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Would you ever donate your eggs? What are your reasons for or against? I'm not in any way trying to cause a religious or political debate; I'm just curious as to what reasons would compel you to donate or not donate. Thanks!
I think the only time I'd ever consider this would be if my sister asked me. Other than that, nope.
I totally would since I never plan on using mine, but alas, I have a very bad genetic history (lots of breast cancer, among other bad things) so they would never consider harvesting mine. I've heard it pays loads of money, so why not! =o)
I would love to donate my eggs. For the money and for knowing that infertile couples were able to have a baby.
I think I'm too old now though and I'm not sure how I feel about the hormones.
@MadameTussaud: I've heard that the most you can get is like $10K / time and there's a life limit of 6 donations?? Maybe I'm totally mis-remembering, but I voted 'if the compensation was good enough' although I don't really think $10K is worth it to me for that type of procedure.
I don't know that I could give an egg to a sibling...if it went to a total stranger, maybe, but seeing a child that is physically half me on the regular would be more than I could be comfortable with.
@NDBee: For some reason I think 10k is what I've heard before too, but I'm not sure where or how I heard it, lol. But hell, 10k is twice my wedding budget, and it would give me plenty leftover for some sort of honeymoon!
I totally would in a red hot second if it would help someone get the family that they want. I already talked to DH about it and he said no, but it if he were not so firmly against it I would have already have started the process. It isn't like I am ever going to use an egg again, so I just hate thinking that my ubber fertile eggs are going to waste. Oh well.
@MadameTussaud: Just did some re-checking b/c I hate not knowing, and I found this page that says the regulations are generally $5K-$10K.
I totally would but I'm pretty sure I'm too old now anyway.
I don't plan to use them and I know that compensations is good.
If my significant other was okay with it and I had normal fertility, then I would in a heartbeat for a friend/family member. However, my SO is very much opposed and I respect that.
I couldnt stand the thought of some stranger raising my biological child. Its different then adoption bc you dont have the option to choose the parents. I dont like the idea of having biological children out there that I know nothing about. I'd like to raise my own children. Having a baby only made me feel even stronger about this. I think people can do w/e they like but personally for me I would never.
I'm pretty sure nobody would want my old eggs, but if a very close friend or family member wanted me to, then yes, I would. It would be a little odd if the child ended up looking like me and someone close to me was raising him/her, but I think I could get over it. It would be easiest if it was family though.
I wouldn't mind donating to a couple that really needed my egg to become parents, but knowing that I have a family history of breast and ovarian cancer, I'd be inclined not to do it because it might raise my risk to take clomid, etc.
No, personally if you already aren't having your biological child, I think you should adopt one of the "already made" kids waiting for a home. Plus I read a medical thriller about it where all kinds of things went wrong with an egg donation.
I would only consider it for my sister. (I was going to say my siblings, but then realized the implications of me donating an egg to my brother! :o!) I can't seem to come to terms with the ethical issues involved with egg donation to strangers. What if my biological child unknowingly meets my donated-egg-biological-child later in life?
I offered to donate for my sister as she's had trouble conceiving, but she hates needles so much she declined. It's an open offer to her if she changes her mind.
After that I thought hard about whether I ought to donate in general if I was willing to donate to her. I never came to a conclusion or acted on it, but I did a lot of research. I'm sure I'm now too old to be wanted as a donor (32). It's a fairly invasive procedure with rare but signifcant consequences at times. It'd take a lot for me to want to do that for someone I don't know & love! At the time I looked, about 7-10 years ago, I would have been a "highly compensated" donor due to test scores/schools I attended/a few physical characteristics (while not rare, ones that weren't terrifically common either).
I would do it for sure. My FH is actually the one who is against it. I will revisit it after we have a few children of our own.
i would love to but as we havent had kids (and no plans to) that seems to cross me off the list as a possible canidate
No way and ESPECIALLY not for someone I know. I can't watch someone I know raising my mini me!
No, and I wouldn't allow my FH to donate his sperm either... It's selfish and I wish I could be the kind of person who could give that gift to someone, but I just couldn't bring myself to give part of myself to a stranger or even more, see one of my family members being called mommy for a child that I know has my curly hair, my blue eyes, etc. :(
I think being a surrogate for a family member is a different situation and I would do that. You didn't ask that, but I would be curious to see what the women who said no to donating would say about surrogacy (without using their genetic material) Maybe I'll make a seperate thread!
I don't know what the procedure is like, but I wouldn't want to do it if I had to recover for a long time (more than a week). 5-10K is definitely not enough lol. I would if someone paid me a LOOOT more though. Being bedridden for money is not worth it! It sounds creepy, nobody sells their kidney o.O
@chastenet: What if my biological child unknowingly meets my donated-egg-biological-child later in life?
This is a concern of mine too. But mostly, I want to have a say in how my biological child is raised and it would just be way to hard for me to separate from it. I also would not let H donate sperm, were he so inclined. I don't know if I would have cared 10 years ago, but now we are so close to TTC that I want it all for me! I've also heard the experience is really not pleasant for the egg donor.
No, there are too many risks associated with it. I also do not like the way college students are exploited-- they are often targeted with ads for egg donation because they are drowning in the rising costs of higher education.
I'm really undecided on this. I have a difficult time processing the fact that I could have biological children out there and not know them. That being said, it is a very selfless thing to do, and if I were to do it, I'd rather donate eggs to a stranger than someone I know and would have to be around...I think it would complicate the dynamic too much.
I wouldn't. I've heard that it is a brutal process and I would not want to go thru it
Yes, I have looked into it several times. I would do it for free due to personal reasons.
I would have said no before going through infertility, but now that I've been there I think I would.
You have to have a very specific background to be accepted, typically, and I don't think I'd pass!
I really doubt I would. The Boy considered being the donor for his best friend and her wife, and it made me feel kind of weird... Although in the same vein as the surrogacy thread, if my best friend decided she wanted and couldn't conceive, I might consider making the offer if the Boy was okay with it.
No. I would only consider it for siblings but even that I'm not sure about. Thank god all our siblings are done so that won't ever be a issue!
I don't like the thought that there could be kids of mine out there that I don't know about.
I can't, but I would if I could for family or really close friends. I wouldn't do it for compensation or for strangers, I don't think, because it's such an invasive process I'd have to get at least something personally from it (like helping someone I KNOW) as selfish as that sounds.
I've had friends offer to do it for me, and my mom (only in her 40s) said she would do it for me if she could.
I would definitely donate eggs for my sister, but that's it. I would want to keep the genetics in the family, and she's my only sibling.
As I've gone through IVF and had a good response and no bad reactions to the meds and procedures, it makes it easier for me to feel confident about doing it. But I would probably want to do the donation with the same practice and protocols used in my own cycle.
I would in a hot second. Having struggled with infertility and going through all the emotions, if I could help another couple out, I would in a heart beat. I have PCOS and therefore have a higher ovarian reserve that most women my age (my mom says I'm an egg hoarder), so I have plenty to spare. With having had to think about egg donation, sperm donation, or even adoption I've come to the conclusion that it doesn't matter where the baby comes from, as long as there is a baby at the end of the day, and if I can give that to a couple who wouldn't have one otherwise, then I absolutely would.
I just would not feel comfortable having a biological child out there and not knowing them.
I'd be fine with it. Money is great, helping people is great. I wouldn't pass the background check though.
I really don't care if someone is running around with half my genetics. Whatever. It's not like I'd be their mother. I'm not really all that attatched to my DNA to begin with.
I have done it. It is not something one does for money, though I dont know if it works differently in the states. I had the opportunity to help a couple who wanted a child by donating biological material that goes to waste down the drain every month anyway. It is not something to be taken lightly, as it is an extended process which involves psychiatric assessments, top to toe medical examinations which are extremely invasive. Over here there is not a large financial reward, my travelling was more than the reimbursement for expenses but i expect that some people will do it for money and that i dont agree with. It is an extremely intensive process and you have to inject yourself with hormones, etc, so really not something to be taken lightly. My donation resulted in a healthy set of pigeon pair twins being born in ireland and it is great knowing that the wonderful recipient and her husband are now parents to their two gorgeous babies that they prayed for and sacrificed so much for to have. Here in south africa it is an extremely strict process that is followed and the doctors and staff at the fertility clinics are excellent and they make sure that both the recipients and donors are well informed and especially that the donors arent just trying to make some money, because you really cant on what you get paid over here.
I have two girlfriends who have done this. I believe one is on her 5th or 6th time and the other is on her 2nd. One does it 100% for money (her own words) and the other does it for money but really likes the idea of helping others become a mom, she's a mom herself & a great one at that!
I never realized how much went into it until these two girls opened up to me. The girl who has done it many more times has basically no side effectes besides minor bloating. The other friend was in severe pain by the time it came for the egg retreival and had to come clean to her parents (she's 30 yrs old) on what she was doing and had her mom drive her the Dr. appt.
Both girls are in MA and get about $7-$8k each time plus a few extra hundred for mileage etc.
Me, I wouldn't do it unless a VERY close friend or family member asked. Just not my thing. I wonder how or if laws etc will be change in the next 18 yrs. If they get 12 eggs, could I possibly have 12 kids looking for their egg donor mom in 18 years? One GF has given consent for her info be given to the child if ever requested. The other one who does it more for the love of kids & family has kept in touch with some of the parents who received her donation, but she's never mentioned anything about the child.
I think it should be something done souly for the purpose of bettering someone else's life and not for money. But I wouldn't expect the donor to acquire and pay for the medical procedure and all that leads up to it.
Also my GF's who have donated passed all the tests etc but then they were chosen by the couple (they described it sorta kinda like a catalogue situation). One GF is BEAUTIFUL and has been chosen more times than she could donate. The other friend said that she thinks she was was chosen by the couples b/c she looked similar to them/mom. They were both told that they could donate after the age of 30, but their chances of being chosen drops drastically.
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