- 3 years ago
Hey everyone! I’m new here, but have been a regular board stalker for a very long time. The Mr.Rex and I aren’t engaged yet, but I know he’s just waiting on me to give him the okay (I know, I’m the odd one out).
Although there’s no ring on my finger, we’ve talked about wedding and marriage quite a bit. We both know that it’s definitely in the future for us, we’re just not sure how to go about it or when the exact date would be. For the longest time I just assumed I’d be having a semi-traditional wedding, but the past few days I’ve been thinking about elopement… and the idea seems sweeter everyday.
So some back story –
I have a massive, amazing family that is so crazy and wonderful. We’re all very close and get together often for gatherings and parties. Part of me would love a big wedding with all my family and friends, and another part of me dreads the thought of planning a huge affair. I’m a super perfectionist and would hate to have the ‘ugly wedding’ that’s just half-assed… I’m the crafty, artsy member of our family and I know everyone would expect me to go all-out, and honestly I’d be pretty disappointed if I planned a big wedding and didn’t go all-out. I also don’t have a lot of time for DIY, so I know it would be either a huge expense or a crazy headache trying to plan (probably both). As far as an actual wedding goes… I hate the idea of including/not including bridesmaids. I hate the idea of trying to figure out who to invite, and who to leave out (regular weddings with my family are 250+, and I just cannot afford to feed that many people and still have good food, lol). I’m among the youngest in my family, and so everyone else has kids, and I’m not really a kid person, and just ugh. So much stress, even for a pretty relaxed, local beach wedding (like we were planning).
Also, another huge issue with getting married locally… The fella works at a great job that provides a large, beautiful house for him to live in, except I can’t live with him there unless we are legally married. So it’s either cheap apartment, or living with the rents (womp womp). I’d love to be living together within a year, but I know I can’t get engaged and plan a big awesome wedding that soon. I’m a wedding photographer and he’s an event caterer, so our summer and fall weekends are blocked for the next two years, and we have disgusting winters and springs. So local summer wedding would have to go on hold for quite a while, probably three years at least, during which time we’d have to be living seperately because of the particular circumstances. And I don’t like that idea at all.
For the longest time the fella has had this dream of going to Ireland. And me, I just love to travel everywhere and anywhere. The other day I jokingly said that we should run away to Ireland and get married. And he totally agreed. This is an option that I had never really thought of before… but now it has me really excited. We could just book a photographer, buy a simple dress, and fly off to a beautiful place that we’ve been dreaming of for a spring wedding… do our honeymoon, take a nice long trip, and then come back home and have a huge barbeque shindig on a random weekday with no planning or decorating or stress about bridal party. it’s a win-win.
Anyone who’s been in my shoes know if it’s actually easier? Would I regret running away and getting married, even if it’s not actually running?