- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
While my mom and my husband’s mom do not go to therapy, there is clearly some sort of mental illness they struggle with. Therapists have guessed at OCD, ADD, and borderline personality disorder. For anyone who knows what that’s lke dealing with as a kid and even as an adult, it is hard.
We’ve put our foot down with them before and they’ve made some changes here and there. But it still feels more or less the same especially when they play the victim a lot. And even when things are good with them, the hurt is still there. Just imagine both of us being threatened with disownment over so many different things from grades to talking to stepmothers or biological mothers to being told to lie to others and being physically abused. We grew up as pawns and sometimes it feels like they still try to manipulate us. Whether or not they love us isn’t the question…of course they do in their own way.
How do some of you deal with this. It feels like a case of we’re fine without them, but we communicate with them to make them feel better. And it’s hard because he has autism and I have depression, PTSD, and bipolar disorder. Most of the time our moms won’t even acknowledge that to us and the other day my mom yelled at me for not discussing my medications with her more. The thing that this has to do with the hoildays is that I’m actually looking forward to them this year and am afraid it’ll be another disappointment because we used to live out of state but just moved back to where our families live because of jobs. And I’m afraid to admit things to my mom like that I talk to my stepmother now, because there was a time when she threatened to never talk to me again if that would happen. We both really try to be loving towards them, but more often than not we don’t feel the love back.