Family Drama Over Guest List

posted 3 weeks ago in Guests
Post # 16
Member
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

DO NOT INVITE HIM!!!! Period no other opinion should be listened to. He should’ve protected you not abused you. I’d never invite someone who abused me to my wedding.

I’m sorry you went through that I would be scarred too. 

Post # 17
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee

I second the idea to skip invites for anyone giving you trouble over this. They are standing up for a molester. Not ok. Seriously reconsider that side of the family. It’s ok to stand up for yourself and put your well-being first. 

Post # 18
Member
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

WOW just WOW. 

 

How can anyone justify inviting him? SMH 🙁

Post # 19
Member
3504 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - Cottage in Bobcaygeon

Bee I am so sorry about what happend. This is awful. Do not invite this scum aka uncle to your wedding. This is your celebration and you have every right to not have the scum who raped you there. I would consider uninviting your aunt as well. If your cousin is not on your side about this then she should not be a BM. I would hire a couple security guards to make sure that scumbag or anyone else who is not on the guest list is does not set foot into the venue. Seek therapy please!! And if anyone in your famiky ever bring this up about you being a horrible person or what ever they say… you should just reply with “my uncle is a horrible person and she should be happy he is not in prison, not be offended he is not invited to the wedding” no one should ever have to have their molester at their wedding and ever made to feel mad about it or manipulated into having him there that is messed up on so many levels. And you mother…. idk how she has not strangled that man with her own bare hands. Honestly. I dont care who he is to her. If anyone ever touched my babygirl they would be dead. Gah Im so pissed off for you. 

Post # 20
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Absolutely stand your ground on this one. You are well justified to tell your mother, aunt and cousin that they are not invited if they continue to support your abuser instead of you. If your cousin even causes the inkling of a fuss, I would cut her as a bridesmaid without a second thought.

Post # 21
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Lake Louise Canada

As other posters have said, anyone suggesting you should invite him is disgusting, completely out of line, and does not belong at the happiest day of your life themselves. I am livid just reading this. Literally the LAST thing you should have to be reminded of at a wedding!

Post # 22
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Sorry you are going through this. There is no universe in which the uncle should be allowed at your wedding. Anyone who doesn’t come because he isn’t coming, I would cut them out of your life. They get no say in your life or your wedding. I agree with the suggestion to get security or maybe if you have a couple of male friends who can serve as “bouncers” to make sure uninvited people don’t come. Even give them a list of people invited and have them check it off. I’m sorry, I hope your wedding day is still beautiful, I’m sure it will be! 

PS I think it is fairly common for relatives of abuse survivors to deny the abuse took place when it’s another relative. I don’t know why but I’ve heard that happens. 

Post # 23
Member
27 posts
Newbee

Sorry about what happened.

answer is simply NO!

i will not invite him even if no one comes n it’s them who need to suck it up for the day.

Post # 24
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2017

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

ANYONE who is giving you a hard time about this should be UNINVITED from your wedding. It doesn’t matter if they are family – their opinions are TRASH. I am SO sorry you had to go through all of this, and I’m sure it is so hurtful to have to relive that painful part of your past on your wedding day. I can’t believe ANYONE would think he should be invited??

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