FAM and cycles – tmi maybe?(long)

posted 2 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 2
Member
7195 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

nestle:  Congrats on waiting until marriage and I’m so so sorry for what some doctors put you through. They should have been reported, though I can understand if you felt too young or vulnerable to do it.

In my mind, a “regular cycle” means regular times between periods (i.e. from start of one to start of next); not the length of bleeding time.

I’ve got a distrust of FAM because of the people it’s failed for. Have you considered using condoms exclusively, or mostly? After I went off the pill, we did that successfully for 3+ years before TTC.

Post # 4
Member
7195 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

nestle:  That’s why I said “mostly” use condoms. I didn’t mind condoms but DH preferred not to use them (my best friend found the same thing with her DH). So we went “bareback” once a month when we sure I wasn’t fertile – though we weren’t too scientitfc about it and I think we were a bit lucky. Anyway, perhaps you can do a compromise like that.

Post # 5
Member
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Starting on the expected day seems regular. I don’t think most people bleed 7 days, mine are about 3.5 days every cycle so I wouldn’t worry about that. FAM can be effective but also know people it didn’t work for. 

Post # 6
Member
3360 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I would definitely suggest using condoms as a backup for at least a few months while you get the hang of FAM.  Then, even once you have a clear handle on your cycle, it’s not a bad idea to use condoms during your fertile period until you feel you’d be ready if a pregnancy did happen.  My husband and I used FAM to avoid pregnancy for a year before we were ready to TTC, and even though I felt pretty confident in my cycle, knowing that sometimes your body will do something wacky and ovulate earlier than expected, we felt much more comfortable having that backup of condoms.  So we basically used condoms from the end of my period until I ovulated each month.

FAM can definitely be effective!  But I think it’s important to be realistic aboutthe possibility of something unexpected happening and taking the necessary precautions.

Also, I wouldn’t worry about your cycle – sounds normal to me.  “Normal” varies from woman to woman.  I’ve never had 7 days of bleeding.

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