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My FI asked my Dad...
He picked up the ring from the store, met my Dad at his work with a "car problem" question and then asked him. He came home, we were just laying on the couch and he proposed (all this in the same day!). COMPLETELY out of the blue. I had no idea he was even ring shopping. We had looked at rings 1-2 years ago and that was it.
Nah...he didn't. He is an encore groom...I am a first-time bride. I have been on my own for over 12 years raising my daughter as a single mom. He asked my daughter's permission =)
Yes, he did because he wanted to make sure he had their blessing, which he did - of course!
He did ask my dad. And he won major points because the ex never did!
Mine actually did ask my dad (or tell him his intentions and ask for my dad's blessing) although I had no idea at the time. He told me about it after he proposed, and I thought it was a very sweet move and completely unexpected. My ex never did this, and my parents were NOT happy that he and I were getting married. It is so nice to have their blessing and support this time around.
He asked my dad when my parents were helping us move. I still can't get over my dad's response... FI and I have been together for 4 years and my dad said, "what took you so long!" I couldn't believe it!! Still in shock and we've been engaged since April 2009.
I think I would be insulted if the Boy asks my dad for permission. For me, (even though I'm not engaged yet) getting married again will be completely my decision. It's about me making my own choices for my life and not doing anything to please anyone else, and certainly not asking for their permission.
I do not want my dad to walk me down the aisle (been there, done that) and I don't want a father/daughter dance. I want everything just to be between and about me and the Boy.
BUT... I will say I do have issues with my dad (who I love to death) overstepping his bounds and always treating me like I'm still in the fifth grade.
Asked both mom & dad for permission (loved the equal opportunityness!) As independent as I am, I definitely fall back on tradition for some things and truly appreciated the effort (seeing as we live far from them, be actually made a trip to FL where they live to ask them -- all without my knowledge. Major brownie points!)
Nope, my mom and I are not close and I haven't talked to my father in many years.
FI didn't ask, but we discussed it with them before it was official. They offered to pay for the honeymoon before he proposed, so we decided that they were ok with it!
I'm not sure who would have laughed harder if she had--me or my parents. I have very limited contact with my father, and none with my mother. Also, I can't imagine needing permission from anyone to get married in my 20s, and it would have been totally ludicrous in my 50s.
My father passed away 10 years ago, so he asked the minister what to do. He said "ask her son..after all, he's the little man of the house!".
And he did! My son was thrilled!
@Bellenga: I actually like the idea of asking the kids. I would totally love it if the Boy asked the kids, although I could see my 4 year-old daughter giving him a hillarious response.
Nope... he asked me when we were talking about marriage and getting engaged before and I told him it isnt necesary and my parents would probably ruin the surprise element of it.
Mine didn't. He said he thought about it; especially when we spent time with family right before leaving town on the engagement trip. Ultimately he figured that I'm an adult and can make my own desicions. He said he would have asked my daughter, but knew she can't keep a secret. He also figured he knew her answer since she had been asking weekly when we would get married.
I told him he couldn't. My dad had been asked already. I thought he might be jinxed;)
My FH first ask the kids if it would be alright if he married their mom, they both said yes, but my son told my FH that he should ask my dad, so the three of them went out for breakfast, (my son and dad do that every Saturday) and in the middle of breakfast my son ask my FH when he was going to ask my dad, apparently it was all very funny. And since everyone replied yes, he then decided to ask me if I wanted to marry him.
He can't. My parents have died. But maybe I should ask HIS parents permission to marry their son....then again, maybe not...:)
In a word...no. It seemed silly at 19, and it seems downright ridiculous at 35. I haven't lived with my father for two decades. Asking permission, along with "giving the bride away" (another must-miss for us) reeks of fathers "owning" their daughters anyway.
My DH did and my father still tells the story. It made a huge impression. I think it depends on the parents.
my father passed away 8 years ago, and my mother and i aren't close. my fiance invited my brothers and sister out to brunch one Sunday and asked them for their blessing. i love the gesture...and so did my family :)
Yes, he did. My ex had not even met my parents before the wedding, so my DH now wanted to start off on a better foot.
He spoke to my grandfather and grandmother and brother in law and they were all so happy! I am so glad he did this, because they both passes away in early 2010. Grandma in february, and my grandfather followed her into eternity at the end of March. Married 70 years.
My father is deceased, so he sadly could not ask him. My grandparents were so happy though! They are like my other parents. My mom is m.i.a. in our lives and in my sis' life too, and has been for a while, and she found out after the fact.
OMG - add me to the list of encore brides on this post who said their new FI's asked Dad and their ex's didn't. Hmmmmmm....coincidence?
As a VERY sweet side note, I am 51 and my FI is 60. My dearest FI asked my Dad's permission, and he was 90 at the time, blind, and entering the first stages of dementia. My FI also asked my Mom (88) and informed his parents (83 and 84).
And THAT's why I love him soooooo much. What a mensch!!!!!
@sonomagal now that is the most upright, respectable, SWEETEST things EVER!
My FI asked my Dad.. and yep I'm another where my ex did not. lol
I am the biggest Daddy's girl this world has seen. My first husband did ask my dad (he apparently had to get pretty drunk to swollow it) and I was glad he did. My FI now has a really good relationship with my dad, they're great friends. However, I told him I've been out of the house for 8 years, FI and I have been living together almost 3 years. I don't need him to ask Dad. He was going to ask my mom, but he proposed before he got around to it. lol
He talked to both of my parents about his intentions before the proposal, but I think we were all surprised at the timing... We talked to our children seperately and then together before we began wearing our engagement rings.
My daughters are 19, 20 and 22. Mike calledveach one and asked fo their permission and blessing. Then helped them surprise me by getting my 20 yo to FL for our annual family reunion and once they all arrived he proposed with them there.
My wholebfamily. 72 people that weekend knew before he asked.
My mom passed away 11 years ago and no father in the picture.
When Z asked me to marry him, and I accepted we were just kind of lingering along the shore and he said, "well what do you think about it?"I nodded and he said "so you think that will be allright?" and I said yeah and he said, "Well your daddy seems to think it will all right." I said, "Awwww you asked my daddy?" (because number 1 did NOT, of course my dad would have probably said no way. lol) I thought it was a very honorable thing to do. My dad had out of the blue mentioned one day that Z was a pretty nice fella and I said yeah he is wondering why the randomness, but knowing my dad it was not off base so didn't think anything else about it. Then it all became clear.
Yes he did, I was there when he did it, it was more of a, asking for his blessing sort of thing, because he had already asked me.
There will be no asking of my dad. Or my mom. My grandma raised me. SO has to ask my kids though. My best friend jokes and says he has to ask the dog, cause I've had him the longest LOL.
there will be no asking of anyone but me. DH1 did not ask for permission, nor will FI. my parents' answer to such a question would be to say, "isn't that something you should as her?" and then they'd promptly lose most of their respect for him. it's not the way my family operates. they can give their blessing or not when we tell them our plans, but i am my own woman and don't need anyone's permission to marry. not my son's either. (not that he'd say much of anything either way...he's currently 14mo and will be two and a half when we tie the knot, lol.)
We did the opposite- I actually asked my parents if they were ok with me living with Mountain Man. My mother said " at 45 you are asking my permission to move in with a man" she laughed so hard I could hear it from Whidbey Island to Philadelphia.
When we told her to plan a Vegas Vacation this summer she was quite pleased, howevre. I think she secretly wanted us to be "legit"
Ex did not and we were young. I was 22 and he was 23. My current FI did, and I was 29 and he was 46.
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