Post # 1
My DH and I are childless and do not plan on having children…..personal choice that we are both happy with….
My DH has a few friends that are married with children. One of these friends is looking to have a dinner in a few weeks to celebrate the holidays. The dinner will consist of 3 or four couples (children are all staying home)….
My issue is that every dinner that we have, the women just sit there and talk, and talk, and talk about their kids….. I try to change the subject but it goes right back to kids…. So I end up bored to tears or talking to the guys (with the wives giving me a less than pleasant look)…….
Anyone else have this situation? Any ideas on how to get the topic to be something other than kids?????
Post # 3
@californiabride2013: Why not just talk to the guys? The women obviously want to talk about their children (which I agree is boring), so I don’t know if you’re going to be able to change that. Take my opinion with a grain of salt though, I usually end up talking/hanging out with the guys (I prefer video games to make-up).
Post # 4
@californiabride2013: If this is constant, I’d probably be non – PC and say something like, “I know that your world centers around your children – and it should – but since I don’t have anything to add to this conversation, I’ll just go talk sports with the guys.”
Then again, we may not be invited back to any more dinner parties.
Post # 5
Ugh I’d be so bored too. Do these women have no lives outside of their kids? That’s pretty pathetic, and I’d go talk to the guys too.
Post # 6
@californiabride2013: I definetly have this problem as well. Unfortunately it has led me to avoid those situations I guess. I am in a book club that meets monthly, and without fail – it is all talk about their kids. Now I only go once every few months. I love my friends dearly, but I am bored to tears just sitting there listening to them talk kids!
Post # 7
Do you know anything about these women? I’d maybe try to talk about their hobbies if you know of any. I wouldn’t completely avoid talking about their kids (it’s a big part of their lives) but surely they have other interest? Maybe try to focus on that??
Post # 8
@californiabride2013: Yeah, honestly I wouldn’t go out of my way to make these women comfortable if ALL they talk about is their kids. I would say something like what @fascinated: said and talk to the guys.
Ugh, women like this drive me batty. I have plenty of friends with kids, and these firends actually cherish the opportunity to get out of the house and talk about adult things not related to poopie diapers and best breastfeeding pumps. :/
Post # 9
@californiabride2013: I start talking about my dog and how similar he can be to a child.
A few times I’ve had someone say, “Yeah but it’s not the same.” and I respond with, “All we ever talk about is kids. I don’t want to sit here quietly, I want to be included too.”
Then the subject gets changed. It’s worked 3 or 4 times now!
Post # 10
If your efforts to change the subject are being brushed off, I would talk to the husbands and ignore their stares. Clearly they’re oblivious to the fact that they’re the reason you’re talking to their husbands, maybe having your husband casually mention it to one of the other guys may help? He may tell his wife and they could clue in…
Post # 12
@Chrysoberyl: Great response. Im just imagining the looks if the conversation drifted to dog poop. 🙂
Post # 13
Are they sahms? If so, they are likely to bond over that. Most of my friends have kids and want to talk to them about that- and since their world is ALL About their children, why not? Why don’t you two just make different friends more suited to your situation?
Post # 14
Story of my life. Either develop a passing interest in their kids, or deal with the dirty looks. I choose the latter, because until we actually have kids, I don’t want to hear any more delivery nightmare stories.
Post # 15
I have a really different experience tbh! I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. The women I know with kids do talk about them, but most of the time when they’re out they’re happy to talk about other things outside of babies! I think they relish the adult conversation.
I would do what other pps suggested! They have to realize on some level that it’s not polite to only talk about children when someone in the group doesn’t have any. Make them uncomfortable enough that they remember it (I would want someone to reign me in if I was too focused on only one subject).
Hope it gets better!!
Post # 16
@californiabride2013: I HATE that. Everyone around FI & I are starting to TTC, pregnant, or have kids and they act like anything that doesnt have to do with their kids is non existent. FI gets so annoyed and so do I. I have no advice to you unfortunately because I just have to grin & bear it when all they want to discuss is pregnancy and babies.