Engaged bees- how do you REALLY feel about wedding planning?

posted 3 years ago in Logistics
  • poll: How is planning?
    Amazing, we are having a great time and let the little hiccups roll off us : (15 votes)
    21 %
    Good, but there have been some issues/ stress but not between us : (19 votes)
    26 %
    Good, but we have had fights over it : (7 votes)
    10 %
    I am totally stressed and can't wait for it to be over : (4 votes)
    5 %
    Money is a real issue/ challenge : (11 votes)
    15 %
    I hate it but its not affecting relationships : (10 votes)
    14 %
    I hate it and relationships have been affected : (1 votes)
    1 %
    I'm eloping!! Screw that noise! : (2 votes)
    3 %
    We postponed/ canceled the wedding because of issues : (2 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4601 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @Andthepupmakes3:  It’s been stressful and if we hadn’t already put so many deposits down, we’d just go to the courthouse. I haven’t really enjoyed any part of the planning process, I don’t have a lot of support, and I don’t have any help with anything. Money is also a pain in the ass. My parents are helping us with most of the larger costs, but we’re still covering a nice chunk of it. I mostly just want it to be over at this point and I still have 5 months left. I sat on the couch and cried for about 20 minutes earlier because I was so stressed out. Not fun at all. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    8518 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I’m so over it.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1101 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    I hate wedding planning, it has been the most stressful thing I have ever done in my life so far. If I had to do it all over again I would have refused the money my mother offered for a big wedding and just gone to Vegas and had a small destination wedding/honeymoon. I looked into doing one at the beginning of our engagement but I was eventually turned off by the lack of choice of and customization offered, now I would kill not to have to make so many decisions. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    1068 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    Not a big fan in general.  Party planning isn’t my thing.  I HAVE enjoyed the fact that it’s a project that FI and I do together.  He really wanted a big/traditional wedding, and I said that there was no way I was going to plan one for him, so he needed to help.  He has gone so far above and beyond my expectations, and I feel so lucky to have him!

    Post # 10
    Member
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee

    I’m just at the beginning, so for now the correct answer would be ”money is a big challenge and issue”, but that would be true for anything, since we’re both college students. 

    I started dress shopping and I thought I would enjoy it  – Nope, I really hate it.

    I hope I’ll be okay with the rest of the planning because I want to enjoy DIY (and we don’t have that much to do).

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    871 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @Andthepupmakes3:  I find some of it stressful but mostly I am very type-A and like to organize things so when I think about just planning something I get all fueld up and excited. When I realize its for our wedding I get this holy crap I better not mess this up feeling and that can cause some stress. Also I find five months out a very weird time. All of the bug stuff is done and invitations and cake tasting are set for the start of December, but what the heck am I supposed to be planning in the mean time?!? Like, I feel stressed because ordering escort cards making seating charts making a timeline planning music cues all seem too early but it stresses me out just waiting for january when I know its going to suddenly be chaotic! Hahaha Overall though (NOT counting family drama all weddings seem to unearth in some way) it has been mainly fun with a hint of stressful here and there and the expectation it will turn mainly stressful with a hint of fun come january 

    ETA: I am marrying an accountant so money stress hasn’t been an issue because we set a very definite budget at the start and when I try and smudge it he gives me that “money is my job what are you doing” look and I back off hahaha Off season has relieved a lot of that monitary stress as well! 

    Post # 13
    Member
    789 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I think I had unrealistic expectations of the planning process.  There are just so many little details to consider, and FI works SO much that it is my responsibility.  He has helped with things that are important to him, and has been supportive when I need his help, but logistically he is simply unable to do much planning.  We’ve had arguments over some silly things, but nothing that wasn’t worked out quickly.  Ultimately it will all be worth it, but I’m just ready for it to be here at this point!!!

    Post # 14
    Member
    159 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I’m not engaged anymore, I am married now but I just wanted to add in my .10 cents worth that I HATED wedding planning!! Not my thing lol

    Post # 15
    Member
    1555 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    i voted the top one because it was the closest to my feelings, but not spot on. I enjoyed the planning because I love planning, but easily started to get over the whole wedding thing. I never was the girl who dreamed of a wedding so I had to sit down and think about what I actually wanted! 

    We had 10 weeks from engagement to wedding and DH was gone on patrol The entire time. It was very hard to reach him So it made it a little harder to make decisions.  But, my mom and I worked with the “if you love it, let’s buy it” mindset and we went around almost every night getting what we needed.

    I don’t know how some ladies plan for a year or more!!! i can’t imagine! I was so burned pit the first week!

    Post # 16
    Member
    348 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    It has been a total roller coaster. I’m doing it all on my own. Neither my FI or my family care to really be involved. My mom wants to be, but she lives far away and really doesn’t have any opinions. I have to work hard to TRY to include her and give her jobs to do 🙂

    So when things are going well, it’s awesome and I’m loving it. When things aren’t going well (can’t find the right vendor, things are more expensive than I budgeted for, any surprises along the way), I get stressed and want to give up. 

    It’s a small wedding and I know I care about it way more than anyone else, so it doesn’t have to be perfect. But I only get to do this once and I want it to be magical!

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