(Closed) Family Face-off…yikes! I stood my ground

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1901 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Good for you sometimes it’s best to handle these things yourself and cut out the middlemen or women:-)

Post # 4
Member
666 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Good for you for standing your ground.  I hope it all turns out for the best.

Post # 5
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

good for you!

Post # 6
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

You’re right, this is your wedding and you have to think of yourself and your future hubby FIRST.  You can’t please everyone.  I understand your cousin wanting her boyfriend to come and that your mother wants to accomodate her but you can’t do it if it upsets your FI that much.  I’m sure if she does go she’ll have fun with the family.  I’ve been to weddings when my FI couldn’t make it and I still had a blast- she’ll live.  At least you’re not being rude about it, you seem to be apologetic about it.  Like I said, she’ll live, and so will her Mother and yours :o)

Post # 8
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

Good job! I wish I could do that for my second cousins, but I just don’t want to risk the wrath. 😉

Post # 9
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee

Honestly – Good for you!  You’re absolutely right and justified.  You did not do anything rude or out of line – it’s the cousin, like you said, who is being rude. 

It’s no different when people have children and their parents don’t respect or follow their wishes…  We know you don’t let little Johnny have sugar, but we didn’t one little cupcake would hurt. 

Your mom just wants to keep the peace, it sounds like, but since you stood up and took charge, you’ll be the one fading the heat.  I hope your mom understands and isn’t miffed.

Post # 11
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee

Eh.  I usually end up telling people when I stand up for something that I don’t mind taking the heat on it…  Granted, it would have been nice if you hadn’t needed to, but we do what we have to…  MY wedding people… do not mess with the bride…  lol

Post # 12
Member
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Good for you, I think you did the right thing!

Post # 13
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

YOU GO GIRL!

Post # 14
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Serious kuddos to you for not ONLY taking your FI’s feelings about it into consideration but for being proactive and reaching out to your cousin ASAP!

I’m sure your mother will say something to you about it, but tell her that you and FI discussed it and the decision has been made.  Don’t let her bully you around!!

 

Post # 15
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

my only issue is facebook announcment… honestly that site causes so much wedding dramas its not funny but GOOD FOR YOU for saying what you want for your wedding and also kudos for your FI for giving you the push to say enough is enough to people that think your wedding is the time & place to make their own demands.

fingers cross & sending positive vibes that all will go smoothly from here on in

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