Facebook- friend or foe??????

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Facebook-friend or foe???
    Friend : (5 votes)
    23 %
    Foe : (6 votes)
    27 %
    Other : (11 votes)
    50 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    2419 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I voted “other” because FB is, so often, a very weird place! However, I tend not to let it bother me. In some ways FB is incredibly useful but for sure, there’s some terrible nonsense on there. I still find that its usefulness outweights the annoyance value and to be honest, there’s a couple of people on my FB that I keep on there precisely because watching their online dramas are better than a soap opera.

    I can’t say that anything ever makes me jealous but then I don’t really have friends who post up reams of bragging detail about their possessions and social lives. We’re not a materialistic crowd.

    However, I am totally OVER any more duck-lipped selfies. Just stop it, people! 

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 7 months ago by  .
    Post # 3
    Member
    4043 posts
    Honey bee

    Eh, I am a very passive Facebook user. I have to have an account for work (I help manage our social media), so I maintain a personal account. I rarely do original posts and I will occassionally like/comment on other people’s posts. 

    Sometimes I get annoyed by certain people who overshare, but I have started using the “remove from my timeline” function, which helps.

    I will say, Facebook overall is a very strange thing. Of course it is just a highlight reel of people’s lives, but sometimes it makes me wonder more about their actual lives. I have so many friends who are in so-so or struggling relationships in real life, yet when they post on Facebook, it’s always “best husband ever” or “love my guy so much!” I don’t doubt they love them, but given they just bitched them out in real life 5 minutes before, it’s awfully weird they had to make a public statement of their love online. But, hey, people get to post what they want, and hide what they want too. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    1344 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    I also voted “other.” I’m much more of a passive Facebook user now than before. I use it to keep in contact with friends around the country and the world. But I tend not to interact on Facebook with those that I see in real life. 

    Facebook these days seems to be much more of a filter of the best parts of everybody’s life. It’s the part of your life that you want everybody to see, not the humdrum daily grind stuff. I do find sometimes that I start comparing myself to others who are having babies, have a career they love, etc. But I have to keep in mind that Facebook are heavily edited snippets of the what you want others to see (usually).

    And I totally agree about the couples that facebook each other with saccharine messages – especially when they are in the same room! Blech!

    Post # 5
    Member
    2162 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I feel the same way sometimes. Most of the time it doesn’t get to me but somedays I just can’t stand Facebook. I love seeing my friends’ children grow up but I hate seeing a hundred pictures from the same three minutes of the baby lying on it’s back. I love seeing pictures of my friends but I could do without the daily selfies. I like when my chef friends post really interesting looking pictures of food that I would never eat, but I don’t want to see FSIL’s gross gas station burrito wrapped in a paper towel, or read about how she got sick at work (probably from that burrito)…and I could hide these folks from my newsfeed but I LIKE these people, and I want to see their posts, just wish I could limit what I see. And my god, I do not want to see any more “bubble bath time after a long day” pics of legs, from thigh to toe in the bathtub!

    Post # 6
    Member
    9949 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I like Facebook because I can sort of view other people’s lives without much active contact.  It’s also nice to see people’s pictures, and it’s a decent platform through which to share funny pictures/videos.  I find it more boring than anything else, though.  

    Post # 7
    Member
    2240 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I can totally relate to that feeling. What I did was deactivate my account about 2 years ago. Believe it or not, except for an odd post here and there that I end up hearing about from my friends I havent regretted the decision ONCE.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1749 posts
    Bumble bee

    Nope, I’ve never found myself in a weird place with Facebook.  

    I use it how it’s meant to be used, and in a way that suits me: I observe other people, but I don’t post anything myself; I don’t take other people’s news and find a way to make it about me; I don’t expect people to post what I want to see and little I don’t; I use the “hide from feed” function; I unfriend when I feel like it, and, again, I don’t take other people’s news and make it about me. I also use a little self control and avoid certain profiles when I need or want to. 

    Facebook is a tool, and I think a lot of people don’t realize that. If Facebook is causing someone a lot of trouble, they should first look at how they’re using it, then why they’re using it, and then who they’re interacting with. If someone looks in those areas, they’ll usually be able to see where the problem is and how to fix it. 

    A lot of the issues people have with Facebook are issues they would have without it, too. If you’re jealous, petty, too sensitive, or self-centered, the site might bring that out in you. If your friends are braggarts, rude, gross, dumb, or lacking morals, the site might make that painfully clear. Facebook doesn’t cause those things, it just highlights what’s already there. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    3828 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I permanently deleted my facebook last year because i just couldn’t handle the highlight reels everyone puts on there.  it was making me feel bad about myself and i was getting angry when i would only find things out through facebook.  I came to realize this when i was on a trip with someone who was grumpy and hating things the entire time and then she posted a photo with the tag “had the best time in ___”. give me a break. 

    I deleted it and never looked back. If you are a true friend you will text or call me.  The one and ONLY thing i miss is keeping up to date on family members.  But that just forces me to get in touch with them outside of facebook. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    67 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I say neither. My FB account is not public and I only accept friend requests from people that I actually know and like. I don’t even accept friend requests from family that I find annoying or I dislike.

    Most people on FB want you to know how “happy” they are or how many “friends” they have or they want to snoop around in your life.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1734 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 1998

    Facebook is the land of mommy and grannyjacking. I don’t have so much of a problem with the snooping issue — I don’t really put anything personal on mine. Meanwhile, the one person I know who is always paranoid about people snooping on her, dogs her ex-boyfriend (father of her child), blabs about her kid/pregnancy like no tomorrow, and blows smoke up her new boyfriend’s butt every second of the day. Then, there’s always a, “Wish snoops would leave me alone!!” post in there somewhere. The girl has a superiority complex greater than any planet I’ve seen (I suspect an inferiority complex that’s disguised as one). That and an occasional reference to the great sex she just had.

    If people snoop on mine, they’ll know that I’m married and that I’m having a baby, but beyond those simple facts, nothing. I purposely leave my profile public because my stance is that if I wouldn’t want it public, I wouldn’t want anybody to see it. For that reason, pictures are very limited.

    Many, many people do use it as a tool to blast to their friends how happy and exciting and rich and whatever else they are. The narcissism is incredible (as well as the shameless, endless friend-adding). I usually pop in for a minute or two, then log off. Some people do actually post interesting things — news articles, things like that.

    …But no, sadly, most of my friends’ list is mombies. That or the housewives’ recounting of how hard they worked in the house that day. Look, I’ve been jobless — willfully and otherwise — before and since we married. But my God, if I ever get to the point where I’m soliciting “Good jobs!” from family and friends based on doing my housework for the day, I need to go out to pasture.

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