Post # 1
My fiance are eloping and I couldn’t be more relieved! The wedding planning was really taking the joy out of me.
I first wanted a beach/tented reception, not realizing tent/table/chairs rental was close to $4k. Then I thought of a DW, but that too became stressful figuring out our families schedules, and the costs added up.
We’ve decided to elope to Maui. The cost for the wedding with photos and video will be about $1,000, 1/4 of the cost of the tent alone. This frees up our money to be spent on our honeymoon in Hawaii.
This is my first wedding. I’m 43. We’ll have a bbq for our friends when we get back. No need for a fancy tent or photographer.
I’m hoping I don’t regret never having a big wedding, but right now I feel so happy!
Anyway ~ anyone else out there who changed their mind about having a traditional wedding and couldn’t be happier?
Post # 3
I can’t shed any light on eloping, but I can tell you that I loved Maui! It sounds like you are going to have an amazing time. It will be so, so special. 🙂
Post # 4
I think you will be so pleased with your decision! Good luck!
Post # 5
That sounds awesome! Good luck!
Post # 6
@CaymanGirl: I was well into planning (and paying) a 75 person destinaton wedding in Grand Teton National Park when we decided to cancel it. As soon as we canclled it (my dad was dying though), I think I finally slept through for an entire night. I did not realize how much brain space the planning and the worrying was taking up. I needed that sleep. It was a huge weight off my shoulders! It was a good decision on many different levels.
Post # 7
@sienna76: Sorry about your Dad. I know how hard that is, my Mom passed away two weeks ago. While she was sick I couldn’t plan anything, and now that she’s gone I feel sad she won’t be there. Maybe that’s another reason why I want to just get married and elope sooner, I realize how short life is. The thought of waiting a year to plan a big event makes my stomach churn.
Plus, I’m older. I’ve been a bridesmaid too many times and I’m over it so to speak. Rather than feeding our friends who we rarely see in real life, we are choosing to have a nice honeymoon and travel a bit.
I know how you feel, I feel like a weight is off my shoulders too. The stress and fuss would ruin my wedding. Now I can relax and just enjoy it.
Can you post a few pics? I’d love to see a few, plus your dress. Did you go simple? How soon after your Dad pass did you elope?
Post # 8
I wanted to elope to Maui and have a bbq upon our return, too(!) But alas it was not to be for a myriad of reasons–mostly his family. I am very very jealous and happy for you!
Post # 9
@CaymanGirl: I am so sorry about your mom. That was so recent. How are you doing?
We got married 88 days after my dad passed. The first month I was kind of numb. The next month things got better but I was still mopey (my dad left behind some very unsavory secrets that we all were left to process without answers). At the end of that I was feeling more normal. I posted a while ago about how long did it take to feel normal again. Like you, I wanted to just be married, but I wanted to feel back to normal too. The last month we started talking about what we were going to do. Our family said they could not travel to us, so we decided to go far away.
I’d love to share our photos! Here is a link to the photographer’s webiste:
I had a gown, bouquet, etc. We did not have music though. We made it an 11 day road trip and hiked everyday. The wedding was on day 5.
Post # 10
I didn’t elope, but – Congratulations!! It is so exciting that you were able to do something that works for you. 🙂 HAVE FUN!!
Post # 11
Congratulations! I am so jealous in a happy way for you. I had originally wanted to elope to some exotic location and have the intimate seaside wedding but was surprised when FI decided he really wanted to have the whole wedding experience. I’m not unhappy with it, nor am I having a hard time with the wedding planning. A tropical elopment is just so romantic.
Post # 12
@sienna76: I LOVE your photos! OMG! I’ve never seen such lovely, cool photos. My whole house would be 16 by 20 images of that day! Really awesome! I love how unique your day was.
I’m doing ok for the most part. I mourned for 6 months while my Mom had cancer. I’m sad, there are times when a wash of sadness comes over me. It still seems unreal. And I feel guilty for even moving on and finding happiness in planning a wedding/travel. But like I said, life is short for everyone. I’m feeling my days are numbered too, and i just want to make them count.
Anyway, thanks for sharing. I’m glad you were able to have such a nice wedding. So many people I know say they’d elope if they could do it again – so I guess we took the road less traveled..but the road many wish they had taken.
Post # 13
@HisMoon: Thanks. There is only one obstacle, however. my future MIL. My fiance says if she is sad about our plans, we should marry locally. OMG. I refuse to even go there right now. I’ll be beside myself. Hello, it’s my day!!
Anyway, fingers crossed please. There are so many reasons why I just want a simple “I do” at sunset in Maui, just us two. I’ll check in with your weddings too, I’d like to see what you bees are planning!
Post # 14
@CaymanGirl: Thank you! It was really “us” in so many ways. Who hikes 5 miles on their wedding day? We did!
I think I also mourned my father months before he passed, like you did for your mom. I cried way more while he was alive just feaing the pain and sadness. I did not live near him so I flew in Jan, Mar, May of 2012, then two weeks later he declined and I was able to fly out to spend the last 5 hours by his bedside. I still can’t believe he held on and waited for me. We all held him while he died.
Maybe all that premourning allowed me to move on to get married 88 days later. We were already engaged for 15 months by that time, no more putting off!
He always encouraged eloping in generally saying no one wants to go to a wedding; weddings are PITA for everyone invovled. LOL
I look forward to reading your journey.
Post # 15
@CaymanGirl: Would you be willing on compromising on having guests? Specifically the parent(s)? It’ll still be intimate and not have to swing all the way back to having a big wedding.
Post # 16
Congrats!! I’m not eloping, but having a Maui DW with approx 11 guests (half of whom are kids). If you need suggestions on photographer, wedding cake bakery, florist etc, lemme know! Sounds like you have it all decided though:)