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i've heard (so take it for what's it worth) that you shouldn't wear your engagement ring to interviews (no matter what size) b/c employers will automatically ding you for it because you will work for a year or two, have babies and quit. obviously this is a VERY general stereotype and i'm sure a lot of employers are much more sophisticated than that but it is a concern that you should think about. And i also think it depends on what type of job you're interviewing for.
What Amy said is definately something to consider, she's dead on! But, if you want to wear if to avoid being perceived as deceitful, make sure you've got a good answer for the oh so common "Where do you see yourself in 5 years" question- avoid the "married with a family" line and focus on career goals. Wearing it definately depends on your job. For my job, I'd go ahead and wear it, but would avoid talking about getting married unless asked directly.
I was always told that wedding and engagement rings are the only jewelry that is acceptable to wear on a job interview, so I don't think it's a problem to wear it. Here's my thought: if the company wants to discriminate over you because you are engaged and they are worried about you taking time off for wedding/honeymoons/children/etc., then that's probably not a good company to work for anyway. I agree with AOEBuckeye about sticking to the career path if your future plans come up in the conversation.
I say if you are in ANY doubt about this there is absolutely no harm in leaving the ring at home. There are married people everywhere it is nothing new - but consider this, in any job interview you want to minimize all the controllable/forseeable risks and if you can list all the reasons why this may be a risk then you have your answer. Thought of another way - it probably "costs" you nothing to not wear it for one day at this interview but it may cost you something if the interviewers want to put any weight (no pun intended) on the matter. What if there is a snarky person interviweing you?
All very good points!
The only thing I worry about by not wearing it, is that I may be misleading people to believe I am single. I work in a mostly male dominated field as an assistant to the CEO. You know the whole "he's having an affair with his assistant cliche..."
On the other hand, I work in LA usually for very wealthy people, where flashy items are the norm. I suppose it's all in who I interview with...!?
hey ginabean, now that i know what you are interviewing for, the ring may work to your advantage. maybe others in your field can comment. in my field, ibanking... the rule of thumb is no ring on interviews.
I recently went through the job switch during the wedding planning process (also in Los Angeles) and I interviewed with my engagement ring on. I did so because if the job was offered to me (which it was) then I wanted them to know up front I will be getting married, changing my name and that I will take a specific period of time off for the wedding & honeymoon. Well I did get the job (yay!) and we wrote into the contract my pre-arranged dates off. I didn't want to start the job and then say "surprise, I'm getting married and need 3 weeks off now". I say be up front and honest - and your ring sounds beautiful, show it off!!
Good luck! 
Oh Lord, I'd never even thought of any of this. I am going to an interview next week. If you are uncomfortable, I would turn the diamond to your palm so that you can still wear it but not be self-conscious and I echo what AOEBuckeye says, your goals should only be career based.
I think I am still going to wear mine because the office manager at the place knows me because I've done some business there and I don't want to seem deceitful. Also, I moved to live near my fiance and I don't want to seem like some flighty chick who moved all the way across the country for her boyfriend. (which I really was that chick because he didn't ask me until we got here!)
My rule of thumb with job interviews is to make sure I do everything I can to be as comfortable and confident as possible. This way your focus will be on how awesome you are and how you're the best candidate they've ever met. :)
Depends on who you are interviewing with- you might get some moron man that doesn't even notice that you are wearing an engagement ring. That being said, you could get someone on their toes and notices it. I would say if asked anything about "will you be able to perform all aspects of this position", state something along the lines that "Although I'm getting married XXX date, my personal life and plans do not interfere with my professional life nor my ability to perform my duties (list your duties here)". You will need to let them know that you will need time off for the wedding/honeymoon and I recommend offering that information during the 2nd interview- NOT the initial interview. A rule for any job interview, take any question steered toward the negative and spin it to the positive. For example: "What happens if this position turns into one of that which will require traveling? Will you be able to handle this and get permission from your future husband to travel?" To which you reply: "According to the current job description, traveling is not part of the job, however, when the time arises to reevaluate my position and for you to assign additional responsibilities I would be glad to discuss and consider as they arise, and as for asking my FH for permission- haha I don't ask his opinion regarding things that pertain to my professional development!"
Humor, quick wit and turn to the positive any question they ask. You'll rock out the interview.
I thank you so much for all of your advice- and Amy, your comment was exactly what I needed to hear!
I am getting married in October and then planning a honeymoon, so I will need time off, and if I can be up front about it and write it into my contract, even better. I can only imagine getting a job and then totally freaking out in Sept when they won't allow me to leave!lol.
Are you going to be interviewing with a man or a woman, or combination of the above? Also helps to know what field you are in. I am a Safety Engineer; my ring is a 1.6 ct yellow diamond center stone with another carat of channel set diamonds. I do not normally wear jewelry other than simple gold hoop earrings. It took the engineers that I work with TWO WEEKS to notice the the ring - don't know if they would every have gotten there, but I ended up in a meeting with one other woman (finally) and she about hyperventilated. Face it, women notice stuff like that; men don't. The women check-out clerks in Safeway noticed my ring before the men that I work with.
I would go ahead and wear it. They can't really ask you about it, you know. Once you get to the point of an actual job offer, it is appropriate to bring up any time off that you might have planned in the near future, especially if it exceeds the amount of paid vacation you will have by that point in time.
Definitely agree that it depends on where you're interviewing. Like suzanno, I'm an engineer. Hardly anyone noticed at my work when I got engaged. Two months ago when I began interviewing for a different job, the only reason anyone knew was because I mentioned my fiance. (Probably a mistake). But my friends told me after I shouldn't have worn the ring.
You can always interview w/o the ring and once you get an offer, let them know you'll need time off. That way they don't eliminate you initially but you're still being upfront. Good luck!
I actually had a similar problem, but i didnt realize it was a problem till after. I got hired at my current job before i got engaged, gave my 2 weeks notice and then got engaged on a vacation over the 2 weeks. When i showed up to start the new job, my boss immediately noticed my ring and admired it she was super nice about it. But slyly (dont even know if thats a word) said well so when will you be getting married... which i told her, the following year. And she joked how i would get preggers right after and just have babies after that. It was not said in a mean way at all - i heart my boss and she is awesome, but i wonder in the back of my mind if i would have gotten the job if i would have been engaged during the interview process...
sorry i dont think i have been of help, just letting you know what i grasped from all of my experieces 
good luck!
It can also work to your advantage! In a previous incarnation I was a recruiter/headhunter type person. One role we were interviewing was won by a newly engaged woman as she was a good fit for the job but also planning to settle down in the area, buy a house etc - he'd lost a few of his younger staff to travelling and he saw this as a sign she'd be around for a while.
Not many people have kids as soon as they get married these days, and people move around more during their careers so I think any bias against engaged women is out-dated. Doesn't mean it doesn't happen, but I never saw/heard of any in 3 years of recruitment.
You should wear your ring. It is a part of who you are and that is what theya re hiring. Also, it can amke you seem more stable. It shows that youa re at a point in your life where you are settling down, probably thinking of buying a house, so you will need a steady long term posistion. Also, you should consider that you need to tell them, if you are offered the job, up fron that you will need a certian amount of time off at such and such (or year) a date for your wedding and honeymoon. This could be a factor and it is not responsible to leave your company hanging when they are bringing you in on a current project thtat culminates that week or right after.
i agree- wear your ring. i went on about 6 interviews only a month after getting engaged last yr. my ring isnt huge but it is made of diamonds & blingy. most of the people I interviewed with were men (architecture field) and between all those interviews, only ONE person commented. A middle age male partner of the firm- the discussion of my ring included the words "I see you are betrothed", "when is the date", & "are you planning on taking off for a month around the wedding date" including an anecdote of a woman who did that before a month after getting hired. i answered smartly that we hadn't set the date yet but as soon as we did I would of course I would make vacation arrangements with my employer (not saying yes or no). now this might seem like a reason NOT to wear it- awkward conversations, old men gawking at your ring- but honestly it clued me in to that firm. Altho I understand the mentality behind the questions, that conversation definately came into play when choosing between my offers & I ended up at another firm. If it had been a woman saying, ooh that's pretty, look at mine, married working women bond type thing, that could have swayed me in the other direction.
I would just wear a plain band, if you have one. This way, it could be taken as you engaged or it could be you as a single person just wearing a plain ring. They can't ask you about your marriage status (I think it's illegal) during the interview, so it shouldn't come up. This way, if you get hired and start wearing your ering, you're not decieving them during the interview. Plus, you never know what they're thinking and deciding on (either consciously or unconciously) and you avoid all of this by not wearing your 2.1 carat ring. (As for notice off, bring this up after you get an offer.)
I do know that this snarky talk happens all over. A coworker of mine got engaged (she had already been at the company for awhile) and got a huge diamond. Talk started right away about whether she really needed to work now that she'll have a "rich" hubby and does she even deserve big raises and all of that. (I never participated in any of these talks, and tried to defend her when I could, but talk still happens.)
Good luck!
anaj95, I think a plain band could be mis-interpreted. They may think that you are married already. Yes, they cannot ask you about it, but I think that if you do get an offer and ask for time off, then the employer may think you were trying to be deceitful.
Snarky comments will be made no matter what - if they think the ring is too big, too small, too plain, too nontraditional. I think the important thing is to wear it and be honest about who you are.
I probably wouldnt have even thought about my ring during the interview process, but my advice is this:
Do what makes you FEEL most confident about yourself during the interview process. If your ring/ring size makes you feel self concious, or makes you feel like people are talking about you, it might show. So if thats the case, wear a band, and once you got hired cause youre so confident and talented, pop that sucker back on and let everyone gawk with envy :)
hahaha. I dont think you should consider what other people think, but if it affects your interviewing skills/self conciousness, you might as well just take it off. Its all about how YOU feel about yourself.
Well you don't want to screw with your chances of getting an offer, but on the other hand you don't want to get hired without mentioning your upcoming wedding and then discover they won't give you any time off. If you're going to need time off for the wedding/honeymoon, it is best to discuss this with them before you sign on the dotted line, and get the vacation time written into the contract. If they're not willing to offer you the time off, then it's probably better to know now so that you can find work elsewhere. Honestly, if they want you badly enough, they will make concessions like giving you time off for a wedding.
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Sport that rock! Employers can't and shouldn't discriminate against you and if they did because of your ring than you don't want to work for them anyway!
This is a very relevant post for me too. I just started a graduate program that requires I do a summer internship- and I'm getting married this summer. Stupid I know, but its too late now. It's going to be pretty awkward to ask for that time off but I do agree that you should wear your ring. Hardly anyone has kids right away anymore and it might be perceived as you being a more mature person.
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i just went through this - i applied for an internship, and i met and interviewed with three or four different women that i'd be working under. it came up with one of these women that we were both getting married this summer - me in may, and her in june. it then got around to the rest of the office... oops. i second guessed that decision, as i worried that they'd dismiss me because i was getting married and would need time off. however, i got the job anyways, so it all worked out. :)
i would wear my ring, but i wouldn't talk about it unless directly asked, and i don't think many bosses would directly ask. :)
I recently interviewed for a residency program while being engaged. I decided not to wear my ring (doesn't matter what size it is) when I interviewed outside NYC and to wear it when I interviewed in NYC. I learned this when I interviewed in Philadelphia, which is only 2 hours away. The interviewer commented on the fact that I probably would choose a position in NYC over their's. Because of that they would be less likely to consider me. I was okay wearing the ring at NYC interviews because the interviewers would see that I have a reason to stay in the city. However, at an interview out of state, I did not wear a ring, but the interviewer kept prying.... Are you married?....Do you have a boyfriend? Yes, those are all totally inappropriate questions, but they still ask. It was very important to me that I didn't give them any reason to rank me lower, and it was not a big deal not to wear the ring for a day. Unfortunately, some employers do discriminate. It all depends on your field too.
im probably in the minority here, but i would wear it (with pride) and before any questions popped off about "so are you married, are you engaged blah blah blah" from them, i'd volunteer that i am getting married - just so we're not dancing around it.
b/c in most cases, they want to know = and you want to tell them, kwim?
dont sell yourself short - your qualifications should speak for themselves and if you're getting married -so the f what? if you want to have kids and take maternity leave, so the f what? if they are truly interested and are living in the reality that yes, people do need time off for personal matter, they will focus more on you and not your upcoming request for vacation!! good luck on your interview!!
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dont wear it - if you read any job interview type books, 99/100, they will tell you to not wear it - keep distractions to a minimum (being married,engaged, etc., is completely personal and it is illegal to ask) - they're there to see how awesome you are and what an asset you would be to their company - not whether or not you're available/going to leave and have babies, etc. Good luck!
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I tried searching for similiar posts, and found that a couple weeks ago there were posts regarding snarky co-workers discussing diamond sizes.
I've been engaged for about 6 months and my co-workers (all men) were very excited for me, and congratulated my Fiance on such a beautiful ring, and joked with me, that now that I had a "huge rock" would I still be working. haha. whatever...it's all in good fun from people who've known us for years, and know we're SO not like that.
Anyway, my company has merged and is moving to another country, so I am about to start the interviewing process and looking for a new job. I am small with tiny fingers (size 4) and my ring is 2.1ct solitaire. I am a tiny bit concerned about interviewing with it on, I am wondering if I should just wear a band. Maybe this sounds completely crazy?
Anyone been through this situation, or know what is appropriate, or should I not worry about it and be proud and happy with my man and my ring, as I am every day:) Thanks....