Engagement talk with the parents

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: What do you think I should do regarding 'the engagement talk' with my parents?
    Leave 'the talk' up to him, that's his responsibility : (28 votes)
    61 %
    Have 'the talk' together to clear the air. Just deal with the awkwardness. : (7 votes)
    15 %
    Don't have the talk; just wait until he's proposed : (10 votes)
    22 %
    Other (comment below) : (1 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    112 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I would just leave the talk up to him. He was super nervous as well for the same reasons your BF is but it went fine in the end!

    Post # 4
    2355 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    If your SO wants to ask them before he proposes, let him. Otherwise, the two of you can talk to them after you get engaged.

    Post # 5
    3394 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @copperbird90:  I think he should have the talk, to show respect. Since you already live together and they’re apparently fine with that I think it’ll be fine. Just tell SO to relax and get it over with.

    Post # 6
    451 posts
    Helper bee

    @copperbird90:  I think sometimes the guy really wants to be traditional and speak with the father, but usually they do it because they feel they have to. I mean geez, you’re living together, did he ask permission for that?  So it really boils down to respect for your parents. You say they are taciturn. What do you think your parents would prefer?  My ex-husband (I was 23) asked my dad and mom together. I was inside peeking out the window. They were horrifyingly uncomfortable. I’ll never put them through that again. Once we are engaged SO and I will call both sets of parents with the good news. Of course both sides know it’s in the works just not when it’s happening. Hmmmm, neither do I.   Bygones. Anyway, I certainly don’t think it’s the guys problem in 2013. It’s something you decide together. 


    PS – Stop obsessing about what your mom thinks (age, etc). Your parents will love you even if they aren’t thrilled with every choice you make. I’m not particularly religious but the idea of leaving your parents to cleave to the side of your husband makes for a tight bond. 

    Post # 7
    1233 posts
    Bumble bee

    Ask him if he wants to do it alone or as a couple. Leave it up to him. Personally, if I have my way, we will do it as a couple.

    Post # 9
    204 posts
    Helper bee

    I’m not sure. See I’m scared to death that he won’t get my parents blessing because we want to marry sooner rather than later. Have Any of you not received their blessing? I need to be prepared for whatever happens. 

    Post # 11
    3394 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @copperbird90:  I hope your dad won’t shoot him! lol!

    Post # 12
    980 posts
    Busy bee

    I bet they already expect him to propose soon(ish) so it would be more a show of respect than anything else. I’d leave this up to him. I’m sure he will be fine. 🙂

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