(Closed) Encores: Dealing with finances differently this time around?

posted 8 years ago in Encore
  • poll: Say Yup to the Pre-Nup? Are you signing one?
    Yes - I did so the first time and will do so this time as well. : (0 votes)
    Yes, this time. I did not the first time. : (5 votes)
    45 %
    No, I didn't last time and I won't this time. : (4 votes)
    36 %
    Other (I'll explain in the comments) : (2 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7054 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I refuse to sign a prenup.  He knows about it.  I didn’t sign one before and my xh would have found a way to go around a prenup b/c he was at fault and still hid hid assets.  Wouldn’t have mattered if I had one either with him b/c he would have found a way to hide them still. 

    Plus T knows I was MORE than fair with my xh and didn’t get that much cs or even ss at all. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    357 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    We didn’t feel the need for a pre-nup.  I was not in a place where I needed one last time around, and neither was he.  With this relationship, we were both more than fair with our exes, and each other knew that.  Call me old-fashioned, but it’s just not something that I thought that we needed.

    Post # 6
    Member
    57 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    Taking community property has changed my outlook on Pre-nups.  It is a requirement for me.  Law school changes how you look at a lot of things.  SMH.  Good thing my future husband is in agreement.  

    Post # 8
    Member
    7054 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I do wish I had a “bad boy” clause in a prenup with my ex though since we didn’t have a prenup.

    But even if we had one, he still would have lied and cheated his way around it.  More slippery than a wet rubber ball that one!

    Post # 9
    Member
    234 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    I will be doing all the accounting in our home.  This is VERY scary to me as I am not the balance the checkbook on a regular basis kind of girl – I KNOW!!

    I am going to get the budget software and my sister has promised to help me get started on the right foot.  She used to be worse then me and then she turned in to super accountant and she says they are so much better off because she is aware of every thing that is spent.

    We are not doing a prenup – I told him I would gladly sign one if he wanted – he will be the one to continue working after we decided to start with the kids.  He doesn’t feel it’s needed, so I’m ok with that. 

    We will also be doing the joint account with our personal play accounts on the side.  All the bills and household expenses will come out of the main account and the personal accounts are for whatever we want to do extra.  We are also going to get a joint savings account that we are not able to access unless both of us walk in to the bank together.  I love that my bank does that!  This will be for vacations, new cars, and things like that.  We will also have an emergency fund that will not be linked to our other accounts for the IF’s in life.

    I never realized there was so much to money until I started really paying attention.  I did realize that I would have so much more if I had just paid more attention a long time ago!

    Post # 10
    Member
    57 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @SF_Carrie – if only it were that simple.  It is easier said than done that we’ll agree to keep all of our pre-marriage assets separate; however, the income you make during marriage is Community Property and if you make any payments toward assets with community property income, a percentage of the SP now becomes CP.  Hence the need for a prenup in a community property state.   It seem simple at first glance, but it is not that black and white.  After taking Community Property, I’ve been all for a prenup. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    1514 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    We signed a pre-nup.  I offered.  At first he declined, but we ended up doing it after I went through the reasons for why we should.  Our finances are completel.y seperate.  We each pay certain bills and then the rest is our own.  We have kids from previous relationships and it just seemed the best way.

    Post # 12
    Member
    401 posts
    Helper bee

    wasn’t asked either time, but would do it…

    Post # 13
    Member
    2616 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    didnt do one The first time– GOT SCREWED

    doing one this time just incase but i hope and pray that we wont need to use it.

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