- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
My daughter is getting married this September, and the planning process has been extremely painful for us, thanks to the groom’s mother, sister, and sister-in-law. In an effort to try and include his family as much as possible, my daughter opted to have his sister (Bridesmaid) and his older brother’s children in the wedding as flower girls. (They are 3 and 5, undisciplined and out of control–keep this in mind!)
We opted to have her shower as an adult only affair, which has basically caused a family feud, as these children MUST be at the center of everything that goes on, and received MUCH criticism for making this known, by the mother, sister and the girl’s mother–his oldest brother’s wife. We were accused of being child haters, of breaking the children’s hearts, and that as flower girls, it was MANDATORY that they attend the shower. Let it also be said that his sister decided to not be in the wedding over this, and also that the shower is being given by myself (MOB) and the other bridesmaids, but of course, I am paying for the majority. It will also be held in a nice restaurant, and is not a picnic or backyard event!
The groom has gotten into shouting matches with his mother and sister over this, so much so, that they had actually thought it may be best to pull the children out of the wedding, but the family insinuated that if that happened, that his family would not be attending the wedding. He has been supportive of my daughter the entire way, but the family is so boneheaded, (CONTROLLING!!!) there is no reasoning with them at all. The last wedding that these children were in, they were allowed to run back and forth in front of the church, over the bride’s train, and the family thought that was simply “adorable”, and I think that is horrible, and inexcusable, personally. Yep–that’s what we are dealing with!! My daughter has tried compromising with them, saying that the older child (5) could be at the shower, and the younger one could come at the end with the groom. Their mother says that that is ridiculous, and she won’t attend a shower that her “FAMILY” cannot be included in. (Sits while the children run like demons at family events, BTW). Personally, daughter and I are saying HALLELUJAH! LOLOL, and she will be able to enjoy her day as planned, but the rest of the family (his mother in particular) made the statement that “She could not sit and pretend to enjoy herself at an event where her grandchildren were not included”…may cause problems. It matters not that they’ve been reminded that this day is NOT about them, but about the bride/groom…they are so unreal, and to put it bluntly, crazy.
I am at a complete loss here. Thoughts?