Estranged friend

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
183 posts
Blushing bee

Gift sets from Crabtree & Evelyn…Beauty/make up sets from Sephora or a good brand? These are the kind of generic gifts I would give a female friend. 

Post # 3
Member
2368 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Gift cards are always a good option too.

Post # 4
Member
1244 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

It seems dishonest to keep up the charade when you don’t want to be friends with her anymore. Why not just decline the invite?

Post # 5
Member
954 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I would just give a generic gift card. Like to the movies or something.

Post # 6
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

squirrelbun:  First of all, that’s super passive aggressive of you. Instead of playing these weird games with yourself, why don’t you talk to her??? I don’t really think it’s fair of you, regardless of her behavior. Why aren’t you brave enough to have a convo about her bad-friend behavior?

As far as a gift, anything from Sephora is always appreciated with most girls. 

Post # 7
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m really confused…..if you know she isn’t being malicious, why wouldn’t you just talk to her? It seems ridiculous to throw away a 15 year friendship over something so trivial, particularly when you acknowledge that’s just how she is. 

I agree with PP that you are acting extremely passive aggressive.

Post # 8
Member
6510 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

If you know she is not purposely being malicious I don’t understand why you would drop a friend of 15 years. I also don’t understand why you don’t just talk to her instead of playing games. If you don’t want to be friends anymore don’t go to her birthday party. It seems mean to ‘lead her on’ like this.

Post # 9
Member
43 posts
Newbee

I agree with everyone else…you shouldn’t just drop her as a friend.

I’m the exact same way socially. I’m extremely bad with initiating contact, even though I love my friends. For me, I act this way out of insecurity. I went through a period when I was a kid where I didn’t have many friends, and it made me completely insecure with future friends. Even though I know it’s ridiculous, I don’t often plan to do things with my friends out of fear that no one wants to hang out with me, and they’ll say no. But when they reach out to me, I always say yes!

I’m not saying this is true for your friend, just saying that there are multiple reasons she acts like this. Not everyone knows how to act socially, and it doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about you.

 

 

Post # 10
Member
1878 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Valparaiso, IN

If you really have given up on the friendship then dont get her anything. Maybe that will help her wake up.

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