- 5 years ago
No it is a compliment. They likely enjoyed your wedding and wedding style very much, to have picked the exact venue and church.
Trust me no one in their right mind plans their special day by intentioanlly picking a venues to irk someone. That would be starting off their marriage with bad karma. Who would pick a venue that they did not genuinely like it? Maybe it was also budget friendly?
Yes it does stink that this will be an emotional day for you. But you cant let that interefere with their special day. If you are really close it isnt right to miss it.
I would go. As my mom would say “suck it up buttercup, life isnt fair!”
I can understand it being emotional for you, but the couple didn’t do anything wrong. They picked the venues that worked best for them. You don’t get to claim a church or venue nor should they avoid certain places just because you already used them (presumably) years ago.
You can obviously decline the invite, but if I were you, I’d try and work past my issues so that you can go and support your family.
FTR, my brother and his FI are getting married in the same church and having their reception at the same place that my H and I did and I see nothing wrong with it!
it is kinda wrong to be upset with them, i’m sorry it’s tough for you though :/…
I am not upset with anyone.
I will not mention my feelings to them, I do not want to ruin their special day. I just wanted to see if my feelings were valid.
I’m sorry you feel this way, but I don’t think it’s realistic to expect people to accomodate major choices like this based on your feelings from years ago.
I think it’s natural to be emotional about being in those places (the first few weddings I attended after my divorce were tough, can’t imagine being in the same venue), but to have any negative feelings toward the couple regarding their choices is not. It really has nothing to do with you.
Maybe approach the wedding as a chance to make some new/better memories in these places? You don’t want to let the ghosts of your past hold you back from enjoying the places, activities, and people that you used to.
@hithere: My Dad was pretty angry when I was considering having my wedding at the church he married his first wife in. If it was, my uncle or cousin, and NOT my dad, I would have gone ahead anyway.
Certain places hold certain memories for you, but not for others.
@hithere: oh i’m sorry! I must have just misread things, my bad. Try not to be too bummed out though. Again, I’m sorry you’re having to confront those memories. I think your feelings of sadness are understandable for sure, and any of us might feel the same, but it’s not rational. You probably realize that though.
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