- 3 years ago
Hi everyone, just wanted to get some comments/ advice on my situation.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for the last 9years and we have 2 children together, we’ve decided to get married but are facing a couple issues. For one thing i lost my job last year and was at home for months so we were faced with some financial difficulites and trying to catch up on things as he was the only source of income. This has affected my credit score as my loan went into default.
I eventually got another job but by the time i did things were sort of out of control. Because of this we decided to have a very small simple wedding but unfortunately the cost of things wasn’t allowing us to get things done. We set a few dates for our wedding but kept pushing it back to allow us more time to be able to pay comfortably for everything as i won’t qualify for a loan at this point. We aren’t receiving any help at all from neither of our families but yet still they wanna have alot of input on how we should do things which was starting to really annoy me. Unfortunately with everything going on i was diagnosed with depression so some days are really bad for me and everything feels like its just falling apart.
We have reached the point where i suggested to him that we have a planned elopement, tell our family and have our wedding ceremony next year (2015) where we can have our families present. we are hoping that in this time we can sort out our financial issues and be more comfortable.
I have days where i feel really sad about the situation because i never imagned that my wedding would be this way but at the same time i just wanna get this over with and get things right; start my marriage. we havent told any of our family as yet just because we know there is gonna be alot of drama because of this decision regardless of the fact that they aren’t helping.
My question is, should we tell them about it before and face the drama or after… when there may be just as much drama?