(Closed) expecting through the holidays…

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

🙁 I’m sorry that there’s so much stress happening for you, especially now.

Though I’ve never had the same experience, the only advice I can give you is to just do what you guys are comfortable with. Take it day by day, and don’t worry too much about stuff that’s still a few months away. Enjoy the time you have now, soak up that pregnancy glow, and just relax.

Whenever the subject comes up, just tell whoever’s bringing it up that you don’t want to make any final plans or change anyone else’s plans because there’s no guarantee you’re even going to be leaving the nest for the months of November and December! Be firm but kind, and make sure your husband backs you up, too – if his family tries to convince him to agree to anything, just tell him to give them the same response you would. “Thanks, but go ahead and do what you guys want to do, if we can make it we will, but can’t guarantee anything!”

Best of luck, sweetie 😀

Post # 5
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Well it’s sweet that they’re so accommodating, as opposed to you being an afterthought.  But I know where you’re coming from.  My family rents a beach house every summer and this summer they wanted to make sure they could include me even though I’m a million weeks pregnant.  I felt guilty allowing them to cater to me.  It puts you in a tough position because you just don’t know how you’ll feel or what will happen between now and then.  It ended up working out, but you just never know.  So I’d just re-iterate that they should do business as usual and you’ll just have to play it by ear. 

Post # 6
1220 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

@rachiecakes:  An hour away really isn’t that far.  It’s the same amount of time that my work is from my home and hospital.  I honestly understand you wanting to stay “close” but I think you need to realize that everyone is just excited and want to include you.  Honestly if we were talking a 5 hour car ride or a plane ride it would be a totally different situation.

Post # 7
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I would just be honest with your mom that you don’t want to make any commitments until you know how you are feeling then. Then as the time approaches, you can just include yourselves in whatever they’ve previously planned for themselves if you are up to it! Don’t worry yourself too much now, just don’t make any promises. Also, my SIL who works in a hospital told me that usually they try to get everyone in before major holidays so hopefully if your lil guy is late you’ll be home BY Christmas with him Smile

Post # 8
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Honestly – if they’re just an hour away, I’d make every effort to include yourself in the holiday festivities if you can.  An hour drive really is not very far.  Many people live an hour from the closest hospital anyway or make hour long (or more) commutes daily.

I’d be really happy if my family was trying to coordinate event timing so I could come versus just counting you out.

Post # 9
1645 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I don’t think an hour is so far that it would really prohibit you from going all together, but I would let people know that they should be prepared that you might not be feeling well and you never know when your LO will arrive. You also don’t know what the weather will be like, so if a storm hits or the roads are icy, you might end up staying home too. You don’t know how you’ll be feeling when the time comes, so I’d keep an open mind to it.

My in laws are 50 minutes from my hospital. I was due on a Sat, but went 10 days past and was induced on a Monday. I was at my in-laws the weekend before my induction. I was tired and took it easy, but it was good to be out a bit and see my SIL and BIL who I’m really close with.

Post # 10
6826 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

OP I totally know where you are coming from, my due date is Nov 14th if I go more than 10 days over that means I would be having munchkin on Thanksgiving! I already told family either way we are not doing Thanksgiving this year, whether I have the baby on my due date or later or earlier. I refuse to take a newborn to family place when I know I will be beat and not up to long day of people. NO THANK YOU.


Post # 11
2393 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I guess it depends on where you live.  Some bees may say an hour isn’t too far, but where I’m from, it’s an hour until you even get to the next town, with absolutely zero cell phone service, and the roads are windy and narrow (and icy during December)…So, if I were living in a place like that and ready to give birth any day, heck no would I travel. lol

Now, if I’m expecting a child living in the city where I do now, an hour would be ok because it’s an hour of solid city traveling and I’d always have cell service, access to hospitals, etc.  Depends on where you live I guess.

I’d also just tell your mom you’ll play it by ear.  You may not feel like going anywhere, in which case you shouldn’t.  There’s also the chance you’ll be restless and looking for something to do!

Post # 12
5498 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

It’s nice that they are trying to accomodate you, but if you don’t think you will want to travel, and the doctor advises against it, don’t. Stay home and rest. Take it easy like you want to.


Post # 13
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

I would just tell them the doctor said no. If they want to see you, they can come to you. Honestly, when I got to the end of my pregnancy I didn’t want to relax, I wanted to keep active and moving around b/c I felt like that was the best way to get her in a good position and get her out!

Post # 14
10714 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

This happened to me too cause my son was due December 8th. Everyone thought he was going to come late (except me) and wanted to do Christmas early… He ended up coming on his due date so I got the last laugh tehe =) I’d go if it was just an hour away like a lot of the previous posters have said but if your not feeling up to it… stay home and relax let them know your just feeling tired in your last weeks of pregnancy because you will be tired! Good luck =)

Post # 15
3587 posts
Sugar bee

Apreciate them wanting to plan around you! My family (well one side) expects me to come to them at 35ks pregnant, swollen and BHed out. Whatevs.

Good luck!

Post # 16
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Just remember that they mean well, but you have to put your foot down when it is too much for you.

We’re due early-ish January, decided that we would have a big holiday trip to visit family in early November, then call it good with the traveling and having people over until the boy comes. 

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