Engaged without a ring?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
1443 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - parent's backyard

I know several people who got engaged w/o an engagement ring. it’s because the woman didn’t want one, and her SO knew it.   a lot of women are just not into e-rings and/or diamonds. my friends did choose a wedding band with other gemstones. 

my own case was kind of different: I had absolutely zero interest in e-rings and diamonds and kind of figured I’d go without one myself. but a few years after I met my SO, I saw one I liked and realized I wanted one really bad. I never saw myself as a diamond person before. strange how that can change!

Post # 4
399 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We got engaged without a ring – proposal wasn’t planned and we were on vacation. We did our courthouse ceremony a week after we got back and then he actually went & got my rings that day. So I never just wore an engagement ring by itself 😛 

It never really bothered me since we had such a short engagement. 

Post # 5
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I would absolutely be ok without an engagement ring.  (I would definitely want a wedding band, though.)  I also think it’s all about the couple.  Some care about the ring a lot; and, some won’t even bat an eyelash if they has a proposal without a ring. 

Post # 6
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I think a lot more people than we realize are not lucky enough to have the luxury of an engagement ring. It absolutely would not be a necessity for me.

Growing up, I remember saying to my dad how I didn’t “need an engagement ring”, and he about lost his shit. He said “you will NEVER accept a proposal from someone who doesnt give you a ring with it.” I love my dad, but I think that was not maybe the best lesson to teach a young girl: that loving a man has, essentially, monetary conditions.

So no: I do not think a ring is a requirement.


Post # 7
441 posts
Helper bee

I’m not a fan of the engagement ring symbolism in the first place, so I’d be very happy just to have wedding rings for both of us. My SO has mentioned he’d like to give me his late mom’s ring though, so I may end up with an engagement ring anyway.

Post # 8
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

FI and I were engaged without a ring for 6 months!  While I love my ring, I love FI even more.  The only reason why we didn’t announce to anyone before the ring because we know people will think it’s not a “true” engagement without a ring.

You don’t need a ring to show your commitment!  It’s the words and feelings behind it that counts!

Post # 9
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

It wouldn’t bother me at all. In fact, my DH proposed without a ring becayse I don’t particularly like engagement rings on me. I didn’t really class myself as “engaged” or have the accompanying parties/photoshoots and the like or wear a ring to symbolise this status because (a) I’m a bit ancient to be engaged abd (b) because we got married three and a half weeks after his proposal. All being well, I’ll get an eternity ring on our first anniversary and that, with my wedding band, will do very nicely indeed.

I can totally understand younger girls wanting a ring but what I really don’t understand is all these guys who buy the ring and then delay the proposal for months and months (in some cases years!) while their gfs go through this agonised waiting period. Both my sons proposed with engagement rings but there was absolutely no delay between getting the ring and making the proposal. 


Post # 10
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

i got engaged without a ring. i didn’t get a ring right away, as we were still searching for “the ring”. a ring doesn’t make it a proposal, the question and promise make it one.

Post # 11
2460 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I got engaged without a ring. It was on order so I knew it was coming but it didn’t even

As the next few weeks progressed I started to get annoyed and antsy because it was amazing how many people said our engagement wasn’t official or legit because I didn’t have a ring yet. I had bought my dress and we had booked the vendors but people would ask me if it’s official yet. Whenever someone finds out you’re engaged, the first thing they do is ask to see the ring. It did get a little frustrating to constantly have to explain and constantly deal with the eye rolls and comments. People are f’ing rude sometimes!

The thing that I like about the ring is that it’s a symbol of how serious the man/woman is when you are asked. You know they took the time to get something for you to “seal the deal” and I think it does enhance how special the moment already is.

I wouldn’t change our situation though.

Post # 12
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I got engaged without a ring. We’re planning the wedding right now. We did pick out a ring togther and he’s going to “formally propose” this christmas – something he’s set on doing.

It’s not a secret, but we’re making a broader announcement when we get the ring. Everyone close to us already knows though. And surprisingly, no vendors have given us flack about my ringless state.

Post # 13
2738 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

We got engaged and I didn’t have a ring for about a month. I still told everyone I was engaged, and simply wore a cz sterling silver eternity ring while searching for my ring. 

I’m the one who proposed to my bf, so I gave him a white gold band as an e-ring for his right hand. So he had a ring and I did not, haha! At that point I didn’t have a passion for rings such as I have now. So it truly was not an important factor at the time. I found my ring while shopping myself one month later. It was awesome to shop for it myself, since my fiancé wasn’t interested in the shopping part. He was totally happy helping me choose with the two final pics though, and he takes much pride in the ring, since he payed for it. We were engaged 1.5 years before our wedding last summer 🙂

Post # 14
11 posts
  • Wedding: December 2013

I think it totally depends on the couple. Some girls couldn’t imagine a proposal without a ring… personally, my fiance and I got engaged without one. I’m not a diamond person and never saw a modern ring that I liked. Recently, however, we found the perfect antique diamond ring so it ended up working out, but I still would have been completely fine without one.

I have had some friends and family look at us sideways because I still don’t have a ring (he hasn’t given it to me formally yet) but I just smile and tell them that I don’t need a ring to be committed to my man. Pretty much the same response I give when people find out that I’m keeping my name lol. I guess there will always be some people who don’t react well to anything not completely traditional, but I just try to shrug them off.

Post # 15
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

For my first marriage I was engaged without a ring. Everyone asked me where my ring was. For this marriage I asked my then boyfriend to clarify for me where we stood. I told him if he wanted us to get married, I wanted him to ask me and give me a ring. I specified that I wasn’t asking for anything expensive. I just wanted the symbol that he was serious. I also told him if he wasn’t ready to just tell me that. Of course we were already living together and combining our finances so I don’t think I was out of line for wanting clarification for where he saw our relationship headed. But no I don’t think a ring is absolutely necessary. I think its a personal choice. 

Post # 16
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We got engaged last July, and only got the ring by March. But we’re broke college kids so I guess that makes a bit of a difference. And I helped him pay for the ring the second time around. Felt bad not to.

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