Engagement ring to an Interview?

posted 10 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
212 posts
Helper bee

i’ve heard (so take it for what’s it worth) that you shouldn’t wear your engagement ring to interviews (no matter what size) b/c employers will automatically ding you for it because you will work for a year or two, have babies and quit.  obviously this is a VERY general stereotype and i’m sure a lot of employers are much more sophisticated than that but it is a concern that you should think about.  And i also think it depends on what type of job you’re interviewing for.

Post # 4
Member
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

What Amy said is definately something to consider, she’s dead on!  But, if you want to wear if to avoid being perceived as deceitful, make sure you’ve got a good answer for the oh so common "Where do you see yourself in 5 years" question- avoid the "married with a family" line and focus on career goals.  Wearing it definately depends on your job.  For my job, I’d go ahead and wear it, but would avoid talking about getting married unless asked directly.

Post # 5
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I was always told that wedding and engagement rings are the only jewelry that is acceptable to wear on a job interview, so I don’t think it’s a problem to wear it.  Here’s my thought: if the company wants to discriminate over you because you are engaged and they are worried about you taking time off for wedding/honeymoons/children/etc., then that’s probably not a good company to work for anyway.  I agree with AOEBuckeye about sticking to the career path if your future plans come up in the conversation. 

Post # 6
Member
67 posts
Worker bee

I say if you are in ANY doubt about this there is absolutely no harm in leaving the ring at home.  There are married people everywhere it is nothing new – but consider this, in any job interview you want to minimize all the controllable/forseeable risks and if you can list all the reasons why this may be a risk then you have your answer.  Thought of another way – it probably "costs" you nothing to not wear it for one day at this interview but it may cost you something if the interviewers want to put any weight (no pun intended) on the matter.  What if there is a snarky person interviweing you?

Post # 8
Member
212 posts
Helper bee

hey ginabean, now that i know what you are interviewing for, the ring may work to your advantage.  maybe others in your field can comment.  in my field, ibanking… the rule of thumb is no ring on interviews.

Post # 9
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

I recently went through the job switch during the wedding planning process (also in Los Angeles) and I interviewed with my engagement ring on.  I did so because if the job was offered to me (which it was) then I wanted them to know up front I will be getting married, changing my name and that I will take a specific period of time off for the wedding & honeymoon.  Well I did get the job (yay!) and we wrote into the contract my pre-arranged dates off.  I didn’t want to start the job and then say "surprise, I’m getting married and need 3 weeks off now".  I say be up front and honest – and your ring sounds beautiful, show it off!!

Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2008

Oh Lord, I’d never even thought of any of this.  I am going to an interview next week.  If you are uncomfortable, I would turn the diamond to your palm so that you can still wear it but not be self-conscious and I echo what AOEBuckeye says, your goals should only be career based.

I think I am still going to wear mine because the office manager at the place knows me because I’ve done some business there and I don’t want to seem deceitful.   Also, I moved to live near my fiance and I don’t want to seem like some flighty chick who moved all the way across the country for her boyfriend. (which I really was that chick because he didn’t ask me until we got here!)

Post # 11
Member
177 posts
Blushing bee

My rule of thumb with job interviews is to make sure I do everything I can to be as comfortable and confident as possible. This way your focus will be on how awesome you are and how you’re the best candidate they’ve ever met. 🙂  

Post # 12
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2008

Depends on who you are interviewing with- you might get some moron man that doesn’t even notice that you are wearing an engagement ring. That being said, you could get someone on their toes and notices it. I would say if asked anything about "will you be able to perform all aspects of this position", state something along the lines that "Although I’m getting married XXX date, my personal life and plans do not interfere with my professional life nor my ability to perform my duties (list your duties here)". You will need to let them know that you will need time off for the wedding/honeymoon and I recommend offering that information during the 2nd interview- NOT the initial interview. A rule for any job interview, take any question steered toward the negative and spin it to the positive. For example: "What happens if this position turns into one of that which will require traveling? Will you be able to handle this and get permission from your future husband to travel?" To which you reply: "According to the current job description, traveling is not part of the job, however, when the time arises to reevaluate my position and for you to assign additional responsibilities I would be glad to discuss and consider as they arise, and as for asking my FH for permission- haha I don’t ask his opinion regarding things that pertain to my professional development!"

Humor, quick wit and turn to the positive any question they ask. You’ll rock out the interview.

Post # 14
Member
2293 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

Are you going to be interviewing with a man or a woman, or combination of the above?  Also helps to know what field you are in.  I am a Safety Engineer; my ring is a 1.6 ct yellow diamond center stone with another carat of channel set diamonds.  I do not normally wear jewelry other than simple gold hoop earrings.  It took the engineers that I work with TWO WEEKS to notice the the ring – don’t know if they would every have gotten there, but I ended up in a meeting with one other woman (finally) and she about hyperventilated.  Face it, women notice stuff like that; men don’t.  The women check-out clerks in Safeway noticed my ring before the men that I work with.

I would go ahead and wear it.  They can’t really ask you about it, you know.  Once you get to the point of an actual job offer, it is appropriate to bring up any time off that you might have planned in the near future, especially if it exceeds the amount of paid vacation you will have by that point in time.

Post # 15
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Definitely agree that it depends on where you’re interviewing.  Like suzanno, I’m an engineer.  Hardly anyone noticed at my work when I got engaged.  Two months ago when I began interviewing for a different job, the only reason anyone knew was because I mentioned my fiance.  (Probably a mistake).  But my friends told me after I shouldn’t have worn the ring. 

 You can always interview w/o the ring and once you get an offer, let them know you’ll need time off.  That way they don’t eliminate you initially but you’re still being upfront.  Good luck!

Post # 16
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

I actually had a similar problem, but i didnt realize it was a problem till after. I got hired at my current job before i got engaged, gave my 2 weeks notice and then got engaged on a vacation over the 2 weeks. When i showed up to start the new job, my boss immediately noticed my ring and admired it  she was super nice about it. But slyly (dont even know if thats a word) said well so when will you be getting married… which i told her, the following year. And she joked how i would get preggers right after and just have babies after that. It was not said in a mean way at all – i heart my boss and she is awesome, but i wonder in the back of my mind if i would have gotten the job if i would have been engaged during the interview process…

sorry i dont think i have been of help, just letting you know what i grasped from all of my experieces  good luck!

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