(Closed) Eloping = no bridesmaids who do you talk to …get excited with?

posted 5 years ago in Elopement
Post # 3
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@rainbowbee:  my FI and I are have a DW, jsut the two of us but its not really “eloping” bc the whole world knows lol. I talk to my family and close co workers about things. They dont seem to be annoyed by it. This will be #2 for both of us, so everyone agrees that there’s no reason to “break the bank”.

Post # 4
Member
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@rainbowbee:  

Kind of the same. Except  we haven’t told anyone, and probably won’t until afterward. (Otherwise I think we’ll end up getting a lot of pressure to have a “proper” wedding.) 

Post # 5
Member
1186 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

You talk to the Bees! That’s what I do.

Post # 6
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@the boss of you:  That’s what I was going to say!! We’re here for all your bridal chat needs!!

Post # 7
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@rainbowbee… I feel the same way.

We are doing a DW/elopment.  I have told my best friend (M-o-H) about it, but she lives in another state and is so busy with her life.  I also feel bad talking to her about it because I know she feels lonely, she doesn’t have a BF and I don’t want to feel like I’m rubbing it in her face that I’m getting married and she’s doesn’t even have a BF.  I told another friend who lives in my state, but she’s going through a wicked divorce and has three kids ranging from 5 – 16 who have tons of activities.  Altough she has gone with me shoe shopping and managed to put together a nice bachelorette party with 3 wks notice, but we some how ended up talking about her divorce and situation during both occasions. Under normal circumstances I don’t like attention and I’m always there my friends, but for once I want to be center of attention. I only felt that when I went wedding dress shopping and I was alone then. 

When I talk wedding stuff with my fiance he gets a little frusrated because he says he wants to enjoy this period and doesn’t want to deal with the usual wedding “stuff”.  He’s says that’s why we are not doing a “traditional” wedding.  So who do I talk to?  I have nobody to share my excitements, ideas, questions, etc.  We are telling our immediate families late in Sept (if they come, they come. If they don’t, they don’t) but by then everything should be done.

Post # 8
Member
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@the boss of you:  +1. That is what I do.

I talk to my fiance’ and all of you. Since our family/friends think we post poned for another year, so they could all save more money, I don’t talk wedding plans with any of them anymore. 

Post # 9
Member
4956 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

The only person I really told that we were eloping was my next door neighbor/good friend (she was going to dog sit for me while we were gone). So I was able to talk about it with her.

Post # 10
Member
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I talk to my fiance! Lol. Of course. We are the only ones that know. With the exception of my mom. She has some health issues and afraid that if we show up one day and spring the announcement on her that she couldn’t handle it. I don’t want to put my mother in the hospital over a surprise. So I told her but I don’t really talk with her about it too much and she respects that. I talk to my future husband about it and we are doing the planning together and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Post # 11
Member
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@Elvis:  I agree. We arent telling friends and family because we don’t want our wedding to turn into something that we don’t want. We want it to be just us and a photographer. We will have each of our best friends there as witnesses due to our state law, but we haven’t even told them yet. Don’t want things to leak out.

Post # 12
Member
4415 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

That’s one of the hard parts about eloping.  DH and I eloped, and I couldn’t even talk to my mom about it, because she was upset that we were going to Savannah Georgia to elope when we live in Michigan. She tried everything she could think of to try to change our plans. Fortunately, she didn’t succeed, because our wedding was perfect.

Like I said the drawback of eloping is you don’t have anyone to talk to about the plans or anyone to help with the details. It’s the down side of eloping, so you have to find a way to really focus on the wonderful romantic parts that go with eloping, and not let this part get you down.

On another note, even if you weren’t eloping, I think you would find that people who are not involved with the wedding would change the subject when you bring up wedding plans. It’s just not a topic that people are really interested in talking about if they aren’t involved. 

Post # 13
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Have you read the threads on here? Seriously, it sounds like most people’s BMs are not like what you’re talking about and we’re not suppose to expect anything beyond them showing up sober in their dress. LOL

I used the bee to talk about stuff. It was pretty stress free so there wasn’t much to freak out about. 

Post # 14
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

“2am break downs calls, emergency dress maker, moving house you name it we will try to help”

I have some nice friends, but probably none that would do all those things or even offer those things!  I didn’t have any crisises thankfully, so I really didn’t need the help of anyone.

I did however, talk about my wedding with anyone who asked questions.  It was not a secret by any means, and all the friends understood the circumstances surrounding the reason for elopement. 

 

Post # 16
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

You’re right behind me Rainbowbee.  We’re eloping too!  And I’ve very excited, but telling no one beforehand.  I love this site because I have the same issue! There’s no one to gush about my wedding with.  I do anticipate it being a hot topic when we return though, so we’ll probably enjoy talking then!

 

And Yes! you should have flowers if you want them and anything else wedding related that you want too.  Where are you going and is it going to be your honeymoon destination too, or are you taking a honeymoon later?  Best wishes!

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