Everytime I Go Into My Boss' Office ….

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
757 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@future_mrs_sommer:  I completely understand why you’d feel timid about speaking to him! However, you’re right – its just something you have to do! I think the points you’ve made here are excellent things to bring up when you speak to him – that you’ve been there 6 years, and dont want to quit because of your dedication to the company, but cannot work full time after the baby, so would part time be an option? Also, that you would not request the full year, but would like 12 weeks in order to make sure things are settled at home (chid care, a routine, etc.)  That might be something you’d ask HR about (like what it means for your paycheck, insurance, etc.) but I think you’ll be fine! You’ll fell loads better after you do it!

Post # 4
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I was a little worried about telling my head of department (I’m a teacher) because I’d taken on a big workload this year and my pregnancy is terrible timing for leaving my students (2 months before final exam). But he was lovely – so excited for me and told me not to worry about anything. He even had happy tears in his eyes!!

I guess the earlier you tell them, the longer they have to think about your requests. Maybe you don’t have to make all your requests in the initial conversation, too. That might take some of the pressure of you?

Post # 5
Member
211 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@future_mrs_sommer:  I definitely understand your fear. I’m starting a new job next week and planned a meeting with my new boss for the end of this week (before I start) to fill her in. I’m definitely not looking forward to it since I don’t even really know her at this point! I am just crossing my fingers that she takes it well and is supportive. It’s a little awkward being like “I’m so excited and motivated to dig in to all my new work…by the way, I’m going to have to take a maternity leave in 5 months!” I do think, though, that scary as it is, telling your employer sooner rather than later is better so that there is sufficient time to negotiate time off and plan for what will happen to your work while you’re gone. Good luck!!

Post # 6
Member
211 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@future_mrs_sommer:  oh one other thing, I consulted with my former boss (with whom I am pretty close with) about how to break the news to my new boss, and she assured me that any employer that hires a woman in her late-20s to mid-30s should and does pretty much expect there will be a maternity leave at some point. So although the news may come as a surprise, it shouldn’t be a complete shock to anyone. That made me feel a little bit better about it all. 

Post # 7
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I just told my boss yesterday that I was leaving in 3 weeks (I am 32 weeks now) and am not coming back.  I was really nervous but he was really supportive and happy for me.  It was so much worse in my mind than actually having the conversation!

Post # 8
Member
1132 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@future_mrs_sommer:  Would you quit your job rather than return full-time after the baby comes? I ask because the full time vs. part time conversation might be one to have AFTER you’ve been able to take your leave. So for now, just announce the pregnancy and request the additional leave. Then, when you’re scheduled to return to work, ask if you can come back on a part-time basis, IF you are in a position to quit if they say no. Does that make sense? That way you won’t feel like you’re asking for too much all at once, and neither will your boss. 

Post # 9
Member
1132 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@CarolineM:  That’s wonderful that he was so supportive! Do you mind me asking what kind of work do you do? 

Post # 10
Member
3635 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

If you need to continue your benefits while you’re on leave, you might want to wait to have the full vs. part time conversation until after you come back or right before you do.  “This is just overwhelming, I thought I’d be able to handle it, but I’m not going to be able to do more than part time, is that an option?”  I wouldn’t risk them putting you to part-time and losing benefits right before you went on leave/had your baby.

My great life plan is to eventually get pregnant, go on leave, take the full 6 weeks + 12 weeks, come back for a week, “Not be able to handle it” and then quit.  🙂

Post # 11
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@future_mrs_sommer:  As a manager, here is my suggestion. Send him a formal meeting booking and outline what you want to discuss. Providing an agenda will give you both time to prepare. I hate when people just walk into my office when I have no idea what they want to discuss. It is much better that both people are on a level playing field from the start.

Post # 12
Member
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@MrsPanda99:  +1 i’d shoot him an email that says something along the lines of ‘hoping you have a few minutes on tuesday so we can discuss my maternity leave and return to work plan. please let me know when it’s convenient’

 

then he’s prepped, and you don’t have to drop the ‘it’s about the baby’ bombshell – you’ll both know what’s up.

Post # 13
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@hippomama:  I work at a payroll company in a department that handles data transmissions to external vendors.  I work pretty closely with my boss and am sort of a liason between him and the rest of the team, so I was pretty nervous on how he would take the news!  I think it helps that his wife made the same decision I am making, so he could relate to why I am making this choice.

Post # 14
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsPanda99:  +1 I would send him an email asking when a good time is for him to meet with you. Tell him directly that you want to discuss maternity leave. Then he will be prepared and it won’t be awkward when you walk into his office for the meeting.

Post # 16
Member
1563 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@future_mrs_sommer: I was afraid, too! Especially because I had just started a new job and was really afraid that they’d get a bad impression of me (as if I had lied or something). But I just blurted it out on the first day because I couldn’t take the stress anymore. It went okay and I think I proved myself in the first couple weeks here that I take this seriously and really want to be here. I just want to encourage you to go for it. The reaction might not be as bad as you think it will be!  

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