exes and possible stalking??

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsFarm0619:  Is it at all possible you can move? Because that is just beyond weird.

Post # 5
Member
7208 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Yeah, yYou need to watch your back.  Sorry. This is awful. I suggest you get in touch with stalking experts, because most people don’t understand stalkers. 

 

They both sound nuts, and he’s probably filling her head with all kinds of stuff about you to make her insecure. Not all of it good, of course. He could have told her that you came on to him, who knows. She’s either crazy or he’s driving her nuts, but either way, they are creating an atmosphere of intimidation aimed at you and that is wrong. 

i would keep a journal, and document these things ESP her talking like that in front of your SD. I might consider, since you have access, sending a c and d letter, if only for the legal trail.

 

So sorry you are going through this stay safe.

 

 

 

Post # 6
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@MrsFarm0619:  If there are children in the household, I would definitely alert the police so they just know what is going on. With stalking and harassment it sucks but there isnt much anyone can do until she makes a move on you. I wouldn’t suggest engaging her at all. Definitely be vigilant, lock your doors and windows at all times, be careful you never know what will make someone snap and resort to violence. Obviously something happened that triggered to start this kind of screaming/stalking behavior, who knows what it may take to push her over the edge. It really sucks cause shes not doing anything illegal so there is really nothing to do except be very careful.

 

Post # 7
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

A camera!! That is just creepy.  That also means that they are not only in the neighbourhood they are your NEIGHBOURS.

 

There is nothing you can do leagally however if I were in your shoes I would be looking to move.  A minimum of 5 km away. (about 3miles) This way you are not within walking distance and there are no camera’s pointed at your house.  The chance of you seeing them on the street diminishes as well.  

 

I get it that moving is a big deal and a big step however there is something really creepy about the entire thing.  I would do everything in my power to get away from that.  Stalking is no joking matter.  You did the right thing by blocking her from social media. 

 

Do I think she’s trying to be like you.  Maybe but the bigger issue is the camera and her yelling at you and your child.  Those are very hateful and angry words.

 

Good luck!

 

 

Post # 8
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

So weird and creepy! I’m not sure what you can do though.  I actually feel really bad for her if he’s totally fucking with her head.  I’d probably want to try and catch her alone away from him to talk and try and help her but that could turn ugly, too.  

 

Is moving an option?  If not, I’d just watch yourself and maybe set up your own video camera pointing at their house.  The camera thing is really very creepy.

Document everything that happens and don’t be afraid to report things to the police – even if they can’t do anything about it, it’s a record of the behavior should anything worse happen.  

 

Post # 9
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@MrsFarm0619:  wait  I missed the part about the camera. They cant have a camera on your home. That’s an invasion of privacy you are not public figure. The police can at least make them take the camra down or reposition it

Post # 11
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would ask the police because there is a child involved. These people sound weird and creepy. I thought you just lived in the same neighborhood. I didn’t think you’d be, like, right next door where they could pan a camera at your place. I would get the police involved in that too. I would assume that is an invansion of privacy.

Post # 12
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

So just to clarify, you have a child with your ex?

If yes, what are the visiting and custody schedules?  Do you feel comfortable leaving your child with them?

If no, who is this daughter you talk about and why is she your resposibility?

If moving is not an option, like another poster said, I would look into the legality of a camera pointed at your house.  I would also document dates and incidents.  

 

Stalkers can escalate very quickly.  It doesn’t matter why it’s happening..if its him putting ideas in her head or her freaking out and trying to be like you.  What matters is your safety and the safety of your family.  

 

 

Post # 13
Member
7279 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You need to move. Screaming at you unprovoked like that when you have child. No. Just. No. And yes I’d go to the police. 

Post # 14
Member
5002 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Honu:  She doesn’t have a child with her ex, I believe the child she is referring to is her step-daughter (her FI’s daughter from a previous relationsip)

Post # 15
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@weatherbug:  Oh! I see.  Thank you for the clarification! 

 

 

Post # 16
Member
782 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Unfortunately there is nothing that you can do about their camera being pointed at your house. You are allowed to record ppl in their home if you are in your own home. It sucks. This situation os really strange. Def get your own camera and hook it up to your computer. Then you can save all the recordings. The last time i lived in a city, I had horrible ghetto crackhead neighbors that recorded my house constantly. They were casing it to rob it later. The city cops were on the take so I contacted the feds. They told me there is nothing i can do about the camera and told me why. I really hope that these whackos stop their craziness.

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