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I know people are crazy! On our wedding day, people were asking when we were going to have kids!
same here - we were at hubbys aunts funeral and at the wake the greek priest put someones baby in my arms and started lecturing me about how its my duty as a women to god to have children
it happened at every family (his side greek) function for at least a year
Yeah, we get the comments constantly, my parents want to be grandparents, and my sisters want to be Aunts so so bad ... Me and DH are not trying not to conceive, but since I was on depo until 5 months ago, not thinking things will happen too soon, and are totally okay with it.
It is annoying to be asked about it all the time though ...
DH and I were at a gathering last night, and even though I didn't really feel liking having any alcohol, I made sure to have a beer so that I wouldn't get people asking if I wasn't drinking because there was a bun in the oven.
Honestly people, sometimes I just don't want to have anything to drink.
I'm not even married yet and my FFIL told FI that he was expecting us to give him some grandkids. Not that he doesn't have any, it's just FI's older sister lives quite a few hours away and FI's brother adopted his wife's two kids, and they're horrible.
I also got the speech that it will be my duty as a married woman to give my husband children... Gag me.
FI's aunt told me that I look like I'll be a good mother, and that my hips are perfect for an easy childbirth... Huh?! I just met the woman and she's talking about my hips?
So yeah, not even married and we're getting the baby stuff. Of course, FMIL is 1 of 13 children. FFIL is 1 of like, 7. Most everyone has at least 2 children, some are up to 5... I guess it's expected.
I get when are you having a baby questins all the time.
I got 2 hours of sleep one night last week and came into work the next day obviously dragging and a coworker came up to me and said..."So are we going to hear the pitter patter of little feet soon?"
Ummm no. I'm just tired. Also waaaay rude on your part to even make that assumption. I don't think I have ever asked anyone if they were pregnant even if they phsyically looked like they had a bump. I would be soooooo embarrassed if I was wrong.
Bwahaha my ffil does this all the time, and I mean EVERY time we visit him. Granted our situation is slightly different (we already have a kid, and aren't really planning for any more atm). He is generally an easy going guy with whom we will drink on occasion (like wine/beer with supper etc), and every time I have a drink he will say "..So... I guess you're still not pregnant." very matter of fact-ly. The other good one is : "..you know, four is a good age." "A good age for what?" "To be a sibling!" ... right.
My FMIL just had a visit with us and she was pretty persistent about this too, constantly saying things like "oh I would love to have several [grandchildren]" or "you know your BIL isn't seeing anyone and hasn't finished university so I am leaving it up to you & J to fill the gran-baby quota."
But my mom can be just as bad, dropping "hints" about how sad it is to be an only child etc -- but I am blunt as a brick wall with her, plus both my siblings are expecting, so she has had something to distract her lately.
I think the worst I have heard was "..so, you have provided the heir, when are you going to pop out the spare?" D:
People are crazy.
This weekend I went home (3 hour drive away) to do some Christmas shopping, yesterday just me and my mom and sister were out shopping and I found out my sister is already crocheting hats, boots, blankets, etc for when me and DH have a baby, and that my dad has already bought a camouflage onesie (he likes to hunt) and has it stored away waiting for a grandbaby to put it on ... I love that they are so excited, but the pressure might just kill me 
Every time I'm not feeling 100%, my mom asks if I'm pregnant. Apparently newly married women aren't allowed to just feel under the weather!
@Mrs.KMM: ha, I got food poisioning last night so I sent work an email to let them know I would be in later. I woke up feeling fine, but I was tired from being up most of the night.
Some people apparently think food poisoning is code word for morning sickness.
Sheesh, I hadn't gotten any baby comments thus far ... but there have been 4 or 5 this weekend.
I also put on 3 pounds from eating all of my baking I've been doing, thankfully it isn't visible (I'm a little on the heavy side already), because goodness knows that would get people talking too I bet.
@guitargirl: It could be because of where you live. Where I live, it's the norm for people to wait until their 30's to have kids. It's the "oldest" average age to marry, as well. So nobody expects us to have kids for at least 5 more years - hence no pressure. In the mid-West and South, the averages for marriage age and age at first child are the lowest in the country, hence people's expectations are that you'd be having kids sooner. People are just feeding off of societal norms - but definitely buck them if you want! :-)
i've only gotten it twice--once while we were at my husband's high school reunion over thanksgiving and i stopped drinking after 2 drinks. his friend's gf was like, "are you not drinking for a specific reason?" all knowingly, and it's like, umm, no, i just had a drink, chill out! the other time was just last night, i was telling my best friend that i hadn't felt well on saturday and right away she was like, "are you pregnant?" um, no!
haha, but on the other hand, i DO notice i've been talking about my niece a lot lately...
i know, it's crazy. when my sister got married people would not leave them alone about when they were going to have babies, and my sister was only 20 when she got married! it's crazy! people have asked me too since i've been married. one time i mentioned i was having weird dreams and someone told me to "go take a pregnancy test" wtf?? a lot of people ask us about babies, but i just say "in a few years" if i'm feeling nice, or tell them i want to finish school first, but you don't have to tell anyone anything, you don't owe anyone an explination. i think people just ask out of curiousity, but it does get annoying.
We've gotten several comments, mostly from his side of the family. FI is 11 years older than me and has 2 nieces & 1 nephew... and his mom is ready for more grandbabies!
FI was playing with his youngest niece (3 years old) and he was all smiles. His sister nudged me and told me he was ready for one of his own.
Haha, maybe AFTER the wedding. Several years after the wedding...
I NEVER got asked these questions! I guess people naturally assumed that I wasnt going to have kids, ever or anytime soon...little did they or I know...
@MissAsB: Same here. I commented on how cute our niece is and my new stepsister-in-law goes, "Now you guys just need to make one!" Uh, no thanks!
We've been married for almost five months and have yet to receive a single comment, thank goodness. These are ridiculous, I can't even imagine that newlyweds are getting grief just for catching a cold or having a hangover or refraining from drinking. I do think it's cultural/regional of course; people in my/my husband's circles rarely have kids soon after getting married, and often wait until they're older in general. I think if we were to have kids now, more people would be stunned than anything else. My younger cousin and his new wife from rural Alabama, on the other hand - I'd imagine people (ie my inquisitive grandmother) are bugging them all the time.
I thought of one more thing- if you're a newlywed, you can't have good news without people thinking you're pregnant. Sometimes I find this annoying, but sometimes it's kind of funny. I often have "good news" but it's often little things. "Hey, good news!" Person perks up. "Gas is down to 2.59." Person disappointed. But people who know me should know I get excited about little things.
I just have to say that I went to DH's holiday party last night and was basically cornered by two of his (male!) coworkers and told about the "miracle of children" and that I basically need to start popping out babies ASAP. I was like, ummm thanks for your input?
I get comments ALL.THE.TIME. And it's EVERYWHERE.I.GO. Seriously, if I'm with my husband's family, every five seconds there is a comment. "Are you sure you should be having a drink? Are you guys pregnant yet?" Or if we are talking about an event in the future "Maybe you'll be pregnant by then." They keep having bets as to when we'll get pregnant (the first one is that I would have a baby, in hand, by my first anniversary, which was this past May. I'm not even pregnant yet!).
It can be funny at times, but when you receive comments from everyone all the time, it can be tiring. I used to get a ton of comments from the owner of my company but then I made a wiseass comment how I had too much work to do, and I'm sure he'd hate to hear that I need four months off to have a baby. After that, he shut up! (Not my reasoning for not having a baby, and when I do want to have a baby, time off from work won't matter. But it shut him up!)
The most surprising thing is how common it is for people to ask when we're having a baby.
DH and I get comments all the time! I hate it! Even at our RD people were asking when we were going to have a baby, my mom hints all the time, all of dh's family hints, even my boss was asking my co workers. If I send my mom an e-mail saying "hey I have something to tell you" she immediately calls me and her first words are usually "do you have a due date yet?" and when I say no she gets mad and hangs up!
All that has made DH swear that we are going to keep when we are preggo a secret as long as we can, and we want to surprise all our parents. or just play a trick on them to get back at them for all the annoying baby nagging!
haha, my partners uncle asked me point blank last night "..so when are you guys having the next one?" ...while I was cleaning up kid sick..
I just started laughing and said "..you know, right now I think one is enough."
@crayfish: I am in Boston, too, but I did get those comments. And we're not even married yet! They usually come from friends with kids.
We went out for drinks one night with FH's friends from work. I had a couple of drinks, but when one guy wanted to order another round I ordered Ginger Ale. I had to work the next day and was the designated driver. Another of FH's friends didn't hear me ordering my soda, so he just called out to the waitress that everyone was having the same. FH told him that I didn't want to drink anymore. The friend's face instantly lit up and he got all excited, so that I had to tell him to chill out and no, I'm not pregnant, just employed.
Oh man. I definitely know where you're coming from.
My FI's family is Hungarian, he only has one brother, but that brother and his wife haven't been able to have children. So I have been informed that the responsibility for passing on the family name rests on our shoulders / my womb. His mother alternates between wishing for grandkids, and urging us to wait, finish our uni degrees, buy a house, etc. It's cute, because she's sweet about it, but I can only imagine how pushy some parents are. >.>
Those questions/thoughts don't bother me since we are TTC. My only slight annoyance/sadness with those questions is that it reminds me that my body is still not working properly after going off of BC over 6 months ago.
FI and I are getting married 2 weeks from today, and we having been dealing with these questions FOR YEARS! And we're both 22! My future in laws are older than my parents (they had FI at 30 after trying for 10 years!) so they are pushing the grandkids' train hard.
So they started TTC at 20, and my parents started TTC at 21 (and were successful on the 1st try), so you can imagine that the pressure for me is insane. My younger cousin got married this summer (she's 20) and my grandmother started looking at me like I was an old maid. She would introduce us as her "married granddaughter and her unmarried one, though they've been dating 6 years so I don't know what their wait is for because I'd like to see great-grandchildren before I die" She would say this to complete strangers.
My FMIL asks us every time we visit, which is weekly, how soon we are going to start TTC and how many kids we want and if we've picked out names for our nonexistant children yet. Names?!? Really?! These kids aren't even conceived, much less born!
So I just know we're going to get a call in the middle of our honeymoon, my DH will answer, and some family member on the other end will yell out, "Have you knocked her up yet?!?" ugh.
i actually haven't been asked yet. Although i suspect that when we go to my husband's mother's side family Easter, it'll be the hot topic of the day. Even before we were married his Greek family was wondering when we were going to have a baby to bring to Greek Easter!
That aside, My husband's mom has actually asked us to hold off from having kids. She said she feels the first few years of marriage ought to be for getting to know each other, settling in, working out financing, etc. But she is also of the opinion that most people ought to wait til their 30's to have kids because otherwise they miss out on a lot of the 20's fun. Whereas I want out first kid before I am 30.
Oh man I got those questions a lot and HATED it. Maybe if I felt I was ready for such a life-changing event, the comments would have only been an annoyance. *sigh* You'd think in this century people would finally be over the mentality that marriage = babies. Thankfully for me, at 4 months past our wedding, those comments are now few and far between.
Hehe, I was talking to my mom on the phone the other day, and she could hear me crunching something, so she's says "What are you eating?" Me: Pickles.
"OOOOOH, will we be hearing the pitter patter of little feet soon?"
Nope, I'm pretty sure I just have PMS, and a crazy salt craving.
I was just talking to a friend about this yesterday! The FIRST time I met DH's family (they live 1000 miles away, so it was for a longer visit), his mom started asking about kids. There's been all sorts of comments since then, but the one that got me most was when I was holding my cousin's 6 month old at my *wedding* of all places, my grandmother walked up to tell me "those look real good on you" (!).
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I can't do anything without getting baby comments. For example:
I wasn't feeling good today- people assume I am pregnant.
People hear we have been married a little over a year- "how soon are you going to have kids?"
I talk about wanting a dog- "oh, is this practice for having a baby soon?"
I am so tired of hearing this. What can't you do/talk about without everyone thinking you're pregnant?