much money on something I didn’t even like.

Post # 10
Member
1071 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Greenbrier Country Club

Here’s the thing…
You don’t have to explain your wedding decisions to your quests… or anyone for that matter. 😀
Have a dry wedding, toast with Champagne (because you want to…), and not only do you NOT have to explain yourself; you don’t even have to give anyone a heads up. And don’t let people make you think you have to. Just plan your wedding, and enjoy.

Post # 11
Member
11379 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@alerose:  there are other beverages to serve other than alcohol.  sparkling cider, non-alcoholic beers, virgin cocktails (a lot of these still taste the same).

i have been to a few dry weddings due to religion.  both of my parents were raised baptist and half of the family instil those values of not drinking, dancing, gambling, etc.  mind you, the other half of the family makes up for it.  lol.

typically, i would make sure that i catered to the majority of the guests but given the religion and your father’s issue, having a dry wedding would not be a bad idea.  i think if you have good food and offer other great tasting beverages, you should be fine.

fyi, those dry weddings that i did attend, the evening ended very soon after dinner.  usually by 9pm the room was empty.  keep that in mind if you are considering a dj or late night meal.

Post # 12
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I second PP with going with your gut and having the dry wedding. I’m having a dry wedding for religious reasons as well, but you have plenty more reasons to go in this direction. We are prepared as well for the evening to not last a long time, but we’re hoping to have some activities for people to do at the reception. Still, this is very common in our circle of friends, so it’s very expected. It’s probably not expected for the majority of your guests, so I’m thinking there may be other ways for you to get around this.

Are your wedding details set in stone already? What about having the wedding at a different time of day? Yes, I know people drink at all hours of the day 🙂 but it might be less expected if you had a morning wedding/brunch reception, which I’ve seen a few times. I actually saw a friend of a friend’s wedding on Facebook that took place at sunrise. It was gorgeous, unique and everyone loved it. Definitely not traditional if that’s what you had in mind, but it could work! Then you could say, we didn’t think guests would want a lot of alcohol that early in the day, etc. 

Post # 13
Member
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@alerose:  Can you ask your mom or someone to keep your dad under control? Otherwise just have a dry wedding if that’s what you want.

Don’t put it on the invitation, that would be weird. And don’t be surprised if people are disappointed by not having any drinks. I went to a dry wedding once and it was not as fun as if I could’ve had a glass of wine or two. It just feels like juvenile or something to not have any alcohol around, and toasting with sparkling grape juice felt weird too.

Post # 14
Member
1355 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013 - Vine Street Church

We had a dry wedding and not a single person complained. Everyone still had a ton of fun, and the people who wanted to have drinks either came to our house beforehand for mimosas or came to our house afterwards for beers. It was awesome.

Post # 15
Member
357 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Yes, you absolutely can have a dry wedding and it sounds like a good idea in your case.

But as I’m sure you know, a dry wedding will not prevent an alcoholic from being drunk. He can drink plenty before. He can have a flask during. Where there’s a will…

So you may also want to have security that can remove your dad (or anyone else) if they are sneaking alcohol (if they are, this also opens you up to fines from the venue).

Good luck.

Post # 16
Member
8592 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Just have a dry wedding if everyone you know acts like that.  You don’t need to explain it to them.  I’d say you should have a brunch or lunch time reception so people won’t expect partying anyway.  That’s better than having a nighttime dry wedding (which I would not be a fan of).  No one will be staying till 11pm without alcohol, so if it’s at night I’d end it by 9pm.

By the way, if people want to drink…they will.  Whether or not you have a dry wedding.  You can’t stop people from doing it.  I’ve been to one dry wedding, and I actually drank before it and at it.  But you don’t have to contribute to it.

But if these were my family and friends, I think I’d just elope Frown  Sorry your situation sucks, OP

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