(Closed) fall out with best friend over her bridesmaids

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4774 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

ouch sorry, that sounds quite aweful.  I think I’d dump this friend.

Post # 5
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I have an idea of how you feel. I too had experiences with friends where I was hurt that they treated me as though I didn’t mean much to them or at least care half as much about the friendship as I did. I could never understand why they would choose other friends who they do not know half as long or as well as me, over me, when it came to certain things, even as simple as accepting an invitation to a movie. I am someone who goes the extra mile for my friends because I value friendship. True friends are hard to find – that’s a fact. It’s just unfortunate when you invest so much love, time and compassion into a friendship, just to realize that they don’t care. I often wondered if there wasn’t something I did that could have caused the rift, but I honestly could not find anything. 

In your case, your friend was very wrong. She obviously went about planning the wedding excluding you. How has the relationship between thetwo of you been since she asked you to be her BM? Have you spoken about the wedding since? I know it must be very hard but it sounds as though you are not “that” friend anymore. Perhaps she has spent more time with this mutual friend, resulting in the two of them becoming closer. But that still doesn’t excuse erasing you without the courtesy of speaking to you about it first.

Post # 7
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If she’s refusing to admit to a conversation she had over a year ago with you, I’m not sure I would want that type of a person to be a friend anyways??

You’re better off without her.

Post # 9
Member
3801 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

A couple that I was friends with did this to me and had another friend call me and tell me that I was not in the couples wedding and then listed for me all the other people I had known for years that were. I dropped them as friends and we have not spoken since. I think the mature thing to do is call someone and be honest, and your friend was not. Just quietly let her fade out of your life.

Post # 10
Member
1690 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Summy00:    <<<<<what she said

and i definately wouldnt be attending the wedding,   and if she asked now or later ,  then i would refuse to be her bridesmaid……

she sounds like a bitch   to me….

Post # 11
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

This happened to my cousin, she got kicked out of the bridal party but no one actually told her… I think thats just not right at all..

Post # 12
Member
2442 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Why do you want to spend money on a dress to be in the wedding of someone that avoids you?  I’m sorry you had that incident with your friend, but look on the bright side.  Now you don’t have to spend money on a dress nor a gift. BTW all friendships don’t last forever.  

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