Ever NOT received a thank you card after giving a wedding gift?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Have you ever NOT received a thank you card after giving a wedding gift?
    No! I don't know anyone so rude. I have ALWAYS received a thank you card! : (32 votes)
    11 %
    Yes, but it has only happened one time. Everyone else sent a card. : (106 votes)
    37 %
    Yes, I have gifted toward 2 or more weddings where I did NOT receive a thank you card. : (132 votes)
    46 %
    I have NEVER received a thank you card after gifting toward a wedding! My friends are jerks. :( : (16 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5246 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I was IN a wedding last year and gave a generous gift as well as my time in helping with the wedding and have not received a thank you card to this day (the wedding was last year) I find it incredibly rude not to receive one..espcially if you were in the bridal party!!

    Post # 4
    Member
    1737 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    He laughed? At least have the good sense to appear contrite … men. Tongue Out I am wracking my brain, but I had to vote No – I have always received a card (even though some cards have come waaaay after the fact, like a year later). Better late than never!

    Post # 5
    Member
    11242 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    /hand raise I have never received a thank you card. I’ve been to 4-5 weddings as an adult and not once has anyone thanked me for so much as coming. FI was in a wedding a couple of years ago and barely got a gift for that, much less a thank you. I know that sounds awful, but the groomsmen got flip flops (to wear for the ceremony, but FI hates flip flops), a bucket (like a heavier sand toy bucket), and a coozie (which, I admit, is cute because it has whales on it). Aside from the flip flops, which I think are at FI’s mom’s house, the rest has been in his trunk for two years.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2335 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    Yep, other family members got a card but FI and I did not.  I sent an expensive gift to their house and worry that it didn’t arrive, but I don’t want to ask.

    On an old thread, a bee posted something very telling: You might not remember getting a thank you card but you certainly remember not getting one.

    Post # 7
    Member
    11328 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    My brother and sister in law didn’t send out thank you cards. But honestly, no one was that shocked. My brother is a typical guy (would never do it on his own) and his wife was 21 at the time and was so NOT into wedding planning or anything wedding related. Best guess is she never even thought of it.

    Post # 8
    Member
    3627 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I think all of the weddings we’ve attended in the past few years never had thank you cards, whether it was stuff from their traditional registry or their honeymoon registry. I also didn’t get a bridal shower thank you card either. However, I just received a thank you card from someone whose wedding we can’t attend but sent a gift to.

    With the advent of shipping gifts directly to people instead of dropping it off at at the wedding, I wish they would at least text me or call me to thank me so I know it’s been received.

    Post # 9
    Member
    288 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    This has happened multiple times to me — even in instances where I was not able to go to the wedding but still sent a gift! It bugs the crap out of me!

    Post # 10
    Member
    13890 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Yup!  I was pretty put off for a while.  This persons wedding was 2 weeks after ours.  We arent super closer, the bride is a college friends of my husbands.  So you’d think that with planning a wedding yourself as well, you’d be kind enough to first RSVP, and second, send a thank you note!!!  

    And another time is just recently within a month, but I’m giving that one a little more time.  I sent a check, which hasnt been cashed yet so I’m starting to wonder if it got to them yet…

    Post # 11
    Member
    5664 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Yup, most of the weddings I’ve gone to and even been in I never got a thing. My best friend who’s wedding was in 2010 actually sent her thank you cards two days before their one year anniversary. Sorry people but no matter what google says you do not have a year to send thank you’s! My mom and another family friend she invited to her wedding actually called to ask me, is her new last name this? I don’t know who this is from!

    Post # 12
    Member
    11242 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @CorgiTales:  I had no idea how important they were until I came here. Not that I wouldn’t have done them–I did thank you cards for my graduation party (hell, I gave one to my neighbors, who I had no idea knew that I was graduating, but gave me a card and cash!)–but I just never realized that it’s a HUGE deal.

    Post # 13
    Member
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Yes. Twice.

    Once i gave a bottle of champagne and £100 cheque to a friend. Not even a verbal thank you when I saw the bride the month after.

    Second one was to a good friend. I gave her a cheque also, a money pot and a bottle of champagne. Again, she didn’t even say thank you in person. She’s coming to my wedding this month although I have a feeling that she may not give me anything more than her presence lol.

     

    Post # 14
    Member
    1769 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I went to four weddings last year and only got a thank you for one. One I can excuse (a little) – the bride was pregnant and gave birth only four months later, and had a big move at the same time. The others? Not so much. I was brought up to write a thank you for everything, so I definitely notice. On the other hand, I have a friend getting married later this summer and she wrote me two thank yous for the same shower gift – I guess she really liked it Tongue Out

    Post # 15
    Member
    715 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I was IN a wedding for my best friend a few years ago and never got a thank you gift.  The rest of our friends did (who weren’t in the bridal party) and my parents got a thank you card, but I never got one.  The fact that everyone else got their thank you cards 11 months after the wedding makes me think she couldn’t be bothered to write a card for the bridal party to whom she had already given gifts.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1128 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    We have gone to several weddings, bridal showers, baby showers, birthday parties etc and have not received a thank you card yet! Like WTF?! Most recently I sent a gift to my neice for her birthday, I didn’t even get a thank you via phone or text…I think that’s so rude. I send thank you’s out for every stupid little thing.

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