FAIL: Wishing Tree at my wedding (need opinions)

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
9119 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

I’m sorry, that sucks!  Planning this wedding makes me realize that I’ve usually forgotten to sign the guestbook at weddings I’ve attended, oopsies!  

I think it might be asking too much to send them the tags after the fact… maybe you can compile all the cards your received plus the tags in one book, and hopefully that will cover most people.

Gotta just let some things go  🙂

Post # 4
1329 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Sometimes people just aren’t down with the cutesy stuff, especially if it entails writing heartfelt messages. Not everyone is comfortable with stuff like that. Let it go.

Post # 6
2494 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

It does suck that so many people didn’t sign it, but I would just let it go and definitely don’t send the cards out with the thank you cards.

I’m another one who doesn’t always sign the guest book, or take part in things like that, not to hurt someone but it just slips my mind. And, I’ll be totally honest – usually I never know what to write other than the standard Congratulations. I’m learning from planning my wedding that I should make an effort though and I will from now on!

Post # 7
8932 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

At our wedding, we had a set of index cards that requested words of wisdom from every guest. These cards were placed at each table setting. Nobody could have missed them. Ever. Every seat had 4 cards and a functioning pen — Lots of people never filled them out.

I wouldn’t put too much stock into it. Some people just don’t know what to say, or don’t feel interested in indulging in mushy/cutsey things.

Post # 8
3753 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@maganda:  If you put the tags in your thank you note, the best chance you have of getting a reply is to put a self-addressed stamped envelope in with the thank you. You might just want to tuck some into your purse so the next time you see your family, you can ask them to fill one out. That, in fact, might be the best option.

Otherwise, I think you should just cut your losses, love the wise wishes you got and not fret about it anymore.

Post # 9
10501 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

In general, people are bad for signing a guest book and this was a step above that.  That’s why people have attendants sitting there, to encourage people a bit more.

Hopefully you had meaningful messages in the cards you recieved from those you are close to if they didn’t fill out a wishing tag.

May you could copy some of the messages in the cards onto tags yourself?


Post # 11
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@maganda:  Maybe your grandmothers didn’t fill them out because they didn’t know what they were? Wishing trees may not have been popular at other weddings they attended so they may have had no clue what is was or what they were supposed to do. Even if you had a sign, in the craziness of looking for their seating cards it could have been missed.

I would cherish the ones you have and let the rest go.

Post # 13
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@maganda:  Maybe it will help at you if you look at it differently…you are married now so try to stop looking at it as if there are sides! Your husband’s side is your side now too, so maybe you only have 3 from “your side” but together you have X from your now combined family and friends!

Post # 14
2550 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

like someone said, i’m just not into “cutesy” stuff. i wouldn’t have written anything. that doesn’t mean i love you any less or i’m any less happy for you

Post # 15
1918 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

No one really signed my guest book either. 

Post # 16
7953 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Maybe people thought it was redundant since they already wrote those wishes on their card. To me,  guest books and wishing trees are something I associate more with kids parties like sweet 16s etc. It doesn’t mean I won’t sign if asked, but I’d probably walk right by something like that  too since I don’t expect it.

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