Post # 1
Alright I’ll try and make this as short as possible. My last long term boyfriend before my Fiance and I dated around 2 1/2 years. For the last couple of months of our relationship I realized that I no longer wanted to continue the relationship ( I knew I didn’t want to marry him). Every time I tried to break up with him he would try and manipulate me into staying with him. He even went as far as threatening to harm himself and he even lied about having cancer. Seriously, who lies about having cancer? So sick. Anyways, after a while I couldn’t put up with it any longer and put an end to it. Well, every guy I even casually dated after that he would make comments to me about harming them. I talked with my college counselor about it just in case he went through with it and talked to our mutual friends who just blamed it on him using steroids.
Fast forward 5 years later I am now happily engaged. Since he found out through our mutual friends, he has now been trying to get back into my life. He has tried messaging my dad on linkedin, my brother on facebook and my cousin via text. He has been extremely manipulative in the past i.e. having his dad call me telling me he was in the hospital because he drove his car into a tree on purpose (3 years after we broke up) and sending me texts that he was going to hurt himself, but that I wasn’t allowed to tell any of his friends or family. I am struggling right now because he is dragging my family members into this whole mess. September is getting closer and closer and I don’t want this drama in my life. After 5 years I would think he would have let go, but clearly ignoring his messages hasn’t worked. Has anyone had similiar experiences? I don’t know how to move forward if ignoring his messages doesn’t work. I have changed my number and blocked him on all social media, but must all of my relatives now do the same? So frustrated!
Post # 3
Sorry, I put this in paragraphs but when I posted it didn’t show up that way!
Post # 4
@MrsDeLovely: I dont have any experience like this but I would say get a court ordered “no contact order” so he can not contact you or use anyone else to contact you. Sorry you are dealing with this!!
Post # 5
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@MrsDeLovely: Stop responding. Call your phone company and have him blocked. Block his email (and do not open emails from unknown persons.) Block him on Facebook, LinkedIn, etc… Let your family know that you do not want to hear from this person and you do not want to hear about this person. Make sure family and friends are aware that you want zero contact with this person and let them know they might want to consider blocking him as well. I am sure they will help you out with this with no problems.
I would also notify the police that he is harassing you and file a report so that if something happens, there is evidence that he was harassing you. And absolutely zero contact and/or response with this guy. Every time you have any contact, even minimal, he gets his hopes up so you need to cut off absolutely all contact. I would also worry this guy might be stalking you; if you have any evidence of that go to the police immediately. If he is willing to harm himself, he is willing to harm you too.
Post # 6
The next time he contacts you, text him or send him a written message that says please stop contacting me or I will have to file a harassment report with the police. Keep a record of this. Then, stop responding! Block him from everything you can! (don’t just defriend him on facebook, BLOCK him – I’d have your Fiance do the same) Change your number if you have to.
The police usually won’t do anything if he’s harassing you via social media/text but it’s good to report it so it’s on file. I’d give them a copy of the message you send him telling him to stop.