Engagement Question?

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

It’s all about what suits you and your FI, hon. I’m having a year long engagement. A friend of mine had a month… It’s all down to what works for you.

Post # 3
119 posts
Blushing bee

The average engagment is 15 months. Yours is fairly shorter than this, everyone is different. Whatever feels right for you both is all that matters. 

Post # 4
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Mount Hermon

dawnE:  Whatever’s best for you.  If you can pull it together in that long, go for it.  I would be far too stressed, so I told FI that I wanted a winter wedding and no less than 8 months to plan it. He gave me 16 months + 3 days (granted, we chose the date later, but still).

Post # 5
7030 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

msaperry:  I think the “15 month” average comes from the wedding planning industry, which naturally attracts people wanting larger weddings and longer engagements.

In my experience, 6-12 months is average. 5 months is on the short side, but I’ve known people to manage a 5 month engagement no problems.

Post # 6
1784 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

It depends on your “vision” and where you live. I live in a fairly small town, so venues don’t book up that terribly far in advance. We are having an 8 month engagement and are 4 months into it. I have pretty much everything done except some of the smaller details. A 5 month engagement is definitely doable. 

Post # 7
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I could never plan everything the way I wanted it in that short amount of time. We got engaged in May 2014 and our wedding day is October 2015. That sounded perfect to me planning-wise.

Post # 8
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I dunno, personally I never get why people find the need to hurry up and rush a wedding or marriage (aside from certain circumstances.)  I’ve loved every second of being engaged!   My fiance and I were engaged for about 14 months (getting married August 2nd, got engaged late May 2013.)  We didn’t even talk “wedding” until months after he proposed and even then we were like “hey I guess we should pick a date now, okay cool!” Granted we are very laid back people and have been dating almost 7 years now, but it didn’t make sense to try to skip over the engagement just to hurry to the inevitable! I also have had quite literally ZERO stress about planning our wedding because we had so much time. Don’t rush it is my advice, enjoy your time together.  Funny because it is pretty unheard of for people in my circle to be engaged less than a year before having a wedding.  Do what feels right for you! 

Post # 9
24 posts
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Caswell Beach- Oak Island, NC

dawnE:  DH and I had a 14 month engagement. We even moved up our wedding date from June to May and it still seemed like forever! On the flip side of that, we have mutual friends who were engaged in May and got married in August of the same year. It’s whatever suits you and your FI, and don’t let ANYONE make you feel bad for doing what you want to do.

Post # 12
2704 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015


I agree it totally depends on what you’re doing. If you’re having a smaller wedding and know what you want, you can plan it in 5 months. If you were having a 350 person traditional wedding it might be harder. If you feel like you can do it, go for it! Also, winter is the ‘off season’ of weddings so you don’t need as much time to make arrangements. I’m having a January wedding and have had a few vendors tell me to contact them in the fall because winter weddings are not as busy. Plus, you can get better deals on some stuff, so that’s a bonus.

As long as you have enough time to devote to the planning, you’ll be fine. My friend planned a summer wedding in 4 months for about 100 people- she was SUPER stressed out, but she did it.

Post # 13
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

We’ve got a 10 month engagement, and about 3 of those months we haven’t done anything at all towards the wedding! I think if you are happy, and happy you can organise it in the time, then go for it!

Post # 14
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

dawnE:  That totally makes sense then! Good for you guys! My fiance and I are only 23 but we moved in together after college when we were 22. His parents were not okay with it because they are very traditional and my dad has the complete opposite viewpoint of ‘you should live together with someone BEFORE you get married’ because that is the truest way to get to know each other fully. Hahaha needless to say, we all share the same faith but my FI and I did what we thought was best for us and our situation and it just so happen to meet halfway between what our parents wanted! Gotta love how everyone has their opinions about your individual timelines right?!? Hahaha. Your wedding sounds awesome!

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