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farewell brunch?

posted 4 years ago in Parties
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    melmatt      

    is it bad etiquette not to have a farewell brunch? all the weddings I've been to have had them, but there's just no money for it. I feel bad because guests are coming a long distance for the wedding. Also, if we were to have one, who's supposed to pay for it?

     
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    amysue    6/6/09  

    I don't think there's any etiquette rule stating that you have to have a farewell brunch. Is there? I think it's a luxury and, although it's a nice gesture, not something you should feel required to do. I've only been to a couple of weddings that have done so. One option is to let someone informally spread the word that people will be meeting the next day for brunch and coffee, but not make it an "official" function; people could pay their own way, but still be able to linger and spend time together if they want to.

     
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    bonniebelle101    March 15, 2008   Charlotte, NC

    I agree. I think it's a nice gesture, and we're having one, but I've truthfully never been to a wedding were there was a send off brunch and I never felt slited (sp?) even when I flew across country to be at the wedding. My mom is going to host ours at our apartment (since we'll be staying at a hotel that night). I'm simply going to get her a gift certificate for Panera and have her pick up a few dozen bagles and orange juice. I doubt it'll cost more than about $40 or so. But really, I wouldn't stress over it!

     
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    PhxBride    10/2007  

    we weren't going to do it, but we had so many out of town guests (family and friends) that were still going to be here. My aunt was dying to do one, so she put on a great brunch, and it was just family, oot guests, and wedding party. we didnt invite the whole guest list. it was a great way to relax and spend more time with that group of people, and share funny stories from the wedding the night before

     
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    chill    6/16/07   Philadelphia

    A farewell brunch is not usually expected.  All the weddings where I was a guest, a brunch was not hosted, but all the friends would informally organize a place to meet to eat and hangout - and of course, invite the bride and groom.  My parents actually ended up hosting a crab fest after our wedding, but told us about it too late (they showed up with the crab- surprise!), and we were already on our way out to meet our friends at the crab shack. (we got married in the outerbanks, nc). 

    Like bonniebelle already said, just a few bagels and some OJ and coffee would really suffice if you wanted to do something official.  But you really don't need to.  Don't worry about it if it's completely out of your budge! :)

     
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    tanya2s      

    We had a casual buffet-style open-house brunch at my parents' house the morning after the wedding. It was really a chance to hang out and talk with people, at least more than we'd had the opportunity to the night before. It was mostly the wedding party, immediate family, and my mother's friends. It really was Mom's chance to completely host an event, since MIL had organized the rehearsal dinner and I'd pretty much had creative control over the entire wedding.

    But of course you don't need to have one, and people won't expect to be invited to one. Especially if they're out of towners, perhaps they'd prefer to go sight-seeing instead of another wedding activity.

     
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    christigpa    10/5/07   PA

    A farewell brunch is not necessary, nor is it expected in most circles.

    It's a nice gesture if the host has the time, the funds and the extra energy to throw one together. We hadn't planned on it but the morning after we went back to our house with our parents, BM and his parents, and one or two out of town guests. Everyone nibbled on the leftovers from the catered after-party and leftover wedding cake (yum!) and we opened a few wedding presents.

    Honestly DH and I were exhausted. And I think I was a little cranky. ;)

     
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    penguin    June 7, 2008   Berkeley, Ca

    Absolutely agree with all of the above posters!  There is NO need for one :)

    we will be having one, but there wont be a lot of money invested into it.  It will be at my parents house, and will basically just be coffee and perhaps some pastries, a few homemade goodies and fruit....(perhaps mimosas if there is left over champagne from the wedding!)  Just a last chance for people to drop by before theyre on their way.  I am 100% positive that if our wedding was not taking place near our house/our parents house then we would NOT host a farewell brunch (like at a restaurant) purely for financial reasons.  ;)

     
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    Deonise    06/21/2008   Edmonton, AB

    My parents are hosting a Gift Opening the next day at their house, where the out of towners can stop in to say good bye before they leave town.  The weddings that I have been to have never really had farewell brunch, at least if they did do something the next day we've always just called it a gift opening and thats where the bride and groom opens the presents.  Is that what you mean by farewell brunch?

    Either way,  I would say it's completely optional.  If you are worried about showing your appreciation for the out-of-towners attending, I like the idea of having the MC annouce during the reception, some of the guests who have travelled the farthest to attend the wedding, it lets the guests know that they are appriecated.

     

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