Post # 1
There are few months away and we are going to send out the wedding invitations. My question is should I invite my entire family even though one of my aunt & cousin has been bashing me, talking behind my back for about 4years now. My aunt even called me rude, and making up some nasty rumors. Also, her daughter which is my first cousin considered and called me the “B” word. They were also making fun if they are invited or not to my wedding and what they should wear.
But my other aunts that are good to me were telling me that I should still considered the whole entire family to invite them, so there’s no more drama. I just don’t get it why would I bother to invite them if there’s already a drama. I don’t talk and see them often anymore eversince I’ve been hearing untrue rumors from them. My fiance & I are paying for the most part, but it’s just hard dealing so much pressure from the family. It is hard having a big family since there’s always an issues.
What should I do? Should I invite them or not?
Post # 3
- Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ
It sounds like you really don’t want to invite them. I would explain to anyone who says you “should” invite certain people that you’re on a budget and you don’t feel close to certain family members. Don’t invite them if YOU don’t want to. Honestly, I’m not inviting about 15 aunts/uncles/cousins + my grandfather b/c they have always been awful to my family, and they are a package deal (grandfather is being taken care of by one of the families). When you are paying for the wedding yourself, a few seats can save hundreds of dollars.
Post # 4
Does the rest of the family see the one aunt/cousin? I’m assuming they do, or this wouldn’t even be an issue.
I’m inclined to say invite them – because to not, would be making such a strong statement. How does your mom/dad feel about it (whomever sister she is)?
Post # 5
I seriously don’t want to invite them, but my other aunts were making me and putting so much pressure on me. They said that it will cause more drama and they will just going to keep talking against my back. So I totally don’t know what I should do.
My mom understand how I feel she said to invite the people that cares. She knows that they’re have been treating me like that because their jealous of me.
Post # 6
personally, I wouldn’t invite them. you’re footing the bill. i wouldn’t want rude people (family or not) at my wedding. if other family members seem to think you should invite those rude ones, tell them to foot the bill for them to come. sorry if i come off as b*tchy but in planning my own wedding, people have definitely pushed my buttons and i’m sick of being the nice guy haha. put your foot down girl! 🙂
Post # 7
I wouldn’t invite. I think its your wedding and you get to choose who you invite and you really should only invite people who love and support you and it sounds to me like your aunt doesn’t. You shouldn’t feel obligated to invite anyone just because they are family.
Post # 8
No joke- I could have wrote your entire post (to a T!). I did not invite the offending family members. My day not theirs. It’ super frustrating having a family that cannot get a long with everyone, but in the end, it’s not worth the awkwardness on your wedding day (IMO).. hope you figure out what works for you, girlie!
Post # 9
I wouldn’t invite them, MAYBE if it was just a little snarkiness and you think they’ll actually be pleasant to have on the day but if it looks like this behaviour is likely to continue then leave them out.
I’m currently trying to figure out how to not invite someone myself, including how to keep other family member from spilling the date ( wouldn’t put it past him to drive 1600 miles to get back at me).
Best of luck!