I prefer invites but I think if everyone that is coming has an email address (which they check regularly) I don't think it would be a problem
I think it's fine. Just make sure you have everyone's current addresses that they check often.
I chose evites because thats what I prefer...although if you have elderly guests or guests that dont regularly check email then it could get dicey. I still think traditional invites are the best way to go so no one gets offended or left out...
It depends on the type of wedding. If its a casual backyard wedding, then I think its fine. However, if its more formal or at a church or upscale venue, then I think its pretty tacky.
I hate evites for anything that isn't a very casual get-together. I think a wedding is a kind of event (regardless if it's a casual backyard wedding or a black tie night at the Ritz) that requires a paper invitation.
Who says you have to get expensive invitations? I would stop at Target, grab a blank invitation kit for $20, print the info at home, spend 40 cents each, and toss them in the mail.
How fancy/formal is this? If you're doing a formal reception then invites should be sent... You can even find budget invites easily online nowadays.
I think you can do an email STD but mail the invites.
@2Old4this: There is not just one "proper" form. Electronic invitations are perfectly "proper", they just communicate a different sub-text from written invitations: "This is going to be a modern-standards party, so wear what you want and don't worry about formalities" versus "This is going to be a gracious and structured occasion: break out your silk dresses and pumps; and be prepared to make small-talk, eat and drink with restraint, and generally strive for a level of propriety."
If your mom's name is on the invitation as hostess, then it's her call. Paper invitations don't have to be expensive: the most proper ones are hand-written in black ink on plain white paper. Admittedly, heavy high-quality paper is most elegant, but thinner cheaper paper is acceptable -- your biggest cost would then be the stamps.
Save-the-Date cards, however, are not "proper". If your mama wants to be "proper" and give her friends a forewarning that an invitation is coming, she should write each of them a personal note conveying the information.
@OnceUponATime: That's what I was thinking. It doesn't have to be expensive or complicated, but you really should send something in the mail.
I voted for invites because I know I have plenty of older relatives who wouldn't be able to figure out the online thing... I agree with OnceUponATime and that you don't have to get expensive invites...
Thanks everyone for your advice. I still have a little while to decide. Our wedding will be at a Country Club among a few friends and close family; less than 100 people. We want only a song, vows and tied knot for our ceremony. I'm not inviting extended family because my family is so large it would quickly move from intimate affair to a family reunion. I will take all the advice into consideration. Thanks again
Personally, I look forward to the day when evites are acceptable, etiquette-wise. Right now, I don't really think they are, unfortunately. But, I do think for the "right" wedding it would be fine (if you know all your guests really would be fine with it).
For us, one grandmother doesn't use computers at all and the others who do would still have a hard time navigating evites. So it would really leave them out, not to mention I'm sure at least one would be horrified to see this etiquette rule being broken. So it really wasn't an option, much to my FI's disappointment.
I prefer the actual invetations. We're having a small wedding (30 guests) but I got those DIY invetations you just print off on the spacial paper they provide. So they were fairly cheap which im happy about! If i was sent an evite to a wedding it wouldnt matter, i wouldnt see it as bad ettiquet or anything like that
Go cheap on invitations, but send physical invitations if possible. It's more formal, and people will take the event more seriously, I think. You can get cheap DIY kits, or event premade invites where you just handwrite the details.
Save the dates can be done by email, though :o)
@2Old4this: I agree with you here. It is a small wedding so why not send an evite. There is something formal about getting something via mail though. I feel like evites sometimes have a very casual feel to them and you may not want to portray that for your special day. There are cheaper alternatives. You can get nice premaid paper invites and maybe hand deliver some of them oppose to mailing all of them out. Make personal visits to some of your guests....could be a nice gesture and set the tone for a very intimate and specical wedding ceremony in the months to come!
Good luck!
Ladies I am searching for invitations Thanks so much for the PUSHHH!!!
I like paper invites. Some people don't check their email all that often. Or they may check it on a mobile device that won't easily open an evite. I think a paper invite is harder to lose and easier to refernce back to.
We're doing e-STDs and paper invitations. Because for most people ours will be a destination wedding, Emily Post or some such person says we should send STDs.
I know a lot of people love the paper aspect of the wedding and that's great for them. For me it seems like a lot of waste. Yes the invitations are lovely and I might hang on to them for a month or so after the event but eventually it's time to declutter and no offense your fancy invitation is going to be recycled. I don't care how much time and effort you spent on it. I only have so much room on my refrigerator and my friends enjoy writing filthy words with our alphabet letters and like the space to be creative. ;)
@notbridey: I am doing e-STD and invites too. Still trying to find the perfect one. Ugh who knew it would be this hard.
I'd go with cheap paper invites. An evite can get stuck in a spam filter, accidentally delted, or people just may not check their mail regularly.
Watch Groupon or Living Social. They often have Vistaprint deals... I recently saw one where you paid $17 for $70 worth of printing services. Google it though, because I've seen them come up for other cities than your own. Cheap printing and paper invites ^____^
Just adding to the cheap invite discussion, my mom got an invitation to a wedding recently and it was one piece of thicker paper folded up to fit inside a letter envelope, fancy font and a seal.
It made me realize that those pocketfolds we see so often on here are actually probably more non-traditional that just a simple one pager.
my cousin did Evites. We didnt mind, but then it was just a big family affair so I dont think it really mattered too much.
my cousin did Evites. We didnt mind, but then it was just a big family affair so I dont think it really mattered too much.
We live half way across the world and are returning to our home country for a wedding there with family and only a few very close friends. When we where home in the summer we told everyone face to face the date and location of our wedding, verbally inviting them, and now we will be sending an email, with e-invite attached, to remind them of the date and venue and request an RSVP via email. We also have set up a 'wedsite' where guests can go and find out more details about the big day. Sending paper invites, for us, would have eaten into our budget way too much (if I'm going to send paper invites I would only go for quality ones and postal costs would have been huge), been unreliable (the country we live in doesn't have a proper postal system and there are no home addresses, my mum has sent me a christmas card for the past 5 years but I've never received any of them) and too time consuming (I once got a reply letter 3 months after it was posted). We communicate regularly with all of our guests online via skype, fb and email and this being a digital age and all I think people understand and appreciate that e-invites are a perfectly acceptable method. Plus you're more disorganised guests don't have to worry about losing the details...it'll all be safely tucked away in their inbox :-)
@abbie017: +1
I think there are some things evites are great for, however for a wedding...even a casual one, invites are the better, more personal way to go.
We're doing paper invitations but asking for replies to by our website. I wanted paper reply cards but my guys said it'd be cheaper and they wouldn't get lost. I have a lot of old school immigrants in my family so it'll be tough but since it's a smaller wedding (50), I think we'll be OK.
@sharkchomp: I agree that is a good idea. I am having a small wedding day too.
*** what everyone else says. Invites may be traditional but they are still (comparatively) expensive, bad for the environment, and a waste of time and effort (in my opinion). Nobody keeps the darn things anyway, they just note the date down in their electronic organisers and then chuck them. To be honest, I'm probably just going to email everyone I can and link them in to our wedding website where they can RSVP. If they're elderly or don't have an email address then they'll get an invitation. Otherwise no. I'd rather spend the money on food and booze for my guests.
EDIT: I am having a traditional, formal, medium sized wedding.
@Rachel631: LOL You took the words right out of my mouth. I'm only ordering 25 invites.
I'd send invites, but with a wedding that small and if you KNOW everyone has a computer, einvites. sure. wouldn't hurt. but, not everyone has computers, especially the older folks.
I wouldn't be able to do a wedding with just Evites. There are older family members and family friends that don't do computers. Plus a lot of people want something tangible for keepsakes
I personally feel 50-100 guests at a country club is too formal a wedding for an evite. I'd be okay with (though not really pleased with) and evite for a backyard wedding with about 15 people at it thrown at the last minute.
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I am planning on sending Evites instead of invitations because I don't want to waste money on invitations. I think It's a quick, easy and cost effective way to invite 50 guests to our small ceremony and reception. BTW It is both of our second marriage. My mom wants to send save the dates and invitations because it is "proper" Help ladies !!!!!