Engagement party turned "surprise wedding"?? :)

posted 1 year ago in Ceremony
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee

I’ve heard of couples doing this and thought it was cute!  I would think it would be fun if I was a guest. 

Member
9263 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I think it’s a fun idea, and congrats, and I like how you’re thinking of those who might not attend.  Good luck and have fun!

Member
99 posts
Worker bee

One of my friends actually did this this summer; she and her fiance had an engagement/housewarming party after they bought a house together, except the bride’s daughter announced in the middle of the party that everyone needed to go out in the backyard for the wedding!  They had a couple of close friends who were in on the surprise and could help them out with getting dressed, preparations, etc.  They both disappeared during the middle of the party to change, then headed out back for the wedding ceremony after the announcement was made and all the guests were outside.  They also had a photographer, catered food, and a photo booth at the party – I heard some of the guests were thinking “man, this is a fancy engagement party!” before the announcement was made.  :) 

I am sure there could be some hurt feelings from people who decide to skip the party and thus miss out (“if I had known you were getting married, I would have changed my other plans!”)  i think your plan of letting people know that there won’t be a big wedding in the future might up your chances of not having that kind of thing happen, as they’ll consider this your reception and will definitely try to be there. 

Have fun and good luck!

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4366 posts
Honey bee

Just fyi, I would assume the “special announcement” was a pregnancy. Otherwise I think you’re fine.

Member
9 posts
Newbee

I think that sounds perfect.  I do think people will be convinced that you are pregnant for atleast the next nine months … but I think it sounds good.  Maybe word something about him leaving soon and wanting to see everyone to celebrate before he leaves.  Maybe start the rumor that the wedding will be after Basic.

Member
950 posts
Busy bee

I love this idea!!!

The special announcement does sound like a pregnancy announcement though.

Maybe you could just tell them this is a really important day to you and please can they try their best to be there?

Member
2788 posts
Sugar bee

@becky2198:  I would also think the special announcement was that your pregnant or something like that. It wouldn’t be even more reason for me to show up at the party though, and neither would you telling me that you were eloping.

I think it would actually do the opposite, it would feel really gift grabby to me if I was told you were eloping but yet you had an engagement party. I do however, think that anyone local would show up regardless. The OOTers on the other hand most likely wouldn’t make the trip.

Member
683 posts
Busy bee

Sounds like a cute idea but what is the makeup of your friends and family? Are they local enough that everyone could easily attend or will many people skip it because thwounded from OOT? 

 

I think it’s a cute idea but why not just be honest and say Hey we want to get married before he leaves and just do it ‘normal’?

 

i guess I don’t exactly understand why you would want to keep it a secret….Wei mean my wedding is 11m away and I don’t think that I would be able to keep it a secret/not talk w my friends about planning/etc

Member
2574 posts
Sugar bee

my mom’s aunt did this. it was awesome. super casual, laid back. the only people who knew were her kids, my grandfather, and my mom and aunt. nobody else. they invited everyone over for a bbq, and called it their engagement party. but instead, they ended up getting married right then and there.

Member
1642 posts
Bumble bee

As a guest I personally wouldn’t like this. I’d want to have planned out accomodations, transporation if the wedding includes drinking, buying an appropraite gift and card – you won’t get any wedding cards only engagement cards. I donno, I just don’t really understand the whole concept. I agree with a poster above and just do the wedding in the normal way.

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4982 posts
Honey bee

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